Does the life really worth a try ?
by Wen1
Summary: Scott and Jean have to leave each other for some days, but all don’t happen as planned... JOTT. Beware, some scenes can shock the youngreaders or the persons particularly sensible. COMPLETED ! if you want me to send it to you in whole, send me a mail
1. part 1

they blocked my account for 7 days cos I had put this long "context of the story" in a "default chapter", I haven't understood where it was violating the rule (and they haven't answered to my question), cos for me putting it on "part 1" and adding 3 lines of the fic would have been stupid. So, as I think about you, readers, and that I want you to understand my fic, I put it again despite the fact they've deleted it (only on the English version, I precise), but with the first part in addition; it'll make a heavier part, but like it's what they want, I'll do it. 

Wen, who's respecting her readers.

* * *

**Does the life really worth a try ?**

**Writer **: Wen

**Situation:** Crossover between X-Evo and the movie version of X-Men

**Summary :** Scott and Jean have to leave each other for some days, but all don't happen as planned... JOTT. Beware, some scenes can shock the young-readers or the persons particularly sensible.

**Categorie****** general, drama

**Disclamer******I don't own the X-men bla bla bla****

**Writter**** notes: **Well, at the beginning, I should've written this fic with Nicholette, but this one has only could write one part before realising she couldn't assume the continuation. So I've re-written her part with my ideas and carried on alone because I had thought a lot about it meanwhile. Having said that, I haven't spent hours on this fanfic which was in the first place a leisure, so some mistakes or incoherencies could've escaped to the re-reading, so thanks in advance for your indulgence J

I cannot really said that's an A.U fic, but a little mix between the X-Evolution's universe and the X-Men's one (only the first one). Here are the biggest points :

- Magneto has not been arrested at the Liberty Island incident but could've escaped. That's the same circumstances which have conducted the X-Men to make failed his project, that is to said: Professor Xavier's coma, Jean's Cerebo use etc

- Logan has always been at the Institute, like in the cartoon, and he doesn't flirt with Jean (thanks god lol), on the contrary, he has a protective behaviour toward her, given that he has seen her grow.

- Scott and Jean have almost the same age (around 25 years old) like it's the case in "X-evo", and the almost inexistent relationship of X-1 don't enter in count. Jean's family has disowned her. The bond that she and Scott share are their own, the Professor cans know they're using it, but cannot know what they're sharing. Jean's powers are growing more and more since her use of Cerebro and her exposition at Magneto's machine, as in X2.

- For the students and Institute Professors (given that I don't know all their past, I could've imagined some-times) :

Rogue, Jubilee and Bobby are inspired from the movie-version, it's the same for Charles and Ororo (Except that, for me, Storm is a little older than Jean, we'll say she's an 29/30 years old woman)

For the others : Hank, Logan, Kurt, Kitty, Tabitha, Amara etc they're inspired by the « X-Evo » version.

- The exteriors/interiors of the Institute are inspired by the version cartoon, well, it's more or less, that's only a fanfiction, so take it easy lol

- The Mutants of the school are the only ones known (well, with the bad ones, like in X-Evo lol), they aren't thousands like we've learned in X2.

Well, this might seemed a little complicated, but the ones who have already read the fic haven't been disturbed despite they haven't had a 'briefing' like this one lol. I'll reveal others points during the story in order not to spoil the futures parts.

So, happy reading and please review ! here or at (the other address works too)

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Do not publish without my authorization, please.

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****

The imposing outline of the Xavier Institute stood out in the semi-darkness before dawn on a July morning.At a glance, there was nothing to suggest that under the quiet guise of the vast grounds surrounding the large building, was hidden a perfect surveillance-system able to detect and protect against the slightest unauthorised intrusion through the fence of this astonishing school.

As a matter of fact, this manor house wasn't housing students like the ones who invaded campuses across the country; no, these students were mutants, among the first of this next step of mankind's evolution. The fact that the '_Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters'_ educates students with powers that range from animal metamorphosis to control of the elements wasn't a secret anymore. The Institute was revealed for what it was almost a year ago, when the news of mutants had dominated the media, showing images of the Institute's residents from every angle.

It wasn't the Liberty Island incident, some months before, which pacified the fears of the citizens of the whole world. The day of an important meeting of world leaders and dignitaries, Magneto had wanted to use a machine of his invention to artificially mutate these political leaders. But unknown to Magneto, human bodies were unable survive the change to their DNA, and whoever was exposed to the radiation from this machine was condemned to die within hours, after incredible suffering…as Senator Kelly had borne the brunt of the radiation and paid the greatest price.

If the X-Men hadn't discovered Magneto's plan, and if they hadn't interfered, millions of people would have been killed. But how can one make it clear to humans, instinctually scared and untrusting of things that are different, that all the mutants aren't dangerous? That, if some of them were striving for a war, others wanted to keep on believing in a peaceful coexistence between humans and mutants? Attitudes towards mutants had taken a turn for the worst that day. If Mystique hadn't impersonated Senator Kelly, the Mutant Registration Act would have most likely been passed and would have undoubtedly meant much more than a simple identity file.

But for the moment, the X-Men and their young students were taking advantage of a lull in activity, well-earned after the media's long and calumnious wave of broadcasts.

In a room of the manor's first floor, a young man of around 25 years old with an athletic build, was silently packing a bag. Strangely, despite the semi-darkness that surrounded him, only illuminated by the light coming from the bathroom, he was wearing a pair of sunglasses. He didn't seem bothered by them in the least, his actions were precise.

He came closer to the head of the bed, taking care not to wake the young woman who was sleeping under the sheets. Suddenly he was grabbed by an invisible force and pulled gently down onto the bed.

- "Hey, Jean, you startled me!" he gently said to the young woman who had just slipped her arms around his waist.

- "That was the plan," she whispered in his ear, enticing him to lean back on the bed beside her.

He _complied, pulling her closer._

- "Did I wake you?" he asked.

- "Yes, and no," she answered enigmatically. "The bed was suddenly empty and too cold." She smiled as Scott stroked his fingers against her cheek before tucking a lock of red hair behind her ear.

When Scott pressed his lips against hers to give her a soft and passionate kiss, letting his hands trace her body, which he already knew in minute detail, Jean closed her eyes and let herself surrender to her emotions. Words were not needed to express their feelings; they shared a very special bond. A psychic link bonded them to each other, a link which allowed them to share what they were experiencing, to know and understand each other better than anyone else. When Jean was a little girl, her parents told her there was no such thing as '_prince charming'_, '_love at first sight'_, or '_soul mates'_. Now she had proof to the contrary: Scott was her soul mate. He was a part of her, and she couldn't imagine life without him.

_Hmmm…we should stop if you don't want to be late_ Jean sent telepathically, so as no to ruin the mood of the moment.

Knowing that she was right, Scott reluctantly broke off the kiss. The young couple stayed together for a few moments, forehead against forehead, peaceful.

- "Are you really sure that you don't want to come with me?" he asked.

- "Yes. Hank and I still have some blood tests to conduct on some of the students and it's up to me to do the analysis. I'll be able to keep myself busy for three days," she answered, achieving to look at him right in the eyes despite his dark shades. "And I think it's important that you and Alex get to spend some time alone."

He nodded and quickly kissed her again.

- "I'll miss you, you know ?" he said, intertwining his fingers with hers.

- "I'll miss you, too," she answered. "But it's only for a long weekend. We'll be together again Monday late afternoon for that romantic date you promised me."

- "Yeah, but I'm not going to tell you where I'm going to take you, and don't go snooping around in here trying to find out anything more about it," said Scott, tapping his temple tightly.

- "I shouldn't have taught to you how to build mental shields," she smiled.

- "But you did!" he teased her. "Well, I'm going to go have breakfast. Do you want me to get your standard coffee with two sugars?"

- "No, I'd rather have a hot chocolate, please."

- "All right "

He captured her lips one more time before leaving the bed.

- "I'll be there in a few minutes, ok?" she informed him as he was about to leave the room.

- "Ok," he answered before leaving and closing the door behind him…

Jean stayed in bed for a few more moments before deciding to get up. Like the two days before, a wave of nausea turned her stomach, and she was thankful for having the bathroom so near to the bed.

Some minutes later, she was taking a quick shower, letting her mind wander… Maybe she was pregnant. It was not that her period was late that made her wonder, given that with the constant stress of the missions and, in particular, the events of these past months, it wasn't unusual that she miss a cycle. But this time it wasn't just one, but almost two…unless it started within the next few days. She didn't believe that would happen, maybe because of female intuition. She was tired, had morning sickness, plus some other symptoms, which had aroused the suspicions of the doctor she was. During Scott's absence, she'll buy a pregnancy test to have it confirmed. She smiled. If it was the case, if she really was pregnant, she would be thrilled and she knew Scott would be, too. They hadn't specifically discussed having children, but it had always been part of theirs plans for the future.

Once she was clean and dressed, Jean opened up the bedroom's window to allow the morning freshness to fill the room. Then, she went out, still feeling nauseous, and entered the kitchen where some students and instructors were already gathered. Rahne and Jubilee were about to reach for a croissant, but Jean noticed and intervened just in time.

- "Fasting, girls! You can't eat anything before the test!" she reminded them.

The two young mutants startled, then asked pleadingly,

- "Do we really have to do it?"

It was a grumbling voice that answered them.

- "Oh, for cryin'out loud, it's only a blood test! Ya aren't goin' to make such a huge deal each time or it'll be me who does it. And I can promise ya that it'll be quick!"

- "Logan…" Ororo reprimanded gently.

Wolverine, not yet shaven and boasting his typical morning mood (which one used to follow him during all the day…), didn't pay attention to the remark and made his way toward the table.

- "Coffee!" he ordered, sitting down.

Jean handed it to him with her telekinesis after sitting near Scott. Wolverine took a gulp before speaking:

- "So, Shades, it's today that ya leave to visit yer brother in Hawaii?"

- "Yeah, three days without me, can you handle it?" asked Scott jokingly.

- "Oh, I think we are able to" answered Storm by smiling "you'll give him our regards, will you ? we haven't seen him in a long time"

The breakfast went on in a cheerful atmosphere, the twenty Institute' students making their appearance and leaving in little groups, some of them needing more than the others to be reminded of the elementary rules.

The leaving hour went quickly, and Jean accompanied Scott to the taxi which had come to take him –the young man rather not having his car left at the airport. They shared a last kiss and separated reluctantly as it was rare for them to part for some days. Then, smiling about their behaviour, the young couple bid each other goodbye and Scott entered the taxi which quickly moved off so he would not miss his flight.

Upon his arrival, Scott was welcomed by his brother seeming to be in his best form:

- "Hey Bro !" Alex called, waving to Cyclops.

The two brothers hugged each other briefly. Scott surveyed Alex some instants, he had stayed unchanged since the young leader had found him again and had kept this rebel look accentuated by his half-long blond hair.

- "You haven't luggage to claim ?" asked this last one.

- "No, I've everything I need in this rucksack" made Scott who rather liked not to have to stay too long in a public and enclosed place because his ruby-red sunglasses were always attracting attention.

- "Great !" exclaimed Alex by pushing his blonde hair out of his face. "So, what's new at the Institute ? Jean's fine ?"

- "Yeah, she's alright" answered Scott with this dreamy voice accompanied by this loving smile he was wearing every time he thought about Jean.

- "Hem hem " coughed Alex, shoving his brother playfully "You're here to see me, remember? Me, Alex, your little brother, well, only genetically said" he précised by straightening up to Scott's height, who smiled.

- "Yeah" made Scott by ruffling Alex's hair, who didn't seem to like it.

- "Careful man !" defended Alex by rushing to fix his hair. "I wanna stay presentable !"

Scott raised an eyebrow.

- "Oh yeah? That's new" he made with an astonished look.

Alex looked proud and announced:

- "I got myself a girlfriend."

Scott blinked, even though he knew no one could see it.

- "Wow…"

- "Don't sound so surprised, bro !" Alex chided "Don't be fooled, but with the job I've, I spend my time by pushing back the chicks from my body"

Scott laughed at his brother's false pretence.

- "Oh, but I don't have any doubt" he retorted before asking some questions about the girl "So, what's her name ?"

- "Linda" answered Alex as they were approaching the line up of taxis. "You'll meet her tonight."

- "She's…?" implied Scott.

- "No, but she knows I'm one, actually, she known it accidentally but that hadn't scared her"

- "If moreover she accepts you like you are, it's perfect" approved Scott as they climbed in the first taxi.

To be continued….

Review please !!!


	2. part 2

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed ;-)

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The two first days without Scott melted away relatively quickly and Jean barely had time to go to town. She missed him –although he had called her each evening– but this would only make their reunion stronger.

Early Sunday afternoon, Ororo appeared in the infirmary accompanied by Amara, Tabitha, Kitty and Jubilee.

- "Listen girls, I'm sure we're gonna find a solution" was saying Storm at the four young mutants.

- "A solution for what ?" asked Jean, busily observing some blood-samples with the microscope.

Ending the analysis, she noted some numbers and observations on paper before directing her attention towards the little group.

- "I had promised to the girls to take them to the shopping-centre which opens exceptionally this afternoon" explained Ororo "But I've a last minute matter to attend to and they're not really tempted by the idea to be driven by Logan…"

Boom-Boom spoke in the intention to try to be understood without having to spell it out

- "It's just that…he's a man and we don't really want him to chaperon us for the kind of articles we wanna see between other ones" said Tabitha, suddenly asking herself if she hadn't been too subtle, but the telepath seemed to have perfectly understood…

- "Underwear ?" asked Jean to Ororo, a smile on her lips.

- "Underwear" confirmed the Weather Witch.

They exchanged a glance, keeping herself from laughing.

- "What ?" asked the young students.

- "We've had your age" made Storm "And it so happens that us –even if I was older than Jean– we haven't had the choice and we were to be accompanied by Logan."

Jean gathered her analysis-paper while remembering this day :

- "He couldn't stop grumbling and moaning on all and nothing, horrified at the idea that we could buy either model; it was something"

- "Yeah, really memorable, we came back empty handed such he had spoiled our desire to shop" added Ororo, smiling.

Hank made his appearance but stopped dead by seeing the people present in the infirmary.

- "A female gathering ?" he asked.

- "No, a rescue mission" made Jean.

Storm recovered her serious and asked her best friend :

- "So, do you think you could take them here ?"

Jean caught a glimpse of the work she still had to do, then at the four students who were giving her imploring looks.

- "Yes, I'll spare them our sad experience" smiled Jean.

Four sighs of relief made themselves heard.

- "Of which kind ?" asked Beast.

- "Logan and women' shopping" answered Ororo.

- "Oh yeah, effectively" admitted Hank before questioning, "Tell me Jean, if you go in town, could you please fetch the own-brand medicine I've ordered from the drugstore ?"

A drugstore, a pretext, the young woman wasn't asking better for the purchase she had to do.

- "Yes, of course, this'll give some free time to the girls" she agreed before speaking to the little group, "in five minutes at the garage ?"

The four of them smiled with gratitude.

- "Thanks Doctor Grey !" they made before going away.

- "I owe you one Jean" declared Ororo.

- "Oh, that gives me the occasion to take a break" answered the young woman.

So, Jean accompanied the four adolescents to the commercial-centre and let them some free time –after having made them promise to behave themselves– as she was going to the drugstore. She collected the Institute's order and bought a pregnancy test (which she ensured didn't appear on the same bill) before going to put the cardboard of medicine of all kinds in her 4x4. Then she strolled in the shops until the hour of the rendezvous she had settled on with the girls; who seemed to be satisfied with their afternoon judging by the bags they were carrying and the many thanks they gave again to Jean.

Back to the Institute, the telepath stopped herself from immediately carrying out the test knowing very well that, if it revealed itself to be positive, she would have trouble to contain her eagerness to announce it to Scott and, if she wanted him to be the first to know….So, she decided to let herself be absorbed in her work and went to bed relatively early, thinking that it was the last night she would sleep without him, tomorrow, he'll again keep her warm…

* * *

The following morning, Jean woke up nauseous like the others days, but with henceforth the intention to do this pregnancy-test. In order no to stay opened-mouth in front of it for ten minutes, she decided to act as if nothing was wrong and took her shower to keep herself from going out prematurely to see if the result was displayed. When the delay had melted away, Jean found herself in a dilemma: a part of her was dying to see the result, the other one was fearing to be disappointed and preferred to stay in doubt. Having said that, curiosity got the better of her and she used her telekinesis to bring the test to her, too nervous to make a step toward it. When she felt it land in her hands, she sighed and decided to clear her doubts.

- "Oh god…"

She couldn't believe her eyes and moved back blindly to sit down on the edge of the bathtub. **_Positive_**, it was **_positive_**, she was pregnant, she was going to be a mother. She smiled widely as tears of joy appeared. Yes, she had suspected it but, here, it wasn't a supposition anymore, it was real, she had the confirmation of it ; it was useless to do a blood-test in addition, she already knew what would come out, there wasn't any doubt anymore, she was expecting a baby.

She waited a while to recover from her emotions, get up and went to the bedroom with the intention to call Scott to announce the news to him, but changed her mind. He was in a plane at this time on his journey home and would have his phone turned off. Besides, did she really want to tell him over the phone? No, she wanted to do it in a good way and their diner planned for this very evening would be perfect. So, she resolved herself to await his return and decided not to tell anyone as long as she hadn't announced it to him, she really wanted Scott to be the first to know. As a precaution, Jean wrapped the pregnancy test in toilet paper and threw it away, no one would come to search in their garbage can.

* * *

Have you ever noticed that when you expect something with eagerness, the time seems to melt more slowly ? Well, Scott was experiencing this fact.

He'd left Westchester on a sunny morning three days ago to see Alex. Before this, he had said goodbye to Jean, lectured Kurt about remembering to _ask_ for something to be passed to him at the dinner table, and got on the plane. Which was, for all intents and purposes, what he had done this very morning: He'd waved goodbye to Alex and his new girlfriend (He didn't know why, but Scott gave the relationship two weeks at the most), told Alex to be careful while surfing and not to hesitate to call him or to visit the Institute, and gotten on this air-liner plane linking Hawaii to Los Angeles. Forty-five minutes later, after a one-hour stop-over, he had embarked for a domestic flight which was bringing him back across the country to Weschester and Jean.

It had only been three days, just a long weekend, so why did he miss her so much?

_Stupid question_ he thought, he loved her more than his own life, she was a part of himself without which he couldn't live, that was why.

He reached inside his pocket to find the small velvet box he had bought. He pulled it out, fingered the soft black material of the case before opening it to reveal a white-gold ring on which were mounted three slender crystal-clear diamonds. He smiled, proud to have found exactly what he was looking for, a jewel discreet and harmonious at the same time ; Jean must be far to imagine that, during their date, he was going to ask her to marry him.

Scott was brought out of his thoughts by a jerk of the plane, which he attributed to be just a normal turbulence. Having said that, the jolt happened again in a more pronounced way before the whole cockpit began to shake. The trays, the toys the little boy across the aisle from him had been playing with, and the portable CD players people had brought with them fell on the floor. They had barely recovered their minds that the plane jerked again, following by another shake strongly felt, like if the aircraft had just lost several thousand feet of altitude.

Scott had a bad feeling, which one revealed itself to be founded when the seatbelt sign switched on and when he saw the two air-hostesses coming to settle down the passengers became nervous –whereas even them didn't seemed really reassured– and to explain the situation:

- "Ladies and gentlemen, there has been damage to the engines and…" began one of the young-woman.

A wave of panic made itself hear and the air-hostess carried on by raising her voice a little:

- "Ladies and gentlemen, please stay calm" she instructed.

The mothers were holding their children and telling them everything would be all right. Scott could feel the gravity acting on the aircraft, it wasn't the first time he was living this kind of event, the day his parents had died was engraved on his memory.

The pilot's voice sounded from the speakers:

- "Ladies and gentlemen, we are preparing for emergency landing, assume the security position which the hostesses will show you again, do not unbuckle your seatbelt or leave your seat in any case…"

The judgement had befallen them and Scott couldn't even listen to the remainders of the message, he knew what will happen. Casting a glance at the passengers' terrified faces, he did something he hadn't done since a long time : he prayed ; not for his own life, but for the ones of the children and of the parents of this flight, and for Jean, he prayed that Jean would be able to hear his declarations of love.

Someone let out a shriek of fear which was echoed by the other passengers. Scott closed his eyes, reliving the day he and Alex had had to jump from the flaming plane of their parents. He remembered the look on his mother's face and the single tear his father shed, not wanting to let them understand that they wouldn't see each other in this life anymore. He remembered how afraid Alex had been. All this flashed before his mind's eye, and, at this instant, Scott knew one thing : he was going to die.

To be continued….

Review please !!!


	3. part 3

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed ;-)

I'm happy, I've understood why I couldn't see my fic; here is another part for celebrating it lol

Wen, who doesn't like this new version of the ff.net edition, cos all her make up is destroyed...

* * *

No one had failed to notice the change in Jean : she was wearing a permanent smile on her face, her steps were lighter than it had ever been, and she was even humming sometimes under her breath ; in fact, she seemed literally to be glowing from happiness.

But for the young woman's friends or for the students, this wonderful mood must simply be because of Scott's near return, nobody ignoring the deep amorous-links bonding the Professor Xavier's two first students. So, no one had stunned her with questions –and she was delighted about it because heaven knows how much time she could have held on and resisted the desire to announce that she and Scott will have a baby– and, when a remark was made to her, she contented herself by confirming that she was only looking forward to see Scott again.

* * *

No one on the plane was calm anymore. Even the hostesses weren't hiding their own panic anymore and seemed to be on the edge of the fit of hysterics. The reasons were obvious: the pilots had lost all control and a crash seemed ineluctable. What was strange, was the fact that, despite the capacity of an aircraft to glide during several kilometres even without reactors, this one seemed literally attracted toward the ground by a strength different than gravity. This reeked of mutant interference, why ?

In any case, whatever was the reason, the plane will crash, the landscape they should have flown over at an altitude of thousands of feet, was coming closer. Despite all the hysterical screams around him, he felt a surprising sense of calm overwhelming him.

_ I love you Jean he_ sent through their link, wondering if she would be able to hear it, hoping only that she knew how much he really did.

And with that, at this last thought, he closed his eyes and in an impact the world went black.

* * *

Jean had gone out to take advantage of this wonderful day in the park and went up to Logan by seeing that this one was at the base-ball pitch arbitrating a match which had to be without powers.

- "So Red, takin' off ?" he asked her, a cigar on the corner of his mouth, an impassive face, the same she had always knew. "Jamie !! you're not authorized to make a team by yerself !" he grumbled toward a student who had multiplied himself.

- "Yes, I've had had enough of staying enclosed in the infirmary while there is such a good weather outside, and moreover I couldn't concentrate" she said in a radiant voice.

- "Eager of Cyke's return ?"

- "You can't imagine how much…" she smiled widely.

- "Don't be fooled, that's obvious" he answered before grumbling again toward the students : "Roberto ! you're gonna show us yer little charm act another time, get it ?"

- "Let them unwind themselves in their way, they need it, that's the doctor who's speaking" Jean gently defended them "Don't forget that they're children and adolescents before all, they're just asking for a touch of freedom"

She had a strange feeling and looked suddenly straight ahead into space. Her bond with Scott had been growing steadily stronger as he crossed the country back to her; It was only by points of a degree, but Jean could feel it. And now, all of a sudden, an overwhelming feeling of love had seized her before all disappeared.

There were naturals phenomenon that could interfere with their link it would only be that.

- "Red ? Are ya listennin' to me ?" asked Logan seeing that she wasn't reacting at the remark he had just made.

- "Huh ?" she made in an uncertain voice, seeming still confused.

- "Ya've seemed to be elsewhere during a while, you're all right ?"

- "Yes, just a strange feeling…"

- "Troubles with yer telepathy again ?" he asked, having reported all his attention on the young woman.

- "Yes, yes, this must be that" answered Jean mechanically.

- "Maybe ya'd go to rest for a while, you're all pale"

Jean nodded, gave him a reassuring smile and moved quickly away to the Institute front door. Scott's fine, she told herself by climbing up the stairs, you're overreacting. This kind of things happened from time to time, but she couldn't set her mind at ease. Once in their bedroom, she grabbed her cell phone and called the young man, but unfortunately, as expected, she fell on his voice-box and left a message asking him to call her back as soon as possible. Having nothing to do except wait, she went to the library and tried to busy her mind by reading a book, but without real success.

* * *

Logan was pacing restlessly around the house, barking out punishments to whoever was unlucky enough to be caught playing the fool. Since Jean had came to see him in the park, and overall since her '_absence'_ , she was acting differently and seemed obviously preoccupied, all the contrary of the Jean of this very morning. Wolverine didn't like it. He knew the redhead since her coming at the Institute, as she was only a little girl ; he knew her moods, he knew her looks, and he knew that something wasn't right with her. Even Ororo had noticed it and had went to ask him if he knew why her best friend seemed to have suddenly lost her radiant appearance.

In the early evening, Jean being still in her bedroom where she had withdrawn herself some forty minutes before, Wolverine went to fetch her.

- "Jean?" he called through her door. "Don't ya want to come down instead that stayin' here ?"

Jean opened the door and stood before him, frowning slightly:

- "Scott's not home yet, is he? He should be already here."

Logan observed her for an instant. Scott's lateness wasn't the only problem, he was feeling it:

- "No. But Shades'll be back and you're gonna leave for yer date, don't worry" he reassured her "In all way, Nothin' could keep him from ya, that kid's head over heels in love."

Jean smiled meekly at Wolverine's habit to call Scott 'the kid' or to give him all kind of nicknames. He didn't seem to, but Jean knew that Logan liked the young man a lot more that he let show, and the best proof was that he hadn't been reticent for letting him flirt with her as they were just young adolescents, and this despite his particularly protective behavior at this epoch. Jean ended by nodding and accepted to follow him.

They entered in the common room situated no far from the kitchen and were greeted with the voice of the television news presenter achieving to make himself hear despite the commotion reigning in the room..

Kurt was watching the television from his perch, on the back of the couch, absently eating the pretzels from Kitty's bowl who didn't seem to notice it since she was immersed in her magazine. A group of students were helping to lay the table while waiting for the dinner to be ready, while Rogue was flipping through a book she'd been assigned by the Professor.

Without really knowing why, Jean's attention was attracted to the television where a little picture in the corner of the screen portraying a fiery plane crash had just appeared. She became imperceptibly strained by thinking again of the sudden disappearance of the connection with Scott and the fact that he still hadn't called her back. She tried to listen to the presenter's speech, which seemed to have also attracted Logan's attention.

_'… the plane, a domestic flight, had over fifty people on board including crew members. The crash happened around __2.30 p.m.__ in an abandon field once used for…'_

This means nothing, they haven't yet given the flight-number, please not let it be his, Jean silently prayed. In the living-room, the din had stopped like if the two Professor's attitude had egged the students to make silence

_'The plane has been identified as flight TCA2413, bound for __Westchester__ from __Los Angeles__. There are no survivors and at this same time the firemen are still trying to extinguish the fire which…' _

Jean had just gasped with terror which had attracted concerned and confused glances towards her. No, it couldn't be…TCA2413… it was Scott's flight…

- "No…" she whispered, placing her hand against her mouth, the other over her womb, where at this very moment Scott's child was growing inside her. "No…" she repeated by beginning to back up without even noticing it, refusing to believe what she had just heard, there must have a mistake, he…

- "Jeanie…" Logan placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, he had understood.

She was shocked, and the tears started to stream down her face.

- "No…it's not possible…Scott…he…"

Logan turned the young woman toward him and hugged her as she was threatening to fall. Jean gave in totally into his clutch, all her barriers collapsing, she started to cry hysterically, calling Scott in her distress even if each time she pronounced his name she seemed to sink again more deeply into the despair. Suddenly, she lost control of her telekinesis, the television, the table, the dishes, the sofa, the chairs and the pictures started shaking before being lifted into the air where they circled randomly, crashing into each other, the walls, and windows.

But Jean continued to cry, oblivious to the lost of control of her powers. Logan tried to calm her, but didn't achieve to, she could only focus on one thing : Scott was dead, she would never see him again.

Suddenly, as the living-room was only chaos, the mutant passed out and the floating objects fell to the ground.

To be continued….

Review please !!!


	4. part 4

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed: Lexan, Optic Red, Reddfire, Aimtbj and Slickyboy -) (

* * *

- "Jean ?" Logan asked, worried by the fact that she suddenly collapsed in his arms.

- "I sedated her mentally Logan, I didn't have a choice" said Professor Xavier, entering the room and approaching them.

The living-room was a disaster: the windows were shattered, knick-knack broken on the floor, the television had imploded, the outlets were sputtering, and the furniture was knocked over.

- "Nobody's hurt?" asked Charles, looking around at his pupils.

The students, most of them rising to their feet again or coming back from the adjacent room where they had taken refuge, shook theirs heads. All of them wore stunned expressions, shocked by the news about Scott, and by Jean's breakdown. Some of them were crying silently, the others comforting their friends although they didn't seem to be in any better emotional state.

- "Professor¡­Mr. Summers, he's¡­"

- "Yes, I know Kitty, I know¡­" answered Charles in a defeated voice, placing a comforting hand on the young mutant's shoulder on the cheeks of the powerful telepath, were the traces of the tears he hadn't achieved to hold back.

Professor Xavier had just received a phone-call from the authorities and was making his way towards the living-room to break this horrible news when he had felt the emotional upheaval from the staff and students. Hearing Jean's heartbreaking cries, he had quickly determined the reason¡­the official who had called him had let him know that the tv-news would be broadcasting some amateur video of the crash. Using his telepathy, Charles had seen the scene through one of his pupil's eyes, he had seen Jean's reaction and the unconscious destructive effects of her powers. He had realized she was no longer in control so he had to act.

Charles looked at Jean. Her face ravaged by tears, unconscious, the young woman was held by Wolverine, who himself hadn't been able to hold back two teardrops which slowly made their way down his cheeks.

- "I'll take her up to their¡­to her bedroom" Logan said, lifting Jean as if she weighed nothing.

The Professor nodded silently, but didn't follow. Logan understood that Charles probably wished to talk to the students, and made his way towards the hall and slowly climbed the stairs that led to the bedrooms.

He couldn't believe it. It must be a mistake¡­maybe Cyclops hadn't taken that flight. Maybe¡­But Logan knew that wasn't the case; Scott would never have been so late without so much as a phone-call, he was too concerned about the others, he cared too much about Jean¡­and she had been acting strangely all afternoon, as if she had felt that something had happened, almost like she had known...

Once in her room, Logan gently laid her down on the bed and sighed sadly. As he was about to pull up the sheet to cover her shoulders, his gaze fell on a picture frame placed on one of the bedside tables; it was a photo of Scott and Jean, both smiling, which Ororo had taken when they weren't expecting it. The love and devotion that bonded them were clearly evident, even if Cyclops' eyes were masked by his ever-present ruby-quartz sunglasses.

Wolverine sadly shook his head and ended to pull up the covers when his hyper-developed hearing detected someone approaching.

©¤ ¡­_Jean began to slowly regain consciousness, her thoughts confused¡­©¤_

- "The Professor just informed me about what happened¡­it's awful, I can't believe it¡­ ¡­"

©¤¡­_It was Ororo's voice, but not the calm tone one usually associated with her, no, this one seemed broken_ ¡­©¤

- " ...But there's no question, Charles received a phone call¡­Scott was on the passengers-list and had definitely boarded the flight."

- "I was¡­"

©¤¡­_Another voice, Logan's this time, answered Storm; but Jean was no longer listening. Ororo's words had acted like an electroshock. Something awful has happened? 'Scott', 'passengers-list'..?¡­No !¡­ ©¤_

Jean had just slightly startled in her half-consciousness, but nobody noticed it.

_©¤¡­ Suddenly, everything came back to her mind with a terrible violence: the sudden emptiness, the absence of Scott's presence in her mind, then the TV news, the plane crash, no survivors¡­No¡­it couldn't be true¡­he had to be alive¡­she just had to contact him and he'd answer her¡­_

_Somewhere, she knew that there was no chance, but she had to try, she needed to ¡­©¤_

_Scott ?¡­Scott ?¡­Please answer me Scott !_ she tried to send through their bond.

Unfortunately, it wasn't Scott who answered her, but Professor Xavier. Concerned about Jean's emotional state, he had focused on the happenings in her room and had heard her telepathic call. Usually, he wasn't able to perceive what was exchanged by this so particular bond which linked his two first students, but this time he heard it and it was with a deep sadness that he answered¡­ _He's gone Jean, I'm sorry_.

_©¤ ¡­No ! this doesn't mean anything! He might only have trouble contacting her ! He¡­©¤ _

- "No, Scott !" she suddenly cried, startling Logan and Ororo who hadn't expected her to come round so soon.

- "Jean," they tried to calm her, but she didn't give them a chance to continue.

- "Scott! He needs me! I have to go and help him!" she said and started to climb out of the bed.

She seemed panicked and disoriented. Not knowing what else to do, Logan and Storm refused to allow her to leave the bed.

- "Jean, no, it's over¡­"

The young woman was now half-sitting in the bed, struggling to free herself from their hold.

- "You don't understand! I have to help him! He¡­"

- "He's dead Jean, Scott is dead¡­" Logan stated, understanding that he had to tell it to her despite the torture of having to face her suffering gaze.

- "No, he's not!"

- "He's dead" he repeated more softly.

The tears, uncontrollable, started again to fall down on Jean's face. Her face distraught, shaking slowly her head, she started to quiver and her arms gave out, letting her collapse on the bed.

- "No !!! No¡­ !! No¡­. ! ¡­ it's not possible¡­ he can't¡­!¡­he¡­Scott¡­no¡­"

Ororo, seeing her best friend curled up on herself ¨Cclinging in her distress to Scott's pillow, holding it to her face so that she could smell his appeasing scent¨C started to cry and made a move toward the bed. Logan tried to prevent her by putting his hand on her shoulder, but Storm, who had seen the damages which Jean's powers had caused in the living-room, understood immediately what was worrying him:

- "It's ok, the Professor blocked her telekinesis."

Wolverine let her move closer and the Weather Witch sat on the edge of Jean's bed, running her fingers through her friend's hair.

- "I'm sorry Jean, I'm sorry¡­We're here, we going to take care of you¡­"

But it was as if she didn't hear them, it was as if she was barely aware of their presence. She had plunged in an endless abyss; she had never felt so sick in her entire life; it was like if thousands knives had stabbed her at the same time, like if someone had yanked her heart out of her chest while it was still beating, like if a part of her had just disappeared. She was sobbing so violently that she could hardly breathe. Her body was wracked by tremors, and she didn't have the strength to keep from shaking.

She didn't know how much time she spent crying, probably many long minutes ¨Cmaybe hours¨C Finally, exhausted, she fell asleep, still hugging the pillow, her body shuddering occasionally from the violence of this really emotional cataclysm.

To be continued¡­.

Review please !!! the more I get, the more I want to update soon... :-p


	5. part 5

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed: Lexan, Optic Red, Reddfire, and Slickyboy ;-)

* * *

Professor Xavier, despite the shock of losing the young man he considered as his son, had asked the officials if they had any additional information on the crash of the flight TCA2413, which had resulted in the deaths of 50 people. There were no details other than what had been broadcasted by the media - the cause of the crash couldn't be determined because of the lack of the two black boxes. Moreover, of the two amateur videographers who had filmed the crash by chance, neither captured the entire event, they had been unable to film the entire duration of the crash as the impact zone was out of their view-angle.

The pilots seemed to have achieved an uncalled-for emergency landing, although violent, but a fire broke out almost immediately in the engines which caused a massive explosion, preventing any survivors to escape the plane. The fact that the fire had spread so quickly, according to the experts, indicated fractures in the fuselage that allowed air to enter and feed the fire. The fire, fed by the ¾-full fuel reservoirs, took hours to extinguish; and the intense heat of the inferno had unfortunately acted like an incinerator, burning the bodies of the victims and reducing them to charred remains.

At the Institute, as in many households across the country, all was silent like if mourning had seized the building.

- "Jean, say something, please, talk to me, look at me" Ororo begged for the umpteenth time.

The Weather Witch had shadows under her eyes and was trying to reach her friend, where Logan and Professor Xavier had failed.

Jean had barely moved since she had collapsed from exhaustion. She was buried under the covers, shivering despite the high temperatures of this mid July's.

She was awake but remained still, staring into space. She was aware of her friend's concern but she couldn't bring herself to respond to her pleas; it was as if she was afraid that reacting would mean she would have to accept reality, to admit the truth. Time had stopped and her nausea had almost subsided, they were still here, but with less intensity.

Storm tried again after catching a glimpse of the meal-trays her best friend hadn't touched, only the glass of water seemed to have been partially emptied.

- "You have to eat, Jean. It's been more than two days, you need to eat."

Jean didn't react, but shut her eyes, setting free news tears which led to more. More than two days, almost three since Scott was de…since she had learned she'd never see him again, never ever again.

Seeing that they won't obtain anything more and feeling that Jean was falling asleep again, Ororo rose again, sighed and said some words to her friend before leaving the room. All the students, at least for the most part of them, were already in their bedrooms and, as a matter of fact, the two instructors and the Professor Xavier were about to do so.

* * *

On Friday morning, four days after the tragedy, Hank, Ororo and Logan were gathered together in the Professor's office and had left Bobby and Rogue to keep an eye on the youngest students. Most of them have yet taken their breakfast and were gathered together in the living room –repaired since the havoc it had undergone. Almost all of them have gotten back their colours, but remained relatively in their corners, without making any superfluous noise, not a day like this one, not the day of the memorial service of one of their professors, of the X-Men's leader.

- "When Alex's gonna arrive ?" asked Logan by chewing a sort of toothpick which he took out of his mouth before throwing it in the waste paper basket with dexterity.

- "In two hours, they are on an 11.30 flight, I will count on you to go and fetch him and his girlfriend" answered the Professor by turning his head toward the three of them.

- "Of course we will" confirmed Ororo before tackling a more personal question: "And otherwise, how did he look ?"

- "Always as much shocked, but he seemed to hold out"

- "Yeah, well, but he's a Summers" said Logan as if it was an evidence.

Hank and Ororo gave to him a questioning look, Charles seemed to grasp the insinuation but let Wolverine express it:

- "One-eye, well Scott, knew how to hide his emotions "

The two mutants nodded with a shake of the head.

- "And Jean ?" asked Charles "How is she ?"

- "Always the same; although this morning I've had the good surprise to see she has touched the meal-tray I had left with her last night" declared Ororo.

- "Did she eat or only touched the food ? cos' there's a damn difference" made noticed Logan.

- "We'll said she hasn't a lot of things in her stomach but it's better than nothing. Otherwise, she spends her time crying and sleeping."

- "No wonder : crying allows her to let out her pain, and sleep helps her to run away from it" said the mutant with blue fur "And for the ceremony ? How did she take the news ?"

Having no body to bury like it was the case for the families of the fourteen-nine others victims of the plane crash which had cost Scott's life, no real funeral will be organised. What's the good of burying only an empty coffin ? It'll be the creation of a memorial and not of a tomb, but the result would be the same.

- "It's I who have announced it to her" answered the Professor in a deep voice, running his fingers down his face.

- "And…?"

- "In your opinion ?" he enquired without any hardness in his voice.

- "…"

- "I asked her where she wished that we raise the memorial" he declared "She wants this to take place at the far end of the park, in the clearing where she and Scott liked to have time alone by themselves"

Storm seemed surprised by the revelation:

- "She talked to you ?"

The Professor shook his head:

- "Not exactly…We will say that she made me understand it" he answered by tapping his temple tightly. "Ororo, I know you keep on thinking it's too soon for that ceremony, but to push it back would still change nothing, this would only delay this difficult moment and wouldn't help her, nor us or the students. So it will take place today at 2 p.m., I count on all of you to make the preparations"

- "This will be" approved Hank before starting to leave the place.

Storm followed him, shaking slowly her head:

- "Scott and Jean were so close that sometimes we seemed to be dealing with the same soul it's the love of her life Jean has just lost and when I think that no one member of her family intends to come or at least speak to her…"

- "You well know that they don't considerate her anymore like their daughter since years because of her mutation" said Hank whose voice ended to fade after they've turned at the next corridor's angle.

Logan hadn't left and approached the Professor:

- "And how are ya holdin' out Charles?" he asked in a concerned voice.

Even he was suffered by Scott's death, but so many years have seen so many close people go away that he knew how to cope with this kind of pain to stay operational.

- "I have to Logan, I have to" answered the powerful telepath.

Understanding that he hasn't the will to say more, Wolverine slowly nodded his head before leaving at his turn the office.

To be continued….

Review please !!! the more I get the sooner I want to update :-p


	6. part 6

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed !! :

Aimtbj : the answer to your question : does the life really worth a try ? MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Thanks !

Lexan : you will see, you will see MUAHAHAHAHAHA. Thanks !

Slicky : you'll have to wait and read in order to know that MUAHAHHAHAHA...ok that's enough of evil laugh lol... Thanks !!

* * *

The weather was cloudy, the rain was threatening, but Storm hadn't the strength to remedy to that, and what would sunshine mean for a day like this one? Here, the nature seemed to sympathize with their grief…or to show cruelty, all depended of the way to see it.

The clearing, situated on a slight mound, was surrounded by scattered trees and looked out on the far end of the lake skirting the _Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters_' vast property_._ An engraved stone memorial had been brought by Beast and placed in front of the stretch of water, where it would witness a beautiful sun-set each evening.

The most part of the students was casting sympathetic glances at the Doctor Grey who they were seeing again for the first time since four days. The smiling Jean of the Monday's morning had disappeared, the one they had in front of them was only a mere shadow of her former self. A pale skin, silent tears slipping down her cheeks, her glance locked on the monument making official which could have been, until now, only a nightmare ; she was supported by Ororo who had preferred not to release her by fear to see her collapse.

Jean was aware that some people were paying theirs homage to Scott, by hailing the man, the brother, the instructor, or the leader of the X-Men, but she wasn't able to seize their meaning, only their emotions which were adding onto hers. She was here without really being here, as if she was projected in another dimension, like if her mind wanted to come apart from this reality she couldn't accept. Tears, she didn't even know she had more, kept on perpetually fall down her cheeks; she was gripping the stem of the red rose which had been given to her like to all those other present.

The homage seemed to have come to an end, a silence had replaced them, only disrupted by some sobs here and there. After this minute of silence, each one in turn put a rose at the feet of the memorial in an unending funereal procession.

- "Jean ?" Ororo asked her by accompanying this name with a move of head toward the monument.

The young woman briefly shut her eyes and slowly shook her head, she wasn't ready, not yet. Storm respected her decision and –after having made sure that Logan wasn't far away– released her friend for going to, at her turn, put her flower on the marble of this symbolical tomb. In the way, she exchanged some comforting words with Alex who had just made his good-byes to his brother for the second time of his life. The young man, then, turned himself toward his girlfriend and went up alone to Jean, his big brother' soul mate. He knew that no one word could describe what he was feeling, so he simply fraternally hugged her and she answered to it with the strength which remained to her. Alex felt the young woman's tears dampening his shirt and let some of his fall down. After some instants, he released his embrace, took her hands in his and said to her by achieving to win her glance:

- "Courage"

A simple word, but she couldn't have bore more. She bit her lower lip, in an attempt to restrain her tears, and slowly nodded. Alex placed a comforting hand on her shoulder and joined the others who have moved back to let the place for the young woman.

Jean seemed to hesitate for an instant, but ended up by moving forward at her turn toward the last residence of her love. For those present –except for the Professor Xavier whose telepathy was warned by a sort of droning sound which he identified as it immediately– she stayed silent, but it wasn't the case; the words Jean declared, she did it through this bond which linked her to Scott and which, henceforth, will remain forever empty. She put at her turn the rose she had so much gripped in her hands, started to rise with a wanting to run her fingers on the stone, but didn't remember having done it, and for a very good reason… An exclamation shook the group as the young woman collapsed on the ground.

- "For Christ's Sake !!" burst Logan, quickly joining her side, followed by Hank and Ororo, the Professor being handicapped in his moves by his wheelchair.

- "Jean ?"

- "Is she all right ?" asked some of the students.

They didn't obtain an answer. Doctor Mc Coy was checking Jean's vital signs but found nothing alarming.

- "It's nothing. The emotions and the hypoglycemie combined weakened her, it was rather foreseeable" he said, lifting her as if she only weighed a few grams.

He turned himself toward the Professor:

- "I take her to the infirmary and I'll put her on perfusion to make her regain some strength"

Charles nodded and let Hank move off.

- "Don't worry, she's fine, it only was a slight indisposition" he said to comfort his students.

Guided by Storm, the mutant group started to return, letting the Professor at his turn say his goodbyes to Scott, the one who he always has –during all these years– considered as his son. Logan respectfully stayed in the background, waiting for the powerful telepath to end to assist him during the way back toward the Institute, the wheels of his chair having a tendency to spin uncontrollably on the wet grass which a fine rain was starting to moisten again.

* * *

Alex didn't linger at the Institute and was off to Hawaii again with his girlfriend this same evening, after having saluted the ones Scott considered like his family and having make sure Jean was physically better. He asked somebody to tell her that she could call him whenever if she felt the need to.

Some minutes after the dinner, Logan left at his turn for a ride without really knowing how long it may last and thus the Professor convened Storm and Beast in his office.

- " Ororo, Hank, I have asked you to come because I would want you to resume the school sessions' as early as tomorrow ; I think it's not a good idea to let the students become inactive, we have to keep their minds busy, to show them that life carries on"

- "Yeah, I'm supportive of your opinion" approved Mc Coy "We can begin slowly at the start"

- "In any case I doubt they manage to concentrate a lot" made notice Ororo.

- "At the beginning, certainly" conceded Charles before going on "I will take over Scott's class, until one of the most gifted in this subject takes over, in which case I would be satisfied with only seconding him or her. I will take care too of the students with psychic powers Jean had taken charge, until she feels prepared to resume their training herself"

- "And me, I'll take over her weekly class of genetics" purposed Hank "After all, this is in my line"

The Professor nodded.

- "Good, I will inform the students by telepathy that the classes will be resumed tomorrow morning at 9 o'clock. For the danger room sessions, we will discuss restarting them at a later date. Be that as it may, they know they can talk to us if they need it" declared the Professor before tackling another subject "Have you brought back Jean to her bedroom ?"

- "Yes, I've well purposed to her to stay with us in the living room, but I haven't been really successful" answered Storm.

- "She was exhausted in any case, this day has been difficult for everybody" said Hank.

- "Yes" nodded the Professor in a deep voice.

* * *

The next day, as planned, the classes had been resumed for the _Xavier's School for_

_Gifted Youngsters_' young students. Outside, despite a summer day far better than the previous one where a brilliant sun was warming the stones of the building, no mutant was provoking a power combat's with some of his fellows, no one devil-may-care basketball match or animated bathe in the swimming pool was taking place, all was silent except for the water's rolling squirting out of the fountain surmounted by a statue of an angel situated in front of the Institute.

The sound of a motor made itself hear and increased as it was approaching; quickly, the shape of a motorbike took form in the distance. Wolverine passed round the building and, in a last throb, entered in the garage where he parked his high cubic capacity at its usual place, leaning on its stand. In a rapid move, he took off his helmet, caught it on the handlebar and was about to leave when something attracted his attention….a car was missing and not whatever one…

To be continued….

Review please !!! the more I get the sooner I want to update :-p


	7. part 7

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed Lexan, Oceanbang's, Tootsie and slicky !!!

And believe my, there'll be a lot of cliff-anger MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA ! lol

* * *

He went inside in a quickened pace, but passed nobody in the corridor guiding him to the hall.

- "As usual, there's never somebody when it's needed…" grumbled Logan to himself.

Before all things, he decided to climb the stairs and went up to Jean's bedroom. He knocked and slowly opened the door, but it was empty, same for the bathroom. _Don't panic, maybe she only has deigned to leave her room,_ thought Logan before going down again in the hall and, this time, to take the direction of the Professor's office ; but, passing in front of Ororo's classroom, he stopped in the way. The Weather Witch was teaching the history in this beautiful place with an arched and glassed roof, full of green plants of all kinds.

- "Logan ? What's up ?" asked the mutant by seeing Wolverine coming.

The students turned themselves toward him, he wasn't the kind of interrupting a session for nothing. Logan made sign to Ororo to come closer in order to speak to her.

- " Where's Scott's car ?"

- "What do you mean ? it's not at its place ?"

- "If it was the case, I wouldn't be asking ya" made noticed Logan "I thought that the Professor may have sold it ?"

- "No he'd have talked to us about it before"

- "And Jean isn't in her room" added Logan

- "What ?"

- "Do ya know if she's with Charles ?"

- "No, she hasn't wanted to go out of her bedroom when I purposed to her for the umpteenth time" denied Storm before yielding of the fact "…Oh no ! She must be the one who took the car !"

- "But to where ?"

- "I dunno, anywhere, she's so lost!"

Ororo was really worried henceforth.

- "The class is over" she announced to her students in a deep voice before calling the Professor who didn't be long to answer to her by telepathy.

_I'm on my way Ororo; Jean is not in the Institute anymore, but Cerebro will be able to __locate her

* * *

_

However hard she didn't look well after theses nightmarish days she had endured, however hard she hadn't paid attention to her appearance, Jean still owned this bewitching charm which characterized her. When she entered into the bar, some of the present men followed up her by theirs eyes, but she didn't returned anyone.

She had left the Institute without any exact destination, maybe had she thought that by moving far the pain would do the same ? But it hadn't been the case, on the contrary ; Scott's car was full of memory each one more intense than the other and it was terrible to know there won't be more, never. Under the influence of the emotions, blinded by tears, she had stopped as soon as she could and found herself in front of this establishment. She wasn't the sort to frequent the bars but nothing mattered anymore except to soothe this suffering which was like a blade stabbed in her soul.

A music was softly playing on the radio, a television was broadcasting pictures of a base-ball match, some clients were laughing, some glasses were knocking against one another, but she wasn't of this world. These alcohol' scent mixed with tobacco was turning her stomach but she didn't pay attention to it. She went up to the counter and sat up on a chair facing it. Quickly, the barman left his conversation with some of his clients and came to take her order.

- "What can I get you ?"

- "Cognac" she answered in a faint voice given slightly harsh by days of muteness.

- "A…" the barman opened his mouth but the stranger cut him as if she knew what he was about to say.

- "Please, don't ask anything"

The man didn't end his sentence, turned himself to catch a bottle, poured one glass and put it in front of her. Jean seized it and drunk it bottom up, shutting her eyes when the alcohol burnt her throat like a thousand of needles. She never had liked it, but she didn't want to feel this pain anymore during a moment, didn't think anymore about his absence…

She was feeling herself emptied of her vital essence. She couldn't help to think that, last week at the same hour, she and Scott were sharing a romantic moment on the landing stage near the lake, last week, he was still alive. Nothing was worse than to wake up the morning finding the other side of the bed empty, to realise she hadn't found him again like in her dreams, that she wouldn't been able to feel him near her anymore even if she still had the impression he would appear anytime. She had the feeling that she couldn't be able to smile anymore and to recover her taste for the life, not without him, not without Scott.

- "Another one" she asked the barman as he was about to return to his fellows.

The man came again toward her and poured another glass.

- "Let me the bottle" she said as he was recording it.

- "Listen, I don't know what happened to you, but you…" he tried.

- "I don't ask anything of you, only the bottle…I've enough to pay you if this cans reassure you" she answered always in the same faint tone by throwing two bills of $20 on the counter.

He briefly met her gaze and could read a deep sorrow in it. After all, he only had to be sure she wouldn't leave his bar before having sobered up –even if this meant to dig in her pockets to find someone to inform who could come to fetch her– thought the barman; this idea seemed to satisfy himself because he ended by seizing the bills and reluctantly gave her the bottle.

Glass after glass, Jean felt the alcohol muddle her mind, but not like she would have wanted. Scott…the pain was still here. This absence as much bodily than psychic, this interior emptiness like if she was deprived of a part of herself…yes, a big part of herself had died with him and couldn't be rebuilt, never… this was growing inside her, was compressing her heart, she felt tired, she felt bad.

In a move less and less sure, she poured herself a fourth glass which she emptied with one stroke before pouring another one. But this time, she waited a while. Why couldn't she savour some minutes of unconsciousness ? She screwed (scrunched ??) up her eyes, a headache was beginning to pierce her skull, the kind of headache which she had endured during whole days some years ago, when she couldn't control her powers…and what was meant to happen happened, without she could help it, thousand thoughts wormed their way into her mind…

> _…I dunno what I've to do……And then we went……But what is he doing ?…… She's good this one, look her shapes……ten dollars for a beer ?? he won't see me again this one…… I didn't…… Then he……and…… ………………_

She pinned her hands against her temples. Some bottles, pushed by her telekinesis, fell down and broke up on the ground, but nobody would think she was the cause of that. Jean knew what she had to do even if this will oblige her to focus on the reason of her sorrow: Scott, thinking about him had always been the only thing able to help her to resume the control of her powers. Quickly, she achieved to empty her mind, to isolate herself and reform her mental shields whereas the barman was cleaning the alcohol on the ground asking himself if his bar was haunted.

Easing of all these thoughts which weren't hers, Jean sighed, leaned on the counter and emptied another glass, sustaining her head with her other hand. When she opened up her eyes again, she saw that a man with a sloppy appearance had sat up next to her and was ogling at her in a perverse way:

- "So my pet, you're feeling alone for what I see ?"

- "Let me be" she answered in a thick voice.

- "Come on, we could go for a ride just you and me…" he insinuated by putting his hand on her thigh.

Without being aware of it, the man was projecting some images from his actual fantasies toward the telepath, which, with the move he had just done, didn't pass.

- "Remove your dirty paws" she reacted.

Even if she would have wanted it, the alcohol was so beginning to consume her that her words hadn't had a lot of impact. She hadn't even turned her head toward him and was keeping her eyes half-shut, her hand in her red-hair.

- "Come on…"

- "I won't repeat it…"

- "It's your man ? He frankly must not be a good trick for not having been able to keep you ; He wasn't…" began the oaf by trying to run his fingers trough Jean's hair, but, without understanding what was happening to him, he found himself threw through the place and crashed on a table some meters away, half knocked.

- "You don't know anything" she said before massaging her temples which the use of her powers had been murderous.

In the bar, after the moment of silence needed for the clients to understand what had just happened, the reactions made their apparitions…

- "But what's the ???…It's her !! She's a mutant !!"

- "I don't stay in a bar which serves freaks !"

- "Yeah !! We don't want this here !! Watch what she has done to Vic !"

Jean shut her eyes by hearing the threats beginning to fuse against her. She shouldn't have lost her self-control, but she couldn't stop herself from doing it ; without wanting it, this guy had attacked Scott's memory and the images he had projected unconsciously in her mind weren't acceptable that she was inebriated or not. She knew she had to leave but she felt ill and truly couldn't be able to go far away…But, after all, did she want to escape from her waiting lynching ? She wasn't really sure…

Some clients raised up from theirs chairs and came closer to her with a threatening look, whereas the bar's door opened and a man with a sullen look entered, without nobody paying attention to him.

- "Clear off dirty freak !!" snapped the barman.

- "Yeah !" added one man by catching a bottle by the neck...

To be continued….

Review please !!! the more I get the sooner I want to update :-p


	8. part 8

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed Lexan (I hope I'll have a lot of reviews at your return :-p), Oceanbang's and slicky !!

And believe my, there'll be a lot of cliff-anger MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA ! lol

* * *

- "Yeah !" added one man by catching a bottle by the neck "We're gonna teach you to…"

A strange metallic sound and the grumbling and threatening voice of the newcomer suddenly cut them:

- "The first one who touches her I change him into capriccio !!"

The clients' eyes settled on the blades which seemed directly went from the stranger's fists. They moved back with precaution as Logan was coming closer to the counter. The barman, less proud in front of a sober and visibly angry mutant, tried a move toward his shot gun hooked behind him, but this attempt didn't escape from Wolverine's watchfulness:

- "I don't recommend this to ya bub !" he threatened in a grumble by pointing at him with his claws before doing the same toward the other man " And ya, release this bottle before I become irritable!"

The two men obeyed. In a fraction of seconds Logan pulled in his blades and put a glance half-worried, half-upset on the young woman who he was came to fetch, and who was collapsed on the counter, obviously completely drunk :

- "Jean ?"

- "Mmmh…" she muttered.

Wolverine's eyes swept the counter, saw the bottle and read the label: Cognac.

- "How many glasses has she drunk ?" he asked the barman as two pints of beer crashed on the ground like if it had been pushed by an invisible hand.

A death silent answered to him. However hard this mutant was alone against all of them, something was telling them that they better have to keep theirs distances.

- "How many has she drunk ??!" Logan insisted in a lower voice.

- "I dunno…five or six….she bought the bottle" answered the barman in a bad assured voice.

- "Oh man..." he said, raising his eyebrows before helping the young woman to stand up, slipping her arm around his shoulders and sustaining her by the waist "Come on Jean, time to go home"

- "But who…who's gonna pay the damage ??" asked the barman, briefly recovering his self-control.

Logan thought a moment; in Jean's state he only could bring her back by car…

- "Ok bub, ya see the motorbike outside ? it's mine. If nobody has touched it at my return ya'll receive compensation; but otherwise, I wouldn't answer for my acts, get it ?"

The barman nodded, better not to ask too much. Logan grumbled and darted a last glance dissuading him of any ill-intentioned attempt before beginning to make his way with a Jean who couldn't stand upright anymore.

- "Hey, stay with me Red !" he said by tightening his grip around her waist as she was almost collapsed.

- "…It's turning…….I feel ill……"

- "No wonder with all ya've drunk…" he answered to her, nevertheless delighted to hear her voice again.

They had only just gone out that Jean was throwing up.

- "That's better ?"

- "Hum…" she slightly nodded before rectifying "No…" as she was starting for another turn.

Once stabilized, Logan sustained her toward Scott's car which he had spotted in his coming, opened the door and settled her before putting her seatbelt for her. He quickly noticed the key in one pocket of the young woman's vest and seized them.

The headache kept on piercing Jean' skull; she felt emptier than never and stayed between consciousness and unconsciousness during all the way back to the Institute.

* * *

Seeing the return of Scott's car, Ororo firstly thought it was Jean who was driving it, but the Professor put her right some times before Logan'shape stood out on the driver' side ; quickly, the vehicle was parked in front of them.

- "Jean ! Is she hurt ?" enquired Storm by seeing the young woman, eyes shut, the head leaning against the edge of the door.

- "Nah, she just got drunk" answered Wolverine walking to the passenger's side to lift Jean out of her seat before taking her in his arms.

- "Oh…alcohol disagrees with her"

- "This kind of drink and her kind of powers don't get along well" explained the Professor with a concerned tone "She could have lost control …"

- "According to what I've understood, that's what betrayed her" declared Logan as he arrived at Charles' level and was beginning to crossed the hall, Jean still in his arms. "The Bar's clients where I found her didn't seem to like the fact she had thrown one of their mates through the place…"

- "My gosh, it was by chance you've arrived, it's not in this state that she could have defended herself" said Ororo, perfectly aware of what humans were able to do to a mutant if they believed to be in position of strength.

Some students were surprised to see Logan pass with a Jean Grey again unconscious, but they carried on their way on the demand of the Professor whereas Wolverine was answering to Storm.

- "Oh, don't be fooled; I think she was holdin' rather well despite all she had drunk; she was still lucid, sick, but lucid" said Logan before starting to climb the stairs, the Professor taking the way of the elevator to join them at the upper floor.

Once in front of Jean's room, Ororo opened the door and Logan went to lie her down on her bed.

- "She perfectly knew she can't tolerate the alcohol" said Storm with a sad look on her friend.

- "I doubt she thought a lot of what she was doin'" made noticed Wolverine.

Charles made his appearance:

- "I think that she was overall looking for comfort" he said "At least she won't do it again"

- "In any case, I know a woman who's gonna have a bad hangover…" said Logan.

Jean slightly moved in her sleep but stopped soon after having found the appeasing scent which Scott's pillow still contained.

To be continued….

Review please !!! the more I get the sooner I want to update :-p


	9. part 9

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Sorry for the forgotten correction question in the last part…

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed, Oceanbang's, Jenn and slicky ;-)

And believe my, there'll be a lot of cliff-anger MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA ! lol

* * *

Jean slightly moved in her sleep but stopped soon after having found the appeasing scent which Scott's pillow still contained.

- "Maybe we should ask Hank to sound her ?" said Storm.

- "For a drunk ?" answered Logan "Nah, this has never killed anybody –well, except on the road– Aspirin and water, that's all she needs"

- "And above all, calmness, obscurity and rest" added Beast by coming in at his turn in the room "What has she drunk ?" he asked to Logan.

- "Five or six glasses of cognac"

- "Five or six glasses…??" repeated Storm under the surprise..

- "Yes, we can say she's put her back into it" conceded Hank "But don't worry Ororo, Logan is right, that's only a drunk, she'll recover from it quickly ; but the heart's wounds, they, will take more time to heal…"

Storm did not contest Beast's judgement, but said :

- " I still rather like to stay at her side, just in case she'd need something"

- "Yes, I thought as much" said the Professor "But you know, she would be asleep for a long time…"

- "I know…but I need it, it's just that…"

- "You don't have to blame yourself Ororo," the Professor cut her off, "no more than anyone else and in particular me. We haven't expected this sudden turn of events, but this would surely have happened one day or another"

- "You…?" asked the Weather Witch.

- "No, no need to be a telepath to understand it" smiled Charles before urging the others to leave the bedroom.

He did the same, leaving Storm looking after her best friend. Having said that, she ended up realising that the Professor was right –Jean won't re-emerge until the next morning– and the mutant resolved herself to return to her own bedroom.

* * *

Jean had the impression she had slipped into a coma and the first thing which stamped her was the awful headache enveloping all her skull which the only fact of thinking worsened. She hardly opened her eyes and moaned at the pain which reverberated in her head.

The mutant had some difficulties to gather her mind in these conditions, but she did recall some instances from the previous day. She was in her bedroom, but how had she returned ? Logan…yes, It seemed to her that Logan had come to fetch her…

She winced at the disagreeable taste which was filling up her mouth, given coated by her hangover, and caught blindly the glass of water she had caught a glimpse some instants before. Unfortunately, the remedy was worse than the hurt and she found herself with an intense need to throw up. Taking her courage, she got herself out of bed and went into the bathroom just in time despite the '_hard-rock concert'_ which was taking place in her head.

It's when she leaned forward to rinse her mouth at the washroom faucet that the reality came back in Jean's mind, not the one of Scott's death, no, this was one she was not able to forget it even only for some instants, no…she was pregnant, she was pregnant and she had gotten herself drunk…

- "…But what have I done…what have I done…?" muttered Jean as an anguish wave was taking her throat like a blast of hot air.

She instinctively raised her hand to her abdomen as she was leading herself toward the floor with her other one, her legs refusing to carry her anymore. She leaned against the wall and brought her knees toward herself as to protect herself or to protect the only thing remaining to her from Scott…But how could she has been so reckless ? She, who moreover was a doctor ! She had endangered her pregnancy, maybe she even had…no she couldn't imagine it, it'd be too hard…She could already feel the tears flowing out from her half-shut eyes.

- "Jean ?" made Ororo's voice after having opened the telepath's bedroom door.

Having heard her friend being sick, Storm hurried toward the bathroom and switched on the light by reflex which made Jean wince.

- "Oh, I'm sorry" apologized Ororo, quickly switching off the light before approaching Jean "Come on, I bring you back to your bed" she said in a low voice not to provoke the headache which was, without doubt, tugging at the young woman.

She helped her to rise and to her bed.

- "Do you want me to bring you an _Efferalgan_ ?"

Jean nodded slowly, knowing truly that this wasn't contradicting her state…but in any case, with what she had henceforth done…she blamed herself inside as Ororo was leaving the room.

When she came back, Jean was still in the same state of mind ; she took the tablets which Ororo gave her and swallowed it.

- "I've brought to you a tray of cakes too, your favourites ones, it would be good if you could eat a little…"

At her great surprise, Storm saw the telepath nod again; but the most astonishing was to hear her speak (for the first time since 5 days in Ororo's case)

- "…I'm irresponsible…" articulated Jean, the head on her cushion.

- "What ?" asked Storm once the shock to hear her voice again had gone away.

The Weather Witch sat down on the edge of the bed and asked:

- "Why do you say that ? Because you've run away and that you've gotten yourself drunk? Jean you don't have to blame yourself, it's a normal reaction and I'm even sure that Logan had gone in a bar during his ride the day before yesterday…" tried Ororo by smiling slightly in the hope of relaxing the atmosphere.

Jean shook her head despite of the pain this simple move provoked again.

- "…It's not that…you don't understand…"

- "What are you talking to me about ?"

- "…I…I'm…I can't speak about that…" answered Jean faintly "…I'm tired…"

- "Go back to sleep, I'm gonna make sure the students will be silent if they pass in front of your door"

Jean mumbled a "thanks" and went back to a sleep full of nightmares.

* * *

Jean spent the day sleeping. It wasn't the nausea or the other disagreeable symptoms of a hangover which were bothering her, no, she was scared, she couldn't get rid of this anguish to have endangered the baby of the man she loved the most in the world ; this added to the despair, she couldn't feel worse.

Once Logan had brought her dinner on a tray before joining the others for his own one –Jean having declined to join them– she took a decision : she had to be clear in her mind, she'll go to the infirmary to have an ultrasound…

To be continued….

Review please !!! the more I get the sooner I want to update :-p


	10. part 10

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

I'm kind, seeing only 2 review I wanted to wait for more, but here is the continuation

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed: Oceanbang and slicky

and the other ? please I'm sure you could send more :-)

* * *

In the first place, and despite her violent headache, she concentrated and scanned the Institute with her telepathy to make sure that everybody was in the dinning room, masking her inspection from the Professor. Once sure that nobody finish eating before some twenty minutes, she rose, slipped on her slippers, waited some instants to make sure not to be taken by nausea stronger than the ones which were already assailing her, and went out toward the subbasement.

Jean quickly entered the infirmary, painfully scanned the area again, prepared the equipment and settled on one of the examination table, the screen turned toward her. She rolled up her tee-shirt, applied the gel on her abdomen and stopped moving to release a deep sigh. She was scared of what she was about to undercover, but if she wanted to be clear in her mind she had to do it now.

Resolved, Jean tuned the equipment and switched it on before placing the probe on her belly. Even before seeing it making its appearance on the screen, she heard it…this little quick sound, her baby's heartbeats. What she felt at this time was inexpressible. The embryo was only a little more than an inch long and still had only its primitive stadium shape's of its formation, but it was alive, and her doctor statute allowed her to make sure it was fine and to confirm she must be a little more than two months and half pregnant.

She stayed a while her eyes riveted on this little being. She should be delighted and she was, but nevertheless she was crying, she was crying, relieved to see her pregnancy hadn't suffered as a result of her alcohol consummation, but also for having to live this moment alone whereas she had always dreamed to share it with Scott…she missed him so much. Jean came out from her painful thoughts by a sound coming from the corridor. She had lost track of time ! Quickly, she switched off the equipment, wiped the gel from her abdomen and replaced all the equipment. Then, she grabbed a medicine box for her headache in the pharmacy and was about to go out when Hank came into the office.

- "Jean ? What are you doing here ?" he wondered, surprised.

Like she used to do since the drama, the young woman didn't really lift her eyes at him.

- "…I came to take a box of _Efferalgan_…" she answered by showing it to him.

Why can't she only say the truth ? She had not even been able to do it with her best friend this very morning; she couldn't resolve herself to do it.

- "Oh" made Beast before noticing she had cried.

Sorry to see her in such a sorrow, but knowing that things wouldn't turn out all right soon, he pulled out a packet of Kleenex from his pocket and gave her one. Jean accepted it and slowly wiped her cheeks; then –still under the emotion of her first scan– she went out in silence toward her bedroom and passed nobody else.

* * *

Three more weeks melted away, three more weeks during which the life slowly resumed its course at the Xavier's Institute, the students began again to make a din and the professors to call them to order. A new student had arrived, he was 12 years old and was named Bryan. The power engendered by his mutation has not yet been clearly defined, but he seemed to be able to have visions of the past, the future, or even simply flashes of events which were unrolling without he was directly witnessing it. Be that as it may, Bryan had been really well welcomed by the others students and became quickly integrated to the group. The lessons were assured and had resumed their usual rhythm –the homework too for the young mutants' biggest desolation– but it was nothing compared with the resuming of the danger room sessions' assured by Wolverine…

Since sometime, Doctor Grey didn't stay cloistered in her bedroom anymore and spent most of her days in the park or the living room, sat in one of the armchairs near of the windows, staying lost in her thoughts with an empty glance, or dozing, researching the company without really wanting it, preferring obviously no to stay alone. When Malicia had asked Professor Xavier how she was, this one had answered that the young woman was recovering very slowly but that this would be long and that the fact that she agreed again to eat reassured him. Despite it, it was obvious Jean had her heart broken, she nearly didn't speak, didn't smile, didn't lift her eyes towards anybody anymore. She seemed to be with them and somewhere else at the same time, she could stay for hours in the same place without paying attention to the motions or the talks of the people who were in the same room than her. Contrary to the others professors and friends of Jean, the students had never seen her burst in tears again since the day of Scott's death, but it wasn't rare to see tears flowing silently down the telepath's cheeks, and if she left the room to be alone, this didn't fool them. She still couldn't have bring herself to remove Scott's things and had left them at their place; no one of her friends made a comment on this subject. For the moment she needed to leave his things alone, she'd remove them when she was ready.

Logan was walking through the Institute's corridors to make sure no one student was up to no good; the day before the holidays they always had been inclined to put their discipline aside. Having said that, this time, he didn't have to reprimand anybody except to ask Kurt to stop scaring Kitty by teleportating himself willingly at the most unexpected moments, or to Evan not to '_pin up_' his posters on the ceiling anymore that it was the one of his room or anywhere else. Most of the young mutants have already gone to bed, overall after the day Logan had made them spent, and it wouldn't be long before he turned in himself.

As he was climbing down to the ground floor, he passed a Jean still as pale than usual and couldn't help remark:

- "Jean, I really think ya should ask Hank to sound ya, ya didn't look well and this even with the circumstances"

- "…Logan, I'm a doctor, don't forget it…" answered Jean in a faint tone before saying nothing more than the truth "…don't worry, I'm not ill, that'll cease…"

- "Mmmm" mumbled Logan seeming not really convinced, but he had to acknowledge that she was right, she was a doctor and was in a the best position to talk about her state of health "Ya were goin' to bed ?"

Jean nodded without a big conviction, but Wolverine knew how it was difficult for the young woman to return each night to the empty bedroom where she was again in front of Scott's absence. Despite that he wished her a good night and let her resume her way, watching her sadly until he lost sight of her.

* * *

Ororo couldn't sleep; it was a full-moon night and this had always had an incidence on her sleep…maybe this was related with the nature of her mutation ? After all, the natural elements were often functioning in relation with the lunar cycles like it was the case with the tides. Storm had never really thought about it because, after all, it was only for a night of each month and never at the same level ; nothing really disabling.

In Jean's bedroom –adjacent to hers– all seemed to be quiet, but Storm knew her friend should be only in a light and tormented slumber tomorrow, Scott would be dead for a month and the Weather Witch was aware that this day will be particularly hard for Jean.

Ororo had heard her get up one hour ago, her friend seemed to have been sick again. Like the other Institute's instructors, she was anxious about the young woman's health; time was passing but Jean was still a mere shadow of herself, talking only rarely, skin deep emotions. At least, since the day she had run away, she was almost eating normally again, but still as much reluctantly, and it was exceptional to see her going round the kitchen overall if a meal was in preparation and this even if the odours were enticing and attracted all the students.

Storm sighed deeply and turned herself in her bed. Despite Wolverine's bedroom was not near hers, some powerful snoring were resonating ; well, the day before, he had had troubles organizing this training session in the open, involving all the Institute's students, and without Cyclops…

It's with these thoughts that Ororo ended up sleeping a wink for some hours.

To be continued….

Review please !!! the more I get the sooner I want to update :-p


	11. part 11

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

In front of so much review I couldn't refuse to update !

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed, Oceanbang's, slicky, Aimtbj, The Bound Woman

I won't spoil anything

And believe my, there'll be a lot of cliff-anger MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA ! lol

* * *

Like each morning since Scott's death, Jean had woken in this bed became too big, cold and hostile. The scent of the man she loved was beginning to disappear and this feeling of loneliness was growing. Only one thing helped her to hold on : the child she was carrying, Scott's child, the fruit of their love.

Her pregnancy wasn't detracting Jean's attention and was not sparing her these perpetual nauseas. Jean was fastened to this baby, it helped her to accept the idea of getting up each morning to spend another day and this despite her soul-mate's absence.

Jean was beginning to see a slight budge taking form under her waist; her breast had swelled too, but ample clothes were enough to camouflage these metamorphosis. Little by little, her future child was developing and, the telepath she was, strengthened the link which were weaving between she and it.

Nevertheless, she still couldn't resolve herself to announce her pregnancy to her friends, she didn't feel herself able to, even if she was aware she would not be able to hide it for a long time. Despite it, she could only survive, taking her responsibilities for this baby who didn't have to pay for the tragedy which had cost its father's life. Jean had to strive to construct a new life without Scott, each day equalled its pain, each day was a fight, but she had to do it for their child

Jean acted like usual and ate something before getting up –some twenty minutes later– to prevent having her stomach turned round by getting to her feet. Having said that, despite this precaution, after having washed and slipped on something ample, it was still as much nauseating when she went out of her bedroom, unwilling to stay here alone.

It was not yet 8a.m., but she could hear noises coming from the kitchen. Despite her illness worsening with the scents of the pan-cakes or, worse, eggs, she resolved herself to slowly make her way to it ; she won't stay alone in the living room, not today.

It was Ororo. Listening absentmindedly the program broadcasted on TV, she was preparing the breakfast for the instructors.

- "Jean…!" startled Storm when she became aware of her presence "you've surprised me; do you want to eat something ?"

The telepath shook her head, suppressing the nausea engendered by this simple suggestion. She silently sat down to the table, looking at the television's program without really seeing it, while listening Ororo making her best to engage a conversation.

- "Today is the first day of the students' holidays, so I think we'll be quiet for a while, all of them will sleep late, overall after yesterday with Wolverine."

Jean couldn't help to remember that, at this period of the year, she and Scott used to take the opportunity of this free day to get away from the Institute to spend time together only both of them…

Ororo, noticing that her friend had just lost herself in her memory, let her some instants, dealing with the coffee until she heard her slightly sigh. Storm cast a comprehensive glance to her, and said:

- "I don't know if you have noticed it –or if Hank or Logan had told you about that–, but Rogue had made really good progress in achieving to control her powers"

Jean temporarily turned her eyes away from the TV'screen, without looking up at her friend for all that, and said in a neutral voice:

- "…that's good for her, I knew she'd achieve it…thanks to that she won't be afraid of herself anymore…"

Ororo knew that Jean's lack of enthusiasm wasn't to take literally and that the whole sentence she had just formulated proved that she was glad for the young mutant. Moreover, a day like this one, a month after Scott's death, Storm knew that Jean's emotional state was at its lowest level; and furthermore, since the tragedy, she was always most withdrawn on Mondays.

- "I've heard you get up last night" said the Weather Witch by switching off the coffee maker before coming closer of her friend "You've been sick again, haven't you ?"

The telepath nodded:

- "…it's nothing..." she answered in the hope of ending the discussion.

- "All the same, it's going on" made notice the mutant in a calm voice "Jean, I'm worried about you, not only emotionally, but also physically. You eat almost nothing and, what you agree to swallow in addition, you don't keep it all the time; you couldn't bear some scents anymore, you're as white as a sheet, you spend your time sleeping, but you seem to be as much tired; you…" Ororo cut herself opened mouth. Associating all these symptoms, something had just occurred to her, something so obvious that she asked herself how she could not have understood it earlier… "…Oh my god Jean, you're pregnant, that's it ?" she asked, hoping not to make a mistake.

The young woman became taut at these words, but Storm hadn't the intention to give the game away overall that Jean's reaction was only accentuating her presumptions.

- "That's it, isn't it ? Jean, please, look at me" she asked in a soft voice "Jean, look at me"

The telepath closed her eyes some instants, sighed softly to give herself some courage, before slowly turning her head toward Ororo and looked up at her for the first time since weeks.

- "Am I right ? you're pregnant ?"

Jean looked down again, slightly bit her lower lip and nodded.

- "…about three and half months…" she said even before Ororo could ask her the question "…I know it since a month, day for day…" She added as a tear, soon followed by another one, had escaped at her control and was clearing its way down her cheek.

Storm had just slowly sank into a chair near her and took some instants to recover from her emotions.

- "One month day for day…but that means…oh my god, the day you were so radiant without us knowing why, the day of…"

Jean didn't even bother to hold back her tears which had begun to silently flow out. Storm saw here the answer of her question, but another one came:

- "Why haven't you told it to us Jean ?" she asked by placing her hand on her friend's one.

- "…I…I dunno, I couldn't…" articulated Jean by pressing her other hand on her cheeks, wiping her tears away, at least temporally, "…something was preventing me from doing it…I was afraid…afraid that by making it official I risk to lost it too…" she said before choking back a sob "…this baby…it's the only thing remaining from him… it's all Scott had left to me …"

Storm felt the tears came in her eyes.

- "Did…did **_HE_** know about it?" she asked tactfully.

To be continued….

Review please !!! the more I get the sooner I want to update :-p


	12. part 12

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

I wanted to update only tomorrow, bu in front of so much reviews I couldn't refuse to do it sooner !

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed, Oceanbang, slicky, Aimtbj, and the lot ones of Lexan

I won't spoil anything, I better won't…

And believe my, there'll be a lot of cliff-anger MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA ! lol

And I've written an really horrible fic in the evo-verse, which Aerial is correcting (the translation) Muahahahahaha

* * *

- "Did…did **_HE_** know about it?" she asked tactfully.

Jean bit again her lower lip, searching obviously to hold back a little more her emotions.

- "…no…" she articulated before going on "…I…I was suspecting I was pregnant…but I…I wanted to confirm it….when I knew it…I've decided to wait for our date at his return…but he never came back…I…Oh Ororo, I miss him so much !!" she ended by bursting into tears, burying her face in her hands.

The Weather Witch couldn't hold on her own tears anymore and took her best friend in her arms. They just had had the longest conversation since the tragedy which one had just revealed to her a secret kept buried during all this time. Jean seemed to her to be even more fragile than ever and Ororo was afraid to break her. She couldn't get over it, her best friend was expecting a baby, she who seemed to be unable to look at her own future…but at the same time, this last one was helping her to carry on.

Logan made his appearance into the kitchen and stopped at the sight of the scene. Ororo made him a sign not to step in and he didn't protest even if seeing Jean in this state was breaking his heart (And this even if numerous students believed he was devoid of it)

After some minutes, feeling Jean becoming exhausted, Storm helped her to stand up and lead her to the living-room; Wolverine didn't follow them, respecting her request.

- "Here, lie down"

The telepath stretched herself on the sofa and sighed deeply before drying her tears. She was feeling tired all of a sudden, and felt her eyelids becoming heavier and heavier; all these emotions had exhausted her.

- "That's better ?" asked Storm, crouched near her "Do you want me to bring you something ? maybe something to eat ?"

- "…don't speak to me about food…"

Storm slightly smiled at her remark referring to the nausea accompanying a pregnancy, before seeing Jean shiver.

- "Then, maybe a blanket…?"

The young woman nodded and Ororo got to her feet.

- "Well, I'll be back soon" she said softly.

Sometimes later, she was extending the woollen blanket on her friend and declared:

- "Now I understand better why you were always wearing ample clothes whereas you don't have a lot, you were beginning to have more shapes…"

Jean confirmed with a slight nod, her eyes half shut, as she was falling asleep. Ororo was about to let her rest, but asked her a last question:

- "Do you want me to announce it to the others?, or…"

- "…no, do it…" answered Jean.

Ororo accepted and went to draw the curtains of the living room before leaving the place.

* * *

When Storm came back in the kitchen, she found the Professor Xavier and Hank in addition of Logan, this last one having obviously informed the others of the state in which he had discovered the two friends. The three men looked at her without asking her any question as she went to fill up herself a glass of milk which one she slowly drank; wiping away her tears with the back of her hand.

- "So ?" ended by asking Wolverine, his patience having its limits well known "What happened ? I know today's a particular one, but I'm sure there was another reason for havin' wanted to stay alone with her"

The Weather Witch sat down at the kitchen table and stayed silent during a while before ending by nod:

- "Yes, there's something else. You remember that the fact of seeing Jean eat again had reassured us, when we were saying that, at least, she had something in her belly ?"

The three of them nodded, seeming to see more or less where Ororo was driving at.

- "…Well, we didn't know how much we were right, Jean is pregnant." she announced.

- "What ? But how ? When I've found her at the bar, she…. »

- "No no no Logan, you don't understand" Storm cut him, seeing he was on the wrong track "She's pregnant from Scott, actually she's about three and half a months pregnant, and it's that news which had made her so happy last month without us knowing why…"

- "My god…" said the Professor in an overwhelmed voice by immediately understanding what this meant "So, the day which should have been one of the happiest of her life had also been the one having seen her worse nightmare happen…I guess Scott never knew it ?" he asked.

Storm sadly nodded.

- "And she's kept this secret during all these weeks whereas we could have supported her ?" said Hank, incredulous.

Charles spoke again:

- "I guess she hasn't managed to speak to us about that because something was preventing her from doing it or was scaring her ; that's why I've never known – even the rare times where I've had to enter in her mind – and that she has never projected it unwillingly…"

Storm nodded:

- "And here, she didn't tell me about it; the realisation came to me" she specified before adding "I've to admit that at the beginning, knowing she hadn't said anything to me, I felt a little disappointed ; but after I've understood : she had just lost Scott and was afraid to lose the baby she was expecting too."

- "But what is surprising is that she never had let it escape" made notice Hank "that's not the kind of thing a woman would hide, overall when it's a desired pregnancy like I'm sure it is"

- "In other circumstances you'd well know she'd have told us" explained Storm "She wanted Scott to be the first to be informed…poor Jean"

She stayed pensive a while before realising something:

- "But…Now that I think about that, I believe she nearly said it to me, the day after her run away…"

The three others mutants gave her a glance egging her to go on.

- "I found her in tears in her bathroom this day and –after having helped her to re-turn in her bed– she said something to me, she said that she was '_irresponsible'_, but she hadn't wanted to tell me more even if she seemed to want to by beginning her sentence" said Storm "Now, I understand, she was blaming herself because of her baby"

- "So, if you're right," began Hank as much pensive "When I've found her in the infirmary this very evening, something tells me she wasn't there for a box of Efferalgan…"

- "You're thinking about exams, like a scan by example ?" asked the Professor.

- "Yes, she had the material and the competences to do it by herself" nodded Beast.

- "She'll need us, overall under the circumstances; pregnant, she's emotionally more fragile " declared Storm.

- "Moreover, in my knowledge, this pregnancy is the first one fathered by two mutants, and furthermore of Alpha class mutants."

The Professor nodded.

- "And where is she now ?" asked Logan.

- "In the living-room resting, I made her comfortable on a sofa" answered Ororo "Crying like that had exhausted her, she was slumbering even before I let her ; Besides, she wanted me to announce her pregnancy to you on her behalf"

A silence fell in the room, each one being cut in their own thoughts.

* * *

He was in this tiny cell for months, or maybe was it only weeks? He hadn't got a clue, his mind had stayed too long confused by tranquillisers which had been administrated to him and, in any case, time didn't matter, not now…

To be continued….

Review please !!! the more I get the sooner I want to update :-p


	13. part 13

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

In front of so much reviews I couldn't refuse to update !

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed, Oceanbang's, slicky, Aimtbj, Lexan, Jenn and Kyer !!!

I won't spoil anything, I better won't…

And believe my, there'll be a lot of cliff-anger MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA ! lol

* * *

He was in this tiny cell for months, or maybe was it only weeks? He hadn't got a clue, his mind had stayed too long confused by tranquillisers which had been administrated to him and, in any case, time didn't matter, not now. Even if he could see again otherwise than in shades of red, he had nothing to watch except for some iron rails and a rudimentary bathroom without mirror…they didn't want him to use it to kill himself, the young man knew it ; any object which he could use in this purpose was not left at his disposition, they had even taken off his shoes in case he could use the laces undiscerningly…

A sound of the door opening made it heard and a feline-like woman with strange blue-skin went to slide a tray through a gap and set out again after having given him a perfidious smile. Scott didn't even look at her, no more did he make a move toward the food. He sighed deeply and shut his eyes. During some seconds, he found again Jean, full of life, like he recalled her, but quickly the reality took over and he lived again the horror of the young woman's death, covered in blood, her face expressing pain and fear, releasing her last breath in his arms before he was being knocked out cold from behind.

* * *

Mystique passed in front of some members of the acolytes and rejoined Magneto.

- "So ?" asked Eric.

- "Unchanged" answered the mutant in an enigmatic voice, a thin smile on the lips corner.

- "I've told you" made a man whose face was partially covered by his hair "even without the tranquillisers there wasn't any reason he could realise the hoax."

- "Two precautions are better than one Mastermind" answered Magneto in a considered tone "Having said that, I've to admit you've done well. Mystique, give him what he deserves and let him go"

The metamorph nodded in a glance and moved away, Mastermind on her heels.

Magneto, finding himself alone, attracted a metal chair toward him and sat down slowly, a satisfied smile on his lips. Some months before, despite Mystique's intervention to put Charles Xavier offside and like it prevent him to undercover his purpose with Cerebro's help, Magneto's projects had failed. And why ? Because of Jean Grey, one of his '_old friend's_' favourite students –a telepath–, had achieved to use the engine and to locate him, allowing the X-men's leader –alias Scott Summers– to lead an attack against him and his acolytes. Because of Charles Xavier and of his two first students' obstinacy, Magneto had lost his engine, hadn't achieved his aims and had almost been caught by the authorities as he was not able to defend himself because of Cyclops previous blast's.

The spite had angered him for months but he had found how to take revenge of the three of them at the same time…But, for this there was no question of killing any of the X-Men, no, this should've been too easy ; so, he had summoned up strategies and subterfuges: Jean Grey and Charles Xavier were suffering because they believed their love or their spiritual-son had died in a plane-crash, which Magneto had provoked ; and the X-Men's leader was suffering all the same because –thanks to Mastermind who had modified his memory– he was convinced that the woman he loved the most in the world had died in his arms.

All had worked as planned, he had provoked the crash of the flight number _TCA2413_ but had subdued the collision with the ground to extract Scott Summers from it before authorizing Pyro to deal with the aircraft. And for the fifty passengers ? It was only humans after all and they were a threat.

To prevent Cerebro from locating by accident the psychic-signature of their prisoner, Magneto simply had had to bring him to his sanctuary, the metal surrounding the building being the same than the one of his helmet, Scott Summers hadn't any chance to be found, moreover that he was officially dead…

For the remains, Cyclops extracting his power from the sun, Magneto only had had to keep him under tranquillisers and sheltered from all sunlight until his devastating blasts sent by his eyes were exhausted.

This delay was henceforth past, they've nothing to fear from Scott's mutation anymore, and they had stopped using tranquillisers to knock him out in order to let the young man plainly suffer the loss of his Jean Grey. And, who knows, maybe Magneto would try to eradicate some information from him…

All this production was Machiavellian, but those three X-Men had destroyed his dream which Magneto had needed years to realise.

* * *

More than a week later, at the Institute.

- "Hank ? are you there ?" asked Ororo by entering in the infirmary before seeing he wasn't alone, as a matter of fact, Jean was settled on one of the examination table. "A scan ? Can I…?" asked the Weather Witch toward her best friend.

- "Of course…" answered Jean.

- "You wanted to ask me something ?" asked Beast at Storm

- "Huh ? Oh, just to tell you Professor Xavier had finish reading the paper on your last study, but everything in its time" answered Ororo.

Hank smiled and ended to spread the gel on the telepath's slightly bulging abdomen and placed the probe on it. Like the previous time, a heartbeat sound faster than Jean's one made itself hear even before the image appeared on the screen.

- "It's the baby's?"

- "Yes Storm" answered Hank "And here is the little one…" he made as the foetus' moving shape was partially appearing on the screen.

- "Oh, that's incredible, that's…yes that's its head, isn't it ?…Oh Jean, do you realise ?" Ororo was ecstatic.

The mother-to-be was keeping her eyes riveted on the screen, a smile formed on her lips. Hank made the scan-reading necessary and carried on the ultrasound.

- "Ah, Jean, I can say you're expecting a…"

But the young woman, knowing as well how to '_read'_ a scan ended his sentence in a voice filled of emotion:

- "A boy…"

- "Yes, a boy" confirmed Hank, smiling.

For a while, some life came back to animate Jean's eyes, but the sadness still over-shadowed her and the tears made their appearance.

- "I'm sorry…" she said by pressing a hand to her cheeks.

- "No, you don't have to, we understand Jean, and the hormones aren't here to help you" supposed Ororo in a friendly voice.

Hank returned his attention to the screen and declared :

- "In any case –like you can see– with regards to your pregnancy, everything is fine, the foetus has all he needs where it's needed and he's of average weight and length for a four month old one …Hey, look at him, he begins to kick " he pointed to the screen.

- "It's crazy…" smiled Storm "Have you felt it ?" she asked to her best friend.

- "It's still to soon…" she answered by shaking her head.

After some additional instants, Hank gave Jean a towel to let her wipe the gel of her abdomen and gave her the tape after having pulled it out of the video-recorder.

- "I thought you'd like to keep these first pictures"

Jean nodded to thanks him and straightened her clothes before sliding down off the table.

- "I think it's unnecessary to put it away "added Hank "I know one or two people who would be delighted to watch it even if one of them will maybe have some difficulties to admit it…"

- "Logan…" supposed Ororo, smiling.

To be continued….

Review please !!! the more I get the sooner I want to update :-p


	14. part 14

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

In front of so much reviews I couldn't refuse to update !

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed, Aimtbj, Lexan, and Kim direct :

**Aimtbj**** :** of course he's alive, I'm a Jott how could I kill him ? thanks for your kind reviews !

**Kimdirect**** :**ah ah I won't spoil anything, thanks !

**Lexan****: **You wasn't expecting that ? it was the goal lol thanks for your kinds reviews :-)

And believe my, there'll be a lot of cliff-anger MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA ! lol

* * *

More than three additional weeks melted away. Jean still remained the mere shadow of the one she had been even if her pregnancy was really helping her to carry on. She still didn't speak much, answering only when she was appealed to, but she did it in a faint voice.

In this beginning of October the weather was wet and everybody had stayed inside, busying oneself here and there in their way, some of them taking the opportunity to write to their family, the others for studying. Half the students were hanging about the living-room where Hank and the Professor were playing chess with Ororo watching on. In a corner, Logan was reading a journal, grumbling now and then, whereas Jean was half laid on one of the sofas and was reading a book the Professor had given her some days before.

Some minutes later, the telepath closed it and –after having waited a while in a seating position in order to not feel dizzy– got up. She was about to take one step forward when she felt something peculiar, something it had seemed to her to feel sometimes the previous days but, this time, she was sure of what it was, and the quietness reigning in the living-room made that her gasp didn't go unnoticed.

- "What ? What is it ?" her worried friends raised their heads to look at her.

All the glances had converged toward her, but she seemed to be like in a sort of trance and had put her hands on her abdomen, a smile –the most beautiful since weeks– lightening her face:

- "I…I've felt him move, he has just given me a kick, he…" she answered before her glance became gloomy and her smile disappeared.

She turned her head away by slightly biting her lower lips and went out of the room.

- "Jean, wait !" made Ororo, perplexed by this sudden change of mood as the previous instant her best friend was wearing a smile.

The Weather Witch got up but Logan held her back:

- "No, let her Ororo, I think she needs to be alone"

- "But…"

- "He's right Storm" nodded the Professor.

One of the students, of almost nine years old, arrived recently and having witnessed the scene, asked:

- "Why she has left ?"

Charles gave her a conciliating smile and declared:

- "You know Annie, when a couple is expecting a baby, they particularly share some moments. Your mommy by example has probably made your daddy feel the first kicks you gave her by putting his hand on her abdomen" he explained in a soft voice "And Jean…Jean can't share these moments with the father of her baby and this is really hard for her, do you understand ?"

The little girl nodded before frowning.

- "But why she didn't stay ? We could have consoled her"

The Professor, sensitive in front of her innocence, gave her another smile.

- "Sometimes the adults need some times alone to themselves."

Annie seemed to be partially convinced by this explanation and returned her attention toward the drawing which had busied her until now. The Professor sighed before lowering again his mental-shields which access was allowing him to feel Jean' sorrow. He knew she had gone out to the edge of the lake, but he had to restrain himself to join her and to let her her implicit will to stay alone.

* * *

The great reception-room was never so filled than for the annual parent-professor meeting in mid-October. Of course, most of the students had not kept contact with their parents –most of them having been rejected upon the discovery of their mutation–, but, for the ones whose families had stayed united, it was important to maintain confident-terms and this day was particularly lending itself to it. Despite all, all the students were invited to assist at this little reception and no one was missing at the appeal even if it was just for savouring the meals of the buffet.

A hubbub was filling the room, the brothers and sisters of the students were running about everywhere, some little groups had formed themselves around the buffet spread. Everybody had paid attention to their clothes, overall as regard the students' members of families. Jean had agreed to be present and had also tried to make an effort on her appearance. She had slipped on a long woollen maternity-dress Ororo had given her some days before, and had tied her hair in a chignon. Around five months pregnant, she couldn't hide her abdomen anymore overall that the sock-dress was fitting her exactly. Haired and dresses like it, she was lovely, but her glance −underlined by the rings under her eyes as a result of a lack of sleep due to the nightmares and the baby's kicks− were betraying the wound of her heart that was still present.

Since the beginning of the reception, Jean had received condolences from most of the students'parents and Kitty's mother didn't make an exception when she came to speak to her.

- "Doctor Grey, I've learned about professor Summers and I offer my sincerest sympathies"

- "Thank you madam Pryde"

Like previously, Ororo –being nearby with other guests– became imperceptibly taut at these words, fearing this could shaken her friend; but despite it being the sixth time that sympathies were offered to her, she managed to hold it together and to lack skin deep-emotions. So, the Weather Witch resumed her conversation with Samuel's parents and it's only a quarter of an hour later that she saw the young telepath moving hastily off.

- "Excuse me" she pardoned herself from the people she was speaking to before going after Jean, but Professor Xavier stopped her on the way, answering to her implicit question at the same time.

- "I think that the fact of seeing Jubilee's sister pregnant with her husband cuddling her, must have overwhelmed her" he said by indicating to her the couple chatting with Hank.

Storm looked at this direction and saw what he was talking about.

- "Oh no…" she made "I'm gonna see her"

- "No, leave it, I will take care of it" he said before steering his wheelchair toward the room's exit.

He quickly found himself in the quietness again.

- "Jean ?" he called by going over the corridor.

Passing in front of one of the common-room, he heard a chocked back sob and steered his wheelchair on his left.

- "Jean ?"

He glanced over the room and ended by finding her, sat against the wall, a hand on her abdomen, her knees folded as a support for one of her elbow as she was holding her forehead with her right hand.

R&R please, the more I get, the sooner I'll update (even if here my computer will go to the doctor ggrrrrr)


	15. part 15

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

In front of so much reviews I couldn't refuse to update !, I notice I have a lot of review when the update is long to come…but I'm happy to have my computer again

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed, Aimtbj, Lexan,Slicky**, **and Kim direct :

**Slicky :**MUHAHAHAHA you fall in the trap lol****

And believe my, there'll be a lot of cliff-anger MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA ! lol

* * *

On hearing the Professor arriving, the young woman raised her face streaming with tears at him.

- "…I…I'm sorry…I couldn't…"

- "I know Jean "he answered, coming closer to her "You don't have to apologize"

This didn't settle down her tears. Damned wheelchair and damned legs ! He'd love so much to be able to hold her against him like a father would've done, but he couldn't.

- "When I think I have insisted myself in order to make you agree to assist to this reception" said Charles "If I had known there would be a couple of future parents, I would have prepared you to it"

Jean slowly shook her head.

- "…No, it's up to me to bear it…I've to learn to accept this kind of things…but it's so hard…Scott…"

- "Yes, Scott would have loved to be near you, he would have given everything to accompany the pregnancy of your child, but the fate has wanted something else" made Charles in a voice filled of compassion "You will learn again how to live Jean, I know it."

He smiled at her and put a hand on her shoulder. She looked at him and softly nodded without real conviction before she was slightly startled and changed her hand of place on her abdomen by giving the wan ghost of a smile.

- "The baby has just given me another kick"

- "Can I… ? "

Jean understood immediately what he was asking and nodded by drying her tears.

- "Of course, wait…" she made by raising on her feet to sat down on a chair, at Charles' height "This'll be more comfortable for you like this" she said before taking the hand of the man she considered as her father since all these years, and putting it on her abdomen, where the last kick had been given.

Like if the baby knew he had an audience, he reproduced his little choreography and the Professor smiled widely when he felt it under his palm, like he had done the first time.

- "He moves a lot those days"

- "Yeah, overall during the night…" nodded Jean.

Wolverine made his appearance in the room.

- "Ah you're here; we're gonna leave for the walk around the park" he told before addressing a protective glance at Jean "ya'll be all right ? ya know, you're not obliged to…"

- "No, it'll be fine" she cut him "…I've to get used to it and I need to take him out now and then and let him hear the exterior sounds" she added, referring to her baby by stroking her abdomen.

Actually, she had also gone out during the previous week to accompany Hank and his zoological-class at the city's wildlife park, under Ororo's insistence who wanted absolutely to make her go out of the Institute for a while; but they knew she had only said that as a pretext to her own motivation, all she did since Scott's death, she did it for her future child.

* * *

This week, Jean wasn't well. It's bound to say that the previous week, the one which had followed the reception, had been rich in difficult events for the young woman and her moral had been affected by it. At first, there had had the day where Scott's birthday should've taken place; this day, Jean had stayed in her bedroom and remained relatively silent during the following ones. Three days later, as emotionally Jean already wasn't set fair, a new plane-crash happened in the same State than the one having cost Scott's life and she _had_ to be in the room when the flash-info had been broadcasted on TV, without forgetting to recall the flight _TCA2413_'s crash and to show pictures again. Jean's reaction had been immediate and having said that, Logan and Ororo had even feared that she'd faint as much she had turned pale before beginning to tremble. They had hastened to switch off the set and to help the young woman to sit down to recover from her emotions.

The nights which were melting away henceforth were only a succession of nightmares and it was rare that Jean fell asleep for a peaceful sleep. An evening, at the beginning of this week, the professors and the students were gathered together in one of the common-rooms to watch a movie. The number of armchairs and sofas was plentiful, and Jean laid down on one of the couch, letting herself be soothed by the ambient sounds.

When the TV program ended, Ororo signalled to the others not to make any noise, indicating the sleeping young woman by a move of her head. The students wished them good-night in a deep voice and went to bed, leaving the professors in a dilemma:

- "What do we do ?" asked Logan "Should I carry her to her bedroom ?"

Professor Xavier shook his head.

- "No, this would wake her. We will let her sleep here, this sofa is comfortable and this time she's not having bad dreams" he said after having slightly brushed Jean's mind.

- "All right" approved Storm by coming closer for softly laying a cover on her best friend, the woollen blanket fitting the maternal figure of the young woman.

All of them left the room to go to bed at their turn.

Some hours later, Logan got up in the middle of the night to have a beer and make his usual inspection and, with his hyper-sensitive hearing, it wasn't long before he was informed that Jean was no longer sleeping peacefully. When he entered in the room, he discovered a telepath trembling and moaning in her sleep, the cover had fallen onto the ground a long time ago; he went up to wake her up, but hadn't had the time to.

- "SCOTT !!"

Jean woke up with a start, panting. She put her hands on her belly, letting the other slide on her face like to chase these images away. Seeming shaken, she pivoted to find herself sat, her back against the sofa, her kneels pulled back against herself.

- "You're gonna be fine ?"

Jean startled upon hearing Logan's voice, she hadn't noticed him, and as a matter of fact, it's only now that she realised she wasn't in her bedroom.

- "Hey, it's just me" made Wolverine in one of his softest tone before repeating "You're gonna be fine ?"

- "Have I really a choice…?" answered Jean without hardness before shutting her eyes and sighing deeply.

- "Another nightmare about Scott ?" asked Logan by sitting on the edge of the sofa.

Jean slightly nodded and swept away a tear which had forced its way down one of her cheeks. Logan put an arm around her shoulders and softly drew her closer, Jean didn't resist and put her head on his shoulder, keeping her eyes fixed into space. She knew he wasn't the kind who showed his affection, even for her who had achieved to soften his bad temper since she came to the Institute some fifteen years before, as she only was a little girl. Since, she had grown up and had become a woman who will become a mother in some months, he had remained the same as much physically than inwardly.

Logan said nothing for a while, before ending by asking:

- "Do ya want to talk about it ?"

- "No"

- "Do ya want a glass of water or somethin' else ?"

This time she agreed, Logan nodded and got up to go and fetch the drink as Jean was retrieving the cover by telekinesis and wrapping herself in it, stroking her belly, the glance sad.

R&R please, the more I get, the sooner I'll update.


	16. part 16

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed, Aimtbj, Turkee, Lexan,Slicky:

**Turkee**** :**yeah, I knew that by letting you think that Scott was really dead I was risking to lose readers, but I've taken the risk :-) Thanks for the review !

**Slicky**** :** I've the feeling that we have exchanged our roles lol ("Yeah! You updated!" that's remind me me for your fic, I'm commenting lol)

And for the ones who are too curious, you'll see, what will happen, you're only at the middle of the fic…); believe my, there'll be a lot of cliff-anger MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA ! lol

* * *

****

But the nightmares became more and more violent in the course of the week and this time, it had been Ororo who particularly witnessed it…

_Jean was in a plane, a plane which she was beginning to know too well, the kind of plane Scott might have taken. She knew what would happen, she was too well accustomed to, these last days, when the nightmares had come to replace the peaceful dreams in which the young woman was looking for refuge until now. Already, an agitation was reigning in the cabin, Jean was suspecting that all will turn in a tragedy, but she couldn't help it and scan with her eyes the passengers. In an instant her glance fell ineluctably on a young man with ruby-red sunglasses. Like the other times, this vision wringed her heart and she felt herself overwhelmed by thousands of emotions at the same time, she wanted to run to him, but something was preventing her from doing it, she stood rooted to the spot and couldn't join him. Seeing it was useless to struggle against the invisible strength which was holding her back, she tried to warn him:_

- _"Scott !! Scott !! The plane will crash !! Scott, I beg you !" she called him ; but he didn't seem to hear her._

_She tried to use their bond, but unsuccessfully, she seemed to be devoid of her mutant powers despite all her attempts. Suddenly, a violent jerk shook the air-craft and, when she looked back at Scott, a vision of horror stroke her : the body of the man she loved had just caught fire, he was yelling her name in heartrending calls, she felt him suffering right up to her entrails, but she couldn't do anything, she couldn't do anything !!_

- "NO SCOTT !!!!!" shouted Jean by waking in a start.

She only had the time to realise she wasn't resting on her mattress, but was levitating above it, that she felt heavily on it. She was covered by cold sweat and had the feeling to be winded. Like the previous nights, she took some instants to know where she was, to realise that this perpetual nightmare had its part of reality, that the bed remained empty of Scott's presence and will forever be.

Quickly, these terrible images rose again in her mind, she felt a wave of despair seize her and she burst in tears taking a curled-up on herself position. She felt her son move and kick her, he might have felt his mother's distress and this had awoken him; despite that, Jean didn't manage to settle down.

The door burst opened on Ororo wearing a dressing gown hastily passed on her shoulders.

- "Jean !! "

Curiously the Weather Witch had also her eyes reddened by tears as she had just sat down near her best friend and was beginning to softly speak to her and stroking her hair in attempt to calm her. But the telepath was so broken that her sobs didn't weaken.

Another person burst in the room:

- "Another nightmare ?" asked Logan with his hair in disorder.

- "Yes, it was horrible" answered Ororo before explaining herself "I've seen some scraps, she's projected, surely unconsciously"

- "As far as I'm concerned, I've seen nothin', I was in the kitchen"

Storm implicitly asked him with a glance how he had known.

- "I've heard her, ya know I've a particularly sensitive hearin' " made Logan before casting a glance in the room where books and curios were covering the ground "Seein' the state of the room, I can well believe ya as for the level of the nightmare…"

Storm sadly nodded. She hadn't stopped stroking her best friend's hair and began to softly speak to her to try to appease her:

- "There there, it was only a nightmare, settle down…"

Logan had also came closer, overwhelmed to see his protégée in such a distress.

- "Maybe we should inform the Professor ?"

- "He already knows about it, he wanted to come but I've told him I'd take care of it"

Jean's cries were beginning to quieten down, but now it was these terrible images which were coming back, Scott in fire, his pain, his calls…

- "…I…I don't feel well…" she articulated.

Storm understood immediately the reasons of it, she was feeling herself nauseous because of the only scraps she had seen.

- "Logan ?"

Wolverine nodded and helped her to lead Jean at the toilets, not wanting her to fall in her state.

When they had brought her back to her bed, Storm covered a shivering telepath with her duvet and sat down at the edge.

- "…I…I should've been with him…" Jean articulated "…he wanted me to come but I refused…because of a stupid blood-analysis…"

Storm shook her head, she knew just too well that Jean still couldn't recover from the fact she hadn't agreed to go with Scott.

- "No Jean, you know we've yet talked about it, you wanted to let him spend some time alone with his brother, you even told me that Scott had told you the same on the phone from Hawaii" replied Storm before adding "You cannot change the past Jean"

Jean answered nothing, stroking her belly mechanically. The past she'd wanted so much to change it, to prevent Scott from taking the plane, to announce to him she was pregnant and to see his face lighten, to feel his joy thought their bond, to share everything with him; yes, she'd give everything to change the past in order to he be near her today…but it was impossible…

It's Wolverine's voice which brought her back to the reality :

- "Come on, ya need to try to relax yerself, you're gonna go back to sleep…"

The young woman slowly shook her head, some tears resuming their course on her cheeks:

- "…no…I don't want to sleep anymore…no more…" she made in a faint voice still marked by the emotion "…before, I…I found him again in my dreams, everything was as before, nothing had happened, we were still together…now…I don't stop doing nightmares where I find him to lose him again, where I see him die in atrocious suffering…I… I can't bear it anymore, I don't want to see it ever again…"

- "Red, you're exhausted, the baby you're carryin' need ya to sleep" argued Logan by coming closer of the bed, knowing that using the well-being of her child could only convince her.

_How the things are doing ?_ asked the Professor by telepathy.

_I think this time she's not gonna fall back to sleep _thought Storm in order to let Charles seize her thoughts _And it seems to me that's she's perfectly able to prevent herself from sleeping with her telepathy, can't she ?_

_Yes…I send Hank to you, he must have something to help her_

Ororo went out of '_her thoughts_' to see that Logan had sat down near Jean and was speaking to her in a protective tone. For a while, this reminded her some moments when she, Jean and Scott were the only ones students of the Institute and that Wolverine and the Professor acted as paternal figures. She stayed silent some minutes until Hank appeared.

- "Oh man…"he made by seeing the disorder.

Storm got up and went to meet him, letting Logan be alone with Jean for some instants; after all, maybe he'd achieve to settle her down enough in order to make her agree to let the slumber wrap her again.

- "The Professor's psychic-protection hasn't been strong enough" explained Storm in a deep voice before adding "It had already happened when we were young that Jean needs so much to use her powers in a nightmare that they revealed themselves in the reality, but this had never happened again since the installation of the Professor's protections"

- "So how…?" asked Hank

- "It was particularly horrible" murmured Storm "I dunno if I had been the only one, but I saw a part of her nightmare; in it Scott was burnt alive…"

- "Oh my god…"

- "Yes, it's worse and worse, she hasn't even wanted to talk to me about the last few" nodded Storm, looking sad.

- "And of course, she's afraid to fall back to sleep…"

- "Yes…do you have something ?"

- "I've had to look for a sedative enough strong which can be compatible with her pregnancy, but I've found it" he made by entering the room, pulling out the syringe he had brought with him.

R&R please, the more I get, the sooner I'll update.


	17. part 17

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Tootsee, slicky and Aimtbj

and I'm looking forwawrd to your reaction....I dunno when I'll update again...

* * *

- "I've had to look for a sedative enough strong which can be compatible with her pregnancy, but I've found it" he made by entering the room, pulling out the syringe he had brought with him.

Jean noticed it quickly and asked in a suspicious voice:

- "…what is it …?"

- "Atarax" answered Hank, knowing perfectly that the doctor she was knew already its properties.

Seeing that Jean didn't seem to be opposed to it, Beast came closer to her, denuded one of her forearms and proceeded with softness at the injection.

- "Relax yourself now" he said at her in an appeasing tone by massaging her arm during some instants.

Jean murmured a last time that she wanted to fall in a dreamless sleep before shutting her eyes, feeling herself being seized by a woolly wave.

- "She'll sleep for about a dozen of hours" made Hank once the young woman's breath had taken a slow and regular rhythm.

Ororo shook her head:

- "Poor Jean, these nightmares don't leave her anymore…"

- "What's worryin' me the most is that, some days ago she's started to eat almost anythin' again and with her pregnancy…" said Logan.

Hank made a negative sign of the hand:

- "She perfectly knows the baby won't suffer from it given that he'll draw what he needs even if this is to the detriment of his mother…" he made notice before declaring "Well, I think we can go back to sleep."

- "As far as I'm concerned, I won't be able to find the sleep after what I've seen" declared Ororo before looking at her watch "It's 4.30 a.m., I'm gonna have a coffee and watch a movie, if anyone wants to join me ??…" she purposed.

Logan joined her as Hank was casting a last glance at Jean before going out of the room at his turn with the intention of coming back to check the young woman's state at several times just as a precaution.

* * *

Three days later, taking advantage of a fresh and powdery snowfall the previous night and of a clear and agreeable morning, the Institute's young mutants were enjoying themselves to their heart's content. The frost had begun to freeze the lake but not enough to allow them to practice ice-skate in all security ; so, Storm and Iceman had forced their hand at nature for the greatest pleasure of all.

Sitting on one of the low wall bordering the principal exterior stairs, Jean and Rogue were drinking hot chocolate and watching the festivities with more or less interest.

- "Hey Bobby ! Aren't you taking a little too much advantage of the situation here ?" sent Tabitha at Icemen who was using his powers here and there.

Rogue laughed when her boyfriend replied by throwing an enormous snow-ball to Boom-Boom who riposted by sending back some of her explosive bombs. A little further on, Jamie was gliding by sledge on an artificial slope made of ice recovered by snow but, negotiating badly his turn, he crashed head-on into a snow-man which all his clones –accidentally set free by the shock– hastened to re-make in front of Amara's and Kitty's menacing looks. Rogue laughed again in front of the scene but cut herself when she saw Jean startle and put her hands on her abdomen in a different way that the one provoked by a particularly strong kick of the baby.

- "Doctor Grey ? Are ya all right ?"

- "…I…I don't know…" she answered, pensive.

She had just felt like a sort of contraction or at least a hardening of the lower-abdomen stronger than the ones which came sometimes with a pregnancy. Seeing that this didn't seem to happen again, she said:

- "…It's over; I believe I'll go back in…"

- "You're gonna be alright ?"

- "…Yes, don't worry Rogue…"

Jean got up, but hadn't even made three steps that a searing pain took her again. Under its influence, she released her cup –which liquid went to spill in the snow which melted in some thousandth of seconds– and plastered her two hands on her abdomen, shutting her eyes and clenching her teeth in order to not screaming; but the pain didn't go away and forced her to doubled up, falling on her knees in the snow, moaning.

- "Doctor Grey ??!" panicked Rogue.

The young mutant had hardly the time to get up when Jean collapsed on the ground, unconscious.

- "Help !!! Doctor McCoy !!!" cried out Rogue running to the telepath' side.

Beast heard the calls and arrived in some jumps, a crowd had hovered around Jean's unconscious body.

- "Move aside" he ordered before seeing that the young woman had collapsed on the ground "Oh, my stars and garters, what happened ?" he asked as he was hurrying near Jean.

Storm quickly joined them and forced back the students for letting some place to Hank while casting worried glances toward her friend.

- "I dunno, she's seemed to feel something at her abdomen, but she's said that she was better. She's wanted to go back in, when she raised herself she suddenly doubled up in pain, and collapsed on the ground even before I could've reacted!" explained Rogue in a voice speeded up by the anxiety. "What's the matter with her ? She's all right, I hope ?"

Hank had leaned in to check her vital signs, the face concentrated.

- "I don't know yet" he answered before rolling up Jean's pull-over in order to palpate a little her abdomen, rounded by five and a half months of pregnancy.

- "She's bleeding !" Rogue cried out suddenly.

As a matter of fact, the snow was beginning to turn red between the young woman's legs. If he hadn't been recovered by a blue fur, Beast would've turned white without a doubt.

- "Oh no !!" he gasped "I must bring her to the med-bay immediately !!"

* * *

Storm, Wolverine and the Professor were waiting behind the door of the infirmary.

Rogue had wished to stay too, but they've asked her to keep an eye on the others students with Bobby.

After a solid hour, Hank went out and declared, the face serious, shaking the head in despair.

- "I could not do anything"

to be continued....

evil the cliff-hanger, isn't it ? MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

R&R please, the more I get, the sooner I'll update.


	18. part 18

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Aimtbj, Lexan, Slicky and Jeannie Darko!

* * *

****

- "I could not do anything"

Storm clasped her hand to her mouth by letting herself sank on a chair.

- "Oh no…not this…"

- "For cryin'out loud !!" swore Logan.

- "How is she ? Have you informed her yet ?" asked the Professor, dismayed.

- "No, she's still under the effect of the anaesthesia" began Hank before going of by answering at Charles' first question. "Physically, I've done what was needed in order so the miscarriage doesn't provoke an infection, she'll be able to conceive again. Emotionally, we've to wait her to wake up to know it, but it'll be terrible without any doubt"

- "But what happened ?" asked Logan in a voice marked by the sorrow but also by a certain anger against the fate pursuing Jean relentlessly "I believed there were almost no risk after the third month of pregnancy"

- "Yes '_almost'_" insisted Hank "Honestly, I don't know what has provoked this miscarriage, I'll carry out some new analysis, but…the foetus was well"

- "Oh my god, he was alive…" realised Ororo by reading Beast's expression.

- "Yes, he has survived some minutes. I've well tried to keep him alive, but at this stage he wasn't viable, even if it was already a baby in miniature" sighed Doctor Mc Coy.

- "You have done all you could Hank, and you know it" made the Professor by sensing his feelings.

Beast nodded and let some instants of silence pass before resuming:

- "Jean's last analysis was good, but we should not underestimate the influence of the emotional in all this…" he explained "These last two weeks, Jean has had some difficult moments and particularly these last days ; but, given this pregnancy had gone normally despite the tragedy of Scott's death, there were every indications that it'd go at its term…Everything went really quickly, I think Jean hasn't even had signs letting foreseeing it because, as a doctor, she could've decode them ; and this even, I guess, if it was a single pregnancy, the first one fathered by two mutants"

A heavy silence settled again, each one of them laying an upset glance on Jean who they could see by the chink of the door, laid on one of the beds, on a drip.

- "She was so much fastened to this baby, he was her support, she was beginning to slowly learn how to live again…" made Storm, tears in her eyes.

- "We know it Ororo, I think we have all felt the deep links she had created with him ; unfortunately, she will have to pass thought a terrible trial again…" declared Charles, as much shaken.

- "It remains to be seen if she's gonna accept it" grumbled Logan.

Behind them, Jean began to become agitated.

- "She's waking up" made Storm.

- "I'll speak to her" purposed Hank.

He left the three mutants where they were and rejoined the bed the young woman was stretched across. In order to give to himself some courage, he deeply sighed before encouraging her to wake up :

- "Jean ? Jean ? Do you hear me ?"

The young woman opened her eyes with difficulty. She saw blurred during some instants before seeing clearly again and needed a while to situate herself, ending by asking in a weakened voice:

- "What's happened…? Why am I here…?"

- "You don't remember ? Of what can you recall?" asked Hank by telling himself that it'd maybe be better if she'd understand it by herself.

Jean frowned slightly, raking obviously up in her recalls.

- "I…I was outside with Rogue and.." Jean cut herself, she had just remembered the pain which had torn her belly…her belly… "The baby !!??" she asked, fear in her eyes, by raising herself suddenly while putting her hands on her abdomen which revealed itself to be more flat than usual.

Hank hadn't had a choice anymore, he had to tell her. He swallowed his saliva and announced as tactful as possible:

- "I'm sorry Jean but…but you've had a miscarriage"

This glance, Beast will never forget it; the feeble light which had achieved to survive until now had just extinguished. It was as if the young woman had just been struck by a car such the news' impact was visible. She had just frozen, stopping almost to breath, under the shock.

- "…No…No…" she murmured, a haggard glance, her hands still pinned on her abdomen.

The scaffolding of life she had laboriously rebuilt had just broken down…no, it wasn't possible, it wasn't possible, she couldn't believe it, she didn't want to believe it, it wasn't possible, it wasn't possible…

Logan, Ororo and Professor Xavier came closer to her, this last one undertook to speak to her :

- "Jean, we want you to know that…"

- "Leave me alone…" she breathed, with determination in the voice, without even going out of the semblance of torpor where she had just fallen.

- "You…" tried Logan.

- "I'VE SAID LEAVE ME ALONE !!" cried out Jean with a sudden violence before making them move back by the strength of her telekinesis and bang the door in the same way, not letting them the time of reacting.

Finding themselves, the four of them, in front of a closed door, the Professor put his hands on his temple in order to try to enter with his protégée, but shook quickly his head.

- "All her mental-shields have been raised up ; she had barricaded herself as much physically than psychically, I absolutely can't access her mind"

R&R please, the more I get, the sooner I'll update.

Sorry Lexan, too soon for an early baby to survive


	19. part 19

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Aimtbj, Lexan, Slicky, Jean Grey Summers and Kim direct!

Remember, the more I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

****

- "It remains the video-surveillance for at least see what she's doin'" suggested Logan knowing very well that, even if he cut the door, Jean wouldn't let them come closer.

- "If she doesn't disconnect them" made Hank as they were going to the control-room, still under the shock of the news and their friend's reaction.

But Jean hadn't the head for that…she was staying like petrify, half-seated on the bed, as they had '_let'_ her, stroking mechanically her belly which, henceforth, wasn't carrying anything anymore. Staring into space, she remained without reaction for some minutes and then came back progressively to the reality.

- "…No…No….it's not possible…no…BUT WHY ???!!!!" she shouted suddenly by using her telekinesis to send violently two tables fly through the room, letting them crash against the wall in a din of crumpled sheet metal.

Having let escape this sudden bout of anger, the pain was freer to express itself and Jean burst in wailing sobs, curling up on herself, her powers making fall some objects and tremble the walls; but this time, the Professor couldn't do anything and, even in the contrary, it wouldn't be a good idea, Jean had to express herself.

Thousands of question were turning in her mind, feeding the floods of tears : Why ? Why the fate was pursuing her at this point ? What has she done to deserve that ? But why not killing her once for all to prevent her suffering ?? She was alone again, alone without nothing else to fasten to…this baby, she desired him, he was all it remained from Scott, her son, she had felt him move, she had seen him by scan ; he had yet his place in her heart, she had put in him all her love tempted to fill the emptiness provoked by the death of the man who represented all for her…

Gradually, the psychic-shield Jean had formed around the room weakened before disappearing, but the one of her mind was only strengthened. After about twenty minutes, exhausted by her emotions and the aftermath of the anaesthesia, Jean fell into a deep sleep.

* * *

Hank had settled Jean in one of the convalescence-room the day before she hadn't even woken up and it bounds to say that the sedative he had given to her was for something in it, she had to recuperate.

The next morning, Ororo gathered a bunch of flowers from her greenhouse and came with Logan and the Professor to Jean's room, expecting to find her in tears, demanding all their support.

Jean was awake for hours but she hadn't touched the food Hank had brought to her at dawn. Laid on her side, turning her back at the door, staring into space, she had the feeling to have nothing more, to be nothing more.

The telepath she was felt Logan, Ororo and Professor Xavier coming's a long time before hearing the rolling of the wheel-chair –and the two X-Men's footsteps– about to enter in the room.

- "Go away, I don't want to see anybody" she breathed without even making a move.

- "Don't reject us Jean…" tried Logan.

- "Clear off; don't force me to make you leave" she made in a harder voice, but still reflecting her emptiness interior she was feeling.

Ororo exchanged an upset look with Charles Xavier:

Jean

- "That's the same for you Professor ! It is for everybody; I don't want to see anybody"

Even if they had wanted to come closer to her, they couldn't have, she had formed a sort of shield preventing anyone to make more than two steps in the room. When Hank came, he found himself blocked too by the young woman telekinesis. Seeing his friends' looks, he understood quickly the situation but used a medical argument to try to make her give way because he didn't have a choice:

- "Jean, let me in, you know very well I've to examine you"

The mutant sighed and removed her shield. Knowing she agreed to see Beast only medically, Professor Xavier and the X-Men didn't attempt to go ahead.

- "If you need anything Jean…well, you know we're here…" made Ororo.

She didn't obtain any answer but knew her friend had heard her ; so, she gave her bunch of flowers to Hank who excused himself from them and waited for them to be out to close the door.

Beast carried out the necessary examinations and tried to engage the conversation several times but was unsuccessful, Jean was nothing more than a marble block.

- "You don't feel any pain in particular ?" he asked during the examination.

Jean turned her head toward him and darted him the first glance since the day before and this one had nothing of friendly, but rather of accusatory. Hank understood his mistake…

- "Yes…Excuse-me, I shouldn't have asked it like that…" Beast corrected himself "…I mean physical pain"

- "No" she answered before turning again her head away.

Hank pulled an upset face, he saw very well that Jean had entrenched herself in another world and that this wasn't turning out all right whereas he had thought the day before that she'd accept to receive some visits after having taken a rest. But at least, contrary to the others, he was here and tried to take advantage of it by passing the messages Logan and Ororo had partially expressed

- "Jean, it's a terrible trial that you've to go through again, but don't reject us, we can help you"

- "Help me ?…no, there's nothing you can do, there's nothing you can do " she answered in a dry voice but without raising the tone.

- "We're your friends Jean, we…"

- "I just want you to leave me alone"

Understanding the message, Hank ended his examinations and went out of the room after having put Ororo's flowers in a vase.

You like it ? so let me know it by reviewing please :-)


	20. part 20

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Aimtbj Lexan, Slicky, Jean Grey Summers and Kim direct!

Remember, the more I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

****

The second day of her convalescence, Jean spent it in her bedroom where she let in nobody and didn't go out once. She had drawn the curtains and stayed in half-darkness, laid on her bed, without even shutting her eyes.

* * *

The third day, she went out of her room at dawn, passed by the kitchen where she found a bit of bread which she ate without feeling hungry, and ventured in the snow-covered park without even paying attention to the frost which was reigning on it. She was somewhere else, she needed to walk, to walk without ever stopping, not meeting anybody anymore, that the others leave her alone and never ask her anything anymore.

Some twenty minutes later, Ororo made her way to the kitchen and began to cook before Rahne and Amara entered.

- "Well slept ?" asked the Weather Witch.

Amara shrugged and Rahne, seeing Jean wasn't in the kitchen as she used to be the previous weeks, asked :

- "Doctor Grey still hasn't left her room ?"

- "No" answered Storm in an upset voice

- "It's really unfair what's happened to her" complained Rahne, the Professor Xavier having informed them about the news.

- "And this time Jean seems to have completely cut herself of the world, no one of them has achieved to talk to her, nor to approach her" declared Ororo by speaking about the professors before adding "Well, except for Hank, but only for medicals reasons"

Amara grabbed an orange without great conviction.

- "She and professor Summers, they represented something really important for most of us " she made by referring to the others students "They were giving the proof that we could be mutants and know about love, that we weren't condemned to live alone ; well, we aren't alone here, but you see what I mean"

- "Yes, I understand Amara" answered Storm "They were two true soul-mates, but this symbol must not disappear even if their fate has separated them"

The two young mutants nodded and Storm turned to the coffee-maker when her glance was attracted to the exterior by a red colour she knew well, Jean was about to climb the stairs leading to the hall.

- " But what the…?" Ororo replaced the coffee pot to meet the telepath under the incomprehensive glance of the two students who discreetly followed her.

When Storm saw that Jean was reddened by the cold and that snow was covering her pull-over, she couldn't believe her eyes.

- "But for heaven's sake Jean, what were you doing outside in the cold ? Alone, in your state and without even a coat !" she became indignant before couldn't help but wanting to take care of her "You're completely frozen, come and warm yourself by the fireplace, I'll bring you some coffee" she purposed by taking her by the arm.

But Jean didn't move:

- "Release-me" she made by freeing herself "I don't need to warm up, I'm not cold"

- "But Jean, you…"

- "I don't need it, is that clear ?!" she retorted with more ardour before turning over, to cross the hall and to begin to climb up the stairs which Logan was just descending.

He was surprised to see his protégée out of her room and, although he had just heard the shouts, couldn't help to think it was a good sign.

- "I…"

- "LEAVE ME ALONE !! " inveighed Jean without even stopping, the panes of the hall growled, letting supposed that a wave of telekinesis had just gone through it.

Logan froze and exchanged a glance with Storm before going down to join her, noticing Rahne and Amara who had just cast a glance in the hall.

- "What happened ?" he asked.

- "Nothing, she was outside, whereas I believed she was still locked in her room, she's come back completely frozen and I wanted to take care of her but…"

- "She's sent ya packin'…" summarized Logan

- "Yes, she's worrying me Logan, she rejects everything and that doesn't seem to turn out all right"

- "We've to give her some time and at least here she seems to tackle to the life in a way" made notice the mutant.

Jean, on her part, had entered her bedroom and was trying to settle herself down under a hot-shower, but to see her body devoid of her maternal-roundness she had seen evolve week after week, was preventing her of it; having said that, the tears didn't come, Jean had the feeling to have cried so much she couldn't cry anymore. She hadn't slept, ate almost nothing, but she wasn't feeling tired, on the contrary, she was feeling irritated, she was feeling angry, an anger against who ? she hadn't got a clue, against everybody and nobody given that it wasn't anyone's fault except her own misfortune.

She went out of the shower and wrapped herself in a bath-robe before returning to her bed, getting lost in the picture of her and Scott on her bed-side table. On the ground, was the video of the scans which tape she had unrolled and torn.

* * *

The two days which followed, Jean wasn't more agreeable than the previous ones. She got out of her room occasionally, but she didn't let herself being approached for all that and several people had to endure her mood, even if it was directed toward the professors, being the only ones who dared to try to break the ice again and again.

At a moment, at the crack of dawn, when Kurt and Kitty were crossing through one of the common-rooms with a view to get dressed to go out, they were surprised to pass Jean with a cigar in her mouth, not yet lit. Concerned, they informed Hank, when they passed him :

- "Doctor McCoy, I…" began the elf before taking the things differently "Is it prudent for the doctor Grey to smoke after what had happened to her ?"

Hank opened wide eyes :

- "Who ? Jean ? You saw her smoking ?"

- "Yes, we've like just passed her" confirmed Kitty "Apparently, she had like one of Mr Logan's cigars"

You like it ? so let me know it by reviewing please :-)


	21. part 21

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Lexan, Slicky, Mrs. Jean Grey-Summers, Kim direct and Oceanbang !

Remember, the more I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

****

- "Thanks for having informed me kids" declared Hank before leaving to make his little investigation and to inform the Professor Xavier about it.

Hearing Beast's report, Charles went in search of Logan, who he found not long after in the kitchen, sipping a beer.

- "Logan" the Professor came closer to him "Hank has just told me that some students have seen Jean smoking one of your cigars…"

- "What ??" Wolverine exclaimed, nearly choking on his gulp of beer.

- "He has made his little investigation and it so happens that others students have seen you give her one and let her go without protesting"

- "I haven't…Charles, ya know I'd not let her…" he defended himself.

- "Yes, I know Logan" the Professor reassured him "That's why I would want to probe your mind…"

- "Right" agreed Wolverine by sitting down.

The Professor came closer to him, putting his hands on the periphery of the mutant' skull and shut his eyes. It was not long before he opened them again :

- "I knew it !" he exclaimed "Jean has used her telepathic-powers on you, she has influenced your decisions and has erased this from your memory"

- "What ? " Logan was astonished, he knew she was able to do these kinds of things since some months, but had never observed its efficiency.

- "She's going too far, I need to have a talk with her" resumed the Professor with seriousness.

- "There is a good chance it'll be a one-way conversation…" made notice Logan.

One hour later, the young woman was in Professor Xavier's office, standing up, turning her back at him, looking out of the window.

- "Jean" made Charles in a calm and level-headed tone, knowing she was rather tensed "I know what you have done and I…"

- "You disapprove that, yeah I know" she cut him "But Logan wouldn't have given me one by himself, no more would the others"

- "You have just had a miscarriage Jean, you are not the kind of people to smoke and moreover you have always hated the odour of tobacco" resumed Charles "I know you're hurt, but…"

The young woman cut him again, her mood beginning to raise :

- "How can you know ? Don't tell me you understand me ! you can't ! That's my life, that's my body, so leave me be !"

- "Jean…"

- "No !!" she shouted by pacing the room.

Some objects began to shake because of Jean's kinetic-energy whose mutation had evolved since the liberty-Island incident. The Professor saw that the situation was getting out of hand :

- "Settle down Jean !…"

- "Leave me alone !" she shouted again " The conversation is over !!"

Jean left the room by banging the door behind her, leaving a Professor Xavier sighing :

- "And she's less aggressive with me, said Logan…"

* * *

But nothing was preventing it, the young woman was rejecting them without even letting them have the chance to express themselves plainly; and Ororo knew something about that because this time, it was her turn to deal with it:

- "Jean, I know you don't want to hear anything, but you've almost ate nothing since two days and…"

- "So what ? It's none of your damn business !!" Jean answered venomously, walking to the corridor in a pressed pace, without even stopping to listen to Storm.

- "Jean, we're worried for you, we…"

- "I've asked nothing from you so I owe you nothing !"

- "That's not what I meant…Jean do you want well to stop for two minutes ??!!" ended by yelling Ororo.

- "Why ? for giving me the usual verse so I can listen to you telling me how to live my life ?No thanks !!"

Two students stepped aside as a precaution when she passed.

- "Excuse her" breathed Ororo.

- " '_Excuse her_' ??? But what right have you…!!??"

The frames started to vibrate on the wall, Jean's anger was again triggering her telekinesis.

- "I don't even want to know !!" she said by leaving for the stables.

- "Jean, what are you doing ? Where are you going ?" Storm stopped her.

You like it ? so let me know it by reviewing please :-)


	22. part 22

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Lexan, Slicky and Aimtbj!

Remember, the more I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

****

- "Jean, what are you doing ? Where are you going ?" Storm stopped her.

As the previous times, the mutant darted her a bad glance again.

- "I do what I want and don't have to justify myself !!"

She went along the stalls until she found one with a horse still saddled. Outside, the snow was partially melted but the horses had been shoed accordingly. Jean was a good rider but this wasn't enough to convince Ororo.

- "I can't let you do this Jean" she declared by putting herself at the stall's exit while her friend was re-girthing the saddle.

- "I don't need your advice!" Jean yelled by detaching the animal before making it go back, it's when she saw the Weather Witch's position "Let me through !!"

The horse held up its neck abruptly at Jean's intonation of voice, the others seemed just as nervous, which wasn't for reassuring Ororo. Seeing she wasn't moving, Jean hustled her and went out of the stable, the bridle in her hand.

- "Jean, that's not wise in your state, you…"

- "Don't tell me what I can and cannot do !!" answered the telepath before getting on the horse again and shouting : "But for crying out loud stop bugging me !!"

- "Jean !!…Oh it's not true !!" raged Storm as her friend has just started her horse off at full gallop.

- "Do you want us to follow her ?" asked Samuel and Roberto who had prudently kept themselves apart.

Storm gave it some though but answered :

- "No, she would resist even more and this could provoke an accident; Moreover, we'd rather you not approach her when she's in this mood"

The two students complied and unsaddled theirs horses while Ororo was going up to the Institute.

- "I've heard shouting, what happened ?" asked Hank.

- "Jean has run away again, she took a horse, I couldn't stop her from doing it""

- "Nobody could've Ororo, she listens to nobody ; the Professor'll locate her and make sure she's not in danger" he purposed "Then, we'll leave her alone until she settles down and we'll fetch her"

- "Fetch who ?" asked Logan by entering in the room, a toothpick in his mouth.

- "Jean, she threw a fit"

- "She's a real time-bomb since her miscarriage…what has she done ?" he grumbled.

- "She's ran off" answered Hank.

- "Where ?"

Storm shrugged.

- "Hey, do you know Doctor Grey has…" began Bobby by entering in the room at his turn.

- "Yes, we know" answered Hank "Well, I'll inform the Professor."

Once he knew, Charles Xavier concentrated to try to locate Jean by telepathy, but wasn't long before he re-opened his eyes and shook his head.

- " No, I can't find her, she's preventing me from doing it ; all her mental-shields are up, I will need Cerebro's help"

The three mutants followed him in the sub-basement and waited until the powerful telepath came out of the circular-room containing the machine.

- "So ?" asked Storm.

- "It hasn't been easy, she has completely cut herself from the world, I have never seen it" he made "her powers have evolved these last months, she has learned how to use them"

- "And…?" Logan got impatient.

- "At almost 2.5 miles from the Institute, she's still moving and seems to be skirting the lake."

- "Well, we'll give her five minutes and we'll go to fetch her" decided Logan.

As they had expected, it hadn't been easy to make the young woman come back and their troubles have not ended…

* * *

The next day, Jean disappeared again without having informed anybody and Logan and Hank were looking for her. They went to one of the common-rooms where some students were studying.

- "Bobby, have ya seen Jean ?"

- "Who ? Sharptooth ? No sorry"

- "Rogue ? Jubilee ? Rahne ? " resumed Logan.

- "No, not for hours " answered the young girls.

- "'_Sharptooth_' ?" asked Hank, being stayed on this appellation.

- "Yes, like the T-Rex in the cartoon '_The Land Before Time'_, it's the youngest who have nicknamed her" explained Iceman "You know, she begins to scare them ; after having seen what she was able to do unwillingly on the day of professor Summers' death, they don't even dare to imagine what she could do in her actual state"

Logan wasn't surprised at this revelation nor Hank, who asked:

- "Don't think she's aggressive gratuitously, she's suffering, she's gone through so much suffering that she needs to release this pain somehow or other. The tears aren't enough anymore; it remains to her only the anger and as we're in her immediate circle, she naturally lays all the blame on us, but she'll only do it verbally."

- "Yes, we know that" retorted Iceman "It's to the youngest and the new-recruits that you should say that"

- "We'll do it" made Logan "For the moment, we've to find her"

- "Jean has run away again ?" asked Storm who had just arrived in the room, her session being over.

- "Yes, it seems" grumbled Logan " It's to believe she's doin' that to make us mad; she's harder to control than all the Institute' students combined"

- "Anyway, all the cars are in the garage and I've seen Kitty, she's stayed in the stables all the morning and she hasn't seen her too" declared Hank.

- "We've to inform the Professor, only he'll be able to locate her"

_It's already done Storm, she's not really far, actually she's in the danger-room, I'm on my way _Charles informed them by telepathy.

- "Alone ? But she's crazy !" Logan became indignant as the three of them were leading for the sub-basements.

You like it ? so let me know it by reviewing please :-)


	23. part 23

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Lexan and Slicky !

Remember, the more I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

****

For one hour, Jean was unwinding on a simulation but this didn't seem to have settled her down enough judging from her reaction when the three mutants came to interrupt the program.

- "What now ?? I can't be alone for five minutes without you coming to put your nose into my business ? I don't need a chaperon nor your pity !! All I want it's that you leave me alone !!" she shouted before passing in front of them.

Logan, Storm and Beast exchanged a glance and followed her as she was heading to the training-room where all kind of equipments were at their reach for maintaining their form.

- 'The least ya could do is inform us so we don't let ya do a session alone, ya know very well that it's dangerous !" made Wolverine in an irrefutable tone as they arrived in the sport-room.

- "I can take care of myself !!"

- "We're beginning to doubt it Jean" admit Storm, waiting for the mutant's outburst.

Jean abruptly turned over.

- "I don't need your moral !!" she yelled as a wave of anger was beginning to give way of herself and that the room equipments' were dangerously starting to vibrate "Dammit ! Are you all deaf, or is it too hard to understand ?!!?!!"

A chair was suddenly sent smash against the wall.

- "Jean, settle down, you…" tried Hank.

- "I SETTLE DOWN IF I WANT TO !! I DIDN'T ASK YOU TO FOLLOW ME SO LEAVE ME ALONE !!" she shouted and sent the table crashing as did the chair.

- "That's enough Jean !" tried Ororo at her turn "We know that you're hurt, we understand what you feel but…"

- "How could you understand ??!!! Have you lost your soul-mate, the person who meant the world to you ??!! Have you felt his child grow and move inside you before losing him too ?? NO !! SO HOW COULD YOU SAY YOU UNDERSTAND ME ?? STOP TAKING ME FOR A FOOL AND STAY AWAY!!" she shouted by throwing out another chair telekinetically in her anger.

Unwinding herself, Jean inflicted the same fate upon other objects without no one could calm her down. Oh, she knew this wasn't really smart, but she couldn't help it, she needed to vent this excess rage which was going through her body and her mind or she'd end up exploding ; and it was crazy the easiness with which she was able to come off its hinges…

- "Jean, stop it for cryin'out loud !!" shouted Logan for the umpteenth time.

He was unsuccessful; a punching-ball had just torn out of the ground and prepared to turn around the mutant as if she was its centre of gravity, before crumpling up with the rest. Logan tried to go closer to her again, he didn't risk a lot thanks to his healing-power, but she didn't let him.

- "Jean…" tried another voice.

Wolverine turned toward the newcomer. Not having found the young woman in the danger room, the Professor Xavier had only had to follow the shouts to find them.

- "Charles, ya shouldn't come closer, it's dangerous" made Hank as Logan unsheathed his claws in the event of an object would take the Professor as a target.

- "She won't hurt me"

- "I'd not bet on it…" retorted Wolverine given the state in which Jean had put the room in.

- "I have confidence" answered Charles before speaking again at the young woman but this time by telepathy _Jean, stop it, control yourself_

- "GET OUT OF MY HEAD !!! LEAVE ME ALONE !!" she shouted against them.

She was beside of herself, but some tears have made their appearance; were they caused by the anger, the tiredness or the sorrow ? they didn't know.

- "All right, you give me no choice…" murmured the Professor by putting his fingers against his temples.

But Jean was so withdrawn, she had built such a barricade around of herself that this hadn't had the radical effect expected, because the telepath soon understood. She moaned slightly under the Professor's psychic-attack impact's her psychic-shield weakened, she moaned again by putting her hands to her head but in vain. Finally, she fell on her knees, then on her side, before ending by collapsing on the ground, unconscious.

Logan, Ororo and Beast sighed deeply. Wolverine was the first to approach the young woman. He pushed away the long red-hair which were covering her face.

- "I don't recognize her anymore, she's becomin' more and more uncontrollable"

- "She's suffering, it's her only way to protect herself Logan" made Charles.

- "But all the same, I'm worryin', I'm afraid she…"

- "That she lays the blame on someone physically ? No, here she could very well have attacked me –she had the capacities and the possibilities, overall with the anger prompting her– but she didn't do it, she has just be contented with defending herself" retorted the powerful telepath "The most serious is that she has barricaded herself so much that I had difficulty reaching her"

- "Some students are beginning to be scared of her" made Hank in a reflective tone "Bobby has said to us that the youngest have even given her a nickname: '_Sharpooth_'"

Ororo nodded :

- "Yes, Kurt and Samuel told me about that at the end of my session a few minutes ago"

Charles stayed pensive some instants before declaring in a deep voice:

- "I'll gather them and speak to them"

Logan took Jean in his arms and glanced over the room:

- "We'll have to remake the decor" he said before leaving the room to bring the young woman back to her bedroom while she was unconscious.

- "Yes, Jean has put her back into it" approved Hank.

- "I'll settle that on my return" answered the Professor Xavier, pivoting his wheelchair which he led toward the elevator, Storm and Hank on his heels.

- "Oh yes, your conference at Seattle" remembered Ororo "I'm not really reassured to see you set out over there alone"

- "I don't risk anything Storm ; and you have to stay here to take care of the students and to manage Jean, which won't be easy, unless she settles down suddenly"

* * *

But the two days which followed, Jean didn't settle down; admittedly, she didn't break anything else and spent almost all her time closed in her bedroom, but she didn't let anyone approach her for all that. Even the fact that it had started to snow again didn't make her go out of her den.

Logan and Storm were sat on the steps of the stairs leading to the entrance of the Institute, keeping an eye on the students.

- "She still hasn't eaten anything ?" asked Wolverine.

- "No, and what surprises me the most is that this doesn't seem to weaken her for all that"

- "She's too much cut of the world to realize it"

- "I don't even think she sleeps at night and what's worrying me is that she doesn't cry, at least, I'd know what to do in these cases."

Logan nodded, he was bewildered too to be rejected like it by Jean but they couldn't do anything more than waiting for her to calm down by herself.

You liked it ? so let me know it by reviewing please :-)


	24. part 24

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Mrs. Jean Grey-Summers, Lexan, Danae and Slicky****

(I had made a mistake and prepared the part which will come after this one….fortunately I've noticed it !)

Remember, the more I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

****

This evening, the students went to bed early for most of them, exhausted by their reckless snow-balls battles. At 9 p.m., Jean still hadn't come down, Ororo prepared a sandwich for her and ventured to bring it to her.

- "Jean ? Jean it's Ororo, I…I've brought something for you to eat, open me up please" asked the Weather Witch after having tapped unsuccessfully.

She tried again, but, again, no answer, not even a sound came from the room.

- "Jean ? "

She twisted the doorknob, but it had been locked. Logan, intrigued by Storm's calls, made his appearance.

- "Logan, I'm worried, she has locked the door and doesn't answer"

Wolverine refrained from doing a comment about the fact that she might just want to cut herself off, and that the possibility of worrying them should be the least of her worries, and tapped on the door at his turn:

- "Jean ? Jean ! Open the door ! "

Still no answer. Storm cast him a glance of the kind –_Didn't-I-say-so-?-_ but he contented himself by shrugging, there was no harm in trying after all. Having said that, this had gone on long enough:

- "Red, I warn you, if you don't answer or don't come to open the door, I'm gonna force it open !" he informed her before muttering after some time : "…Well, you leave me no the choice…"

In a fraction of seconds, Wolverine unsheathed his claws and it was only a matter of time before the lock was cut and he pushed down the door.

- "Jean ?"

The darkness reigned in the room –Thus far, nothing abnormal– but the most notable was the temperature, there wasn't more than 34°f. Storm switched on the light which revealed an empty room. The window was wide-opened, the mutant must've used her telekinesis to descend to the ground without risk.

- "And she's run away again…" muttered Logan.

He went to verify the bathroom while Ororo was made her way to the window. Unfortunately, the snow which was falling prevented her from seeing further than a few meters.

- "Jean ?!" she called.

No answer.

- "I think she does it on purpose" resumed Logan.

- "Even so, we've to find her and, without the Professor, this won't be as easy than the other times"

- "The Elf could've been useful, that's a pity he's gone to spend the week-end with his parents" noticed Wolverine "Well, most of the students have yet gone to bed –and given the reception Jean's gonna reserve for us when we find her, I rather she lays the blame on us, so we won't disturb them– but I've seen Bobby and Rogue in the living room"

- "Right, go and fetch them, I'll check in the control-room if I can see Jean thank to the video-surveillance, meet me here"

-------------------------

Jean had just gotten her breath back. She had run up to here until she was out of breath and was now kneeling in front of Scott's memorial for some twenty solid minutes. A thick layer of snow was covering her hair and her clothes, which were not adapted for a wintry nocturnal run, but she didn't care, this didn't matter anymore. She was frozen, but didn't even realise it, she wasn't even shivering anymore, she wasn't of this world, she didn't want it anymore. A picture of Scott and her was placed in front of the memorial, the tears were freely slipping down her cheeks which were reddened by the cold while she was talking to him as for explaining what she was about to do.

-------------------------

Storm had summoned up her powers for stopping the snowfall and lift the fog but Jean's footsteps had yet disappeared; having said that, the moonlight was reflected off the white-coat of pureness, the nocturnal visibility was excellent. Not having found the young woman at the Institute nor in its annexes, the little group had parted to search the vast park, calling her even knowing very well that she wouldn't answer them.

But, after searching for a long while, they were now gathered at there point of rendezvous, empty handed.

-------------------------

- "Scott, I…I've tried, but I can't anymore…I'm worn out, it's too hard…I've lost you, I've lost our baby…I haven't…I have no place in this world anymore…not without you…I'm living only to find you again…" she made in a broken voice "…what's the use of surviving at all costs…if, I do nothing else than thinking about you each second which melts away ?…I don't even sleep anymore, I don't find you in my dreams anymore…I don't find any good reason to live anymore Scott…I can't bury my head in the sand anymore…I can't live without you….the time melts away, but the pain doesn't fade, it only cuts a little more at my heart…I'd give everything I have to find you again…I'd give everything I am for us to be together again, and…and that's what I'll do…"

In her hands, she was holding a scalpel which she had stolen some days before. She watched it shine a while under the moonbeams, but nothing would make her change her mind ; as a matter of fact, she had made this decision some days ago, she was only waiting for the good moment . With determination, she firmly griped it before deeply gashing her wrist and forearm in several spots. The pain ? she didn't feel it anymore, she didn't feel anything anymore, the cold and the despair were occulting it mostly. Rapidly lukewarm blood flowed out of the wounds. Jean tried to repeat the act on the right side, but it was more difficult and she only had done one deep notch before her numbered fingers dropped the instrument which landed silently, muffled by the white blanket of snow recovering the ground.

She watched her work for a while. The blood was already covering her arms and was beginning to drip onto the snow, turning the immaculate whiteness a rosy pink. Jean smiled with melancholy; yet, she was feeling giddy:

- "You see…?…it's only a matter of time and we'll be together again…" she said slowly.

Too weak to stay kneeled longer, Jean slowly laid herself at the feet of Scott's memorial, murmured again some words –their picture against her– as she was emptied of her blood; and closed her eyes, waiting for death to fetch her at her turn…

* * *

A thousand miles from here, at the very time when Jean was slashing her wrists, Scott woke up with a start and received a flash of what had just happened; he felt the intensity oh her despair and the limitless love, the love which had pushed Jean into making this gesture. These sensations were so real that Scott didn't know what to thing anymore…And all of a sudden, all became clear, the weeks spent believing at Jean's death veiled before ending by disappear for letting the place at the truth. This fight against the brotherhood having cost Jean's life had never happened ! He couldn't explain from where were coming these mental-pictures which had masked what had really happened : the air crash ; he was alone aboard, Jean was in the secure Institute. But then, what had he just witnessed for him to feel such an anguish ? The blood…the blade…a stone monument…some bits of words…their picture…No !

- "Jean no, don't do this !!" he cried out without even having felt it come.

Forgetting his tiredness and the few contusion remaining from Magneto's last questioning (which ones were becoming rare, the Acolyte's chief beginning to get tired to obtain nothing from the young X-Men leader's), Scott stood up and pounded on the door.

- "Let me out !!! You know I'll never say anything to you !!! It's over Magneto !! I know the truth now !!"

Only the silence answered him, but he kept on setting upon the door which had never given way ; he had never wished so much to have his powers again, the ones he had cursed so often.

* * *

Simultaneously at the Institute, a student woke up with a start and received too a strange vision. But Bryan, the young mutant who had arrived some weeks before, was accustomed to this kind of things and these flashes had never been revealed founded on whatever. Having said that, this time, he was more disturbed than he'd have wanted to, the Doctor Grey was involved in it and he had also seen the man who had been shown to him in picture –and who was supposed to be dead– as well as others who he didn't know. Completely absurd, Bryan said to himself, before turning himself in his bed and fall back to sleep.

You liked it ? so let me know it by reviewing please :-), the more I get the faster I post…


	25. part 25

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Slicky,Aimtbj, Lexan and Tori H **!!**

**Slicky**** :** lol, even Nicholette wasn't aware of this, I said I wanted to write a scene where Jean would be found at Scott's memorial, but never talked about a suicide lol

**Aimtbj****: **thank you ! and their'll be an eviler cliff-hanger for this part believe me…

**Lexan****: **oh no no no, reviews come a lot when I wait a little Muahahahahaha

**Tori**** H: **this ending is even worst Muahahahahaha

Remember, the more reviews I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

****

- "So ?" asked Storm, ignoring the tragedy which had just happened.

- "We've searched everywhere !" made Bobby and Rogue.

- "But for cryin' out loud, where on earth cans she be ??" began to become irritable Logan.

- "Well, maybe we should return to the Institute, after all, she could very well have hidden from the cameras" suggested Iceman.

- "No, I've well verified" confirmed Storm "She's outside, somewhere, and this begins to worry me"

A silence settled itself, each one of them thinking of a place still unexplored.

- "Have ya been to Professor Summers' memorial ?" asked Rogue.

- "No, she hasn't gone here again since almost one and a half months and has a tendency to avoid the place" made Ororo " I've even purposed to her to go with her but unsuccessfully, she said he wasn't really there"

- "We haven't a lot of options in any case, it's the only place we haven't checked" made noticed Logan.

All of them agreed on this point and went in the memorial's direction, each one of them thinking of Jean's reaction when she'd see them arrive, knowing they'd without any doubt been attacked.

When they were at about thirty meters from the memorial, Logan stopped suddenly and sniffed the air.

- "What is it?" asked Ororo.

- "Blood, I smell the odour of blood" he made before sniffing again "It's strong and…and I smell Jean' scent too !"

- "Oh no…you think that…?" Storm stammered.

Nobody waited for an answer because all of them began to run, covering quickly the distance separating them from the memorial.

- "She's here !!" cried out Rogue by catching a glimpse of a shape laid at the monument feet.

- "Stay here !" ordered Logan, not wanting the young mutants to see the scene too close if it was yet too late.

He and Storm kept on running and were near her in a few seconds.

- "Jean ? Oh my god there is blood everywhere !! Jean !!" panicked the Weather Witch..

Logan, more in self-control, had soon found the origin of the haemorrhage.

- "For Christ'sake, she'd slashed her wrists !"

Ororo, still in shock, had raised her hand at her mouth, but resumed soon to speak to her friend.

- "Jean ? Do you hear me ? Jean ?" she tried, but it was a waste of effort, the young woman had already sunk into the deepest unconsciousness.

Disobeying Wolverine's orders, Bobby and Rogue had come closer.

- "Oh my god…"

- "She's alive" made Logan "But her pulse is weak and we've to hurry"

- "Jean ?" insisted Ororo "She completely frozen" she made before taking off her coat and covering the young woman whose clothes had turned scarlet red.

- "The most important is to stop the haemorrhage" declared Logan, taking off his jacket at his turn, tearing it to shreds thank to his claws "Bobby!" he made by sending a bit of it at the young mutant.

Iceman came out of his torpor and, understanding where Logan was driving at, used it to apply pressure over the wound of the right wrist as Wolverine was doing the same on the left-side. Immediately after, he took the young woman in his arms by wrapping her the best possible in Storm's coat and all of them hastened to return to the Institute.

Entering, they came across Shadowcat having probably gotten up to eat something. At the sight of Jean, whose bloodstained body seemed to be lifeless, pale, her arms and head falling down behind, the adolescent came to a standstill and, opening her eyes wide, stammered :

- "Doctor Grey…?"

- "Don't stay still here Kitty ! Go warn doctor McCoy, hurry up !" made Rogue.

- "Immediately !"

The mutant disappeared through a wall as the little group was hastening to the med-bay, spreading drops of blood on their way, before ending by laying Jean on one of the examination tables.

- "Rogue, do you remember the first-aid sessions Jean gave to you and the others students ?" asked Ororo "Well, it's the time to put it into practise, we've to encourage her to breathe."

Rogue, understanding where she was driving at, caught the necessary and placed the oxygen mask on the young woman's face, happy to be able to help despite the danger of her mutation in such a situation.

Storm, on her side, kept on giving her instructions:

- "Logan, help me to take her soaked clothes off; Bobby, catch an electric blanket, we've to raise her corporal temperature."

Iceman nodded and hastened to go and fetch what was asked to him.

- "What happened ?" asked Hank in an alarmed voice as he was entering quickly in the infirmary, slipping on his gown with one hand.

- "She'd slashed her wrists, we've just found her at Scott's memorial" answered Logan by covering the bloodstained young woman with the blanket, which Bobby tuned at the temperature required.

- "Oh man…" released Beast by coming closer for beginning to sound the telepath "Jean ? Do you hear me ?… how long has she been like this?" he asked by checking her pupils with a little lamp.

- "We don't know"

- "Do you know if she has taken any drugs ?" asked Hank by raising Jean's legs to allow the blood to flow more easily toward the vital-organs, congratulating the group for their first-aids.

- "We haven't got a clue, well, we've seen nothing, and I haven't smelt anything of this kind" answered a Logan whom only the adrenalin was helping him not to sink into the whole panic, him who loved Jean as his own daughter.

- "Ok"

Hank placed hastily some captors on the young woman's chest –the fingers tips weren't reliable given the circumstances– to put her under monitoring and took her blood pressure as a weak heart beat sound was filling up the room.

- "Her blood pressure is too low, she has lost a lot of blood" declared Hank "Logan, go in the cold-store and bring me two units of her blood"

Wolverine didn't argue, it was the first time he could really see the usefulness of the giving of blood that each resident was invited to do regularly in the year. In the corridor, he passed some students having got hang of the events and who opened wide their eyes seeing his clothes recovered by blood here and there. Logan didn't waste his time and sent them back into their rooms on his way. Having said that, arriving in the space where the blood was conserved, he had a shock and hastened to return to the med-lab:

- "Hank !, she's drained them ! She's destroyed her blood pack! "

- "It wasn't an impulsive act, she had planned everything" realised Ororo" …She doesn't want us to save her…"

- "It's out of question to let her die !" retorted Beast before adding: "If I'm right, I think she hasn't touched Scott's ones and I know he was of the same rare blood group as her, so…" Hank was interrupted by an alarm coming from the heart monitor and opened terrified eyes "Oh no! Her blood pressure is flapping, she'll have a cardiac-arrest !"

Beast dashed toward a drawer for catching a product which might avert the situation, but hadn't had the time to because the strident and regular sound made suddenly itself heard as a flat line was taking form on the monitoring.

- "No !!"

Understanding the situation, Logan took off the electric-blanket and was yet striving to execute a cardiac-massage while Hank was preparing the pallets. Bobby and Rogue had moved back to give the adults room. Time seemed to have suspended in the room…

Evil cliff-hanger again, isn't it ? Will jean die or not ? you'll see….Muahahhahahahahaha

You liked it ? so let me know it by reviewing please :-), the more I get the faster I post…


	26. part 26

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Slicky, Lexan and Tori H **!!**

Remember, the more reviews I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

****

Understanding the situation, Logan took off the electric-blanket and was yet striving to execute a cardiac-massage while Hank was preparing the pallets. Bobby and Rogue had moved back to give the adults room. Time seemed to have suspended in the room.

- "Come on Red, don't do it to us, come back !!" implored Wolverine.

- "Beware, move back !" made Hank before executing a first shock.

The pulse rate staggered under the blow, but resumed its imperturbable straight line.

- "Come on Jean !!" cried out Beast by recharging the pallets before executing another shock.

This time, the pulse rate wasn't content to just react to the electric shock, but resumed the pattern of beeps on the screen. Everybody sighed in relief, but Beast didn't seem to share it and kept a sceptical eye on the electrocardiogram.

- "What ?" asked Storm in a quavering voice as Logan was putting the electric-blanket back on Jean.

- "It's too weak, she won't hold on " he made before turning and going search in some drawers "She needs drastic-therapy" he said, coming back with a syringe equipped with an impressive long needle.

- "But what's…?"

Hank didn't let himself be distracted. He came closer to Jean –lowered the blanket– and stuck the needle with strength in her chest and inject the product. The young-woman reacted as if it had received a new electrical-shock and, if she hadn't sank so deeply into unconsciousness, there wasn't any doubt that this would have woken her up. Rapidly, her heart-rhythm quickened and became stable. Rogue turned away as Hank extracted the needle at one go.

- "What…what was this?" Bobby achieved to articulate.

- "Intramyocardial injection of epinephrine; that is to say epinephrine injected directly into the heart ; it's violent but necessary" explained Hank by checking again Jean's pupils "Well. Logan ?, the blood"

- "Oh yes, comin' immediately"

Even the unwavering Wolverine was shaken by the events; having said that he recovered and forced himself to stay concentrated on what he had to do before really thinking that they had just almost lost Jean. Like Hank had thought, she hadn't touched Scott's blood pack and, as soon as Logan had brought back the two asked, Beast prepared them and began the transfusion.

Henceforth less in the urgency, Hank turned himself toward Bobby and Rogue:

- "Kids, I thank you for the help you've provided and for the composure you've showed ; having said that, I'd prefer you to go out now because I'll deal with her wounds and wouldn't want to have to undertake two other people…"

Understanding where he was driving at, the two young mutants agreed to leave the infirmary after having assured Storm that they wouldn't say anything to the others students. Before following Bobby, Rogue pulled out of her pocket the bloodstained picture she had gathered near Jean, at the memorial, and put it near the reach of the young woman.

Once they were out, Hank passed onto the second act of the operations:

- "Well, so here we go" made Beast after having put a tourniquet to limit the bleeding.

He began to undo the right makeshift compressive bandage, which Bobby had placed, and had the good surprise to see that there wasn't too much harm done. After having perfectly cleaned the wound and assured himself of the absence of lesions, he sutured the notch and put on a clean bandage. For the left wrist, that was quite another matter:

- "Oh my stars and garters, she knew what she was doing, she's not a doctor for nothing…" he muttered.

- "What's up ?" asked Logan.

- "She had slashed her wrists so that the blood-flow had been quickened; in any case, we only have to look at her state, if she hadn't arrived here five minutes ago, she would have been dead" he made by referring at the cardiac-arrest.

He proceeded to clean the wounds on the other side before sounding them more attentively. As he was about to suture them, Rogue passed her head in the med-bay doorway:

- "Professor Xavier is on the phone" she said.

- "What ?" made Logan and Ororo.

- "He said he'd felt that something had just happened" précised the mutant "I tell him for the Doctor Grey ?"

- "No, I'll do it" made Storm before casting a glance at Beast "Hank ?"

- "You can go, in any case there's nothing else to do except to wait"

- "But…but she's going to be all right, isn't she ?" she asked with difficulty.

- "We've to wait" repeated Hank "She has lost a lot of blood, her body was already weakened by her recent miscarriage, her tiredness caused by her sleepless nights and her starvation. And above all that, we have she has an hypothermia, not too serious fortunately, even if the cold has, in a way limited, the lose of blood"

Storm was shaken by the news, but left the infirmary to go to the phone. She sighed and took the receiver.

- "Professor?"

- _"Ororo, what happened ?"_ asked Charles in an anxious voice.

- "It's Jean, she…she tried to kill herself" answered Ororo in a sob, the only fact to break the new to the Professor had made her realise its signification suppressed until now.

- _"Oh my god…"_

Storm recovered herself and gave him some more ample informations:

- "We've found her unconscious at Scott's memorial some fifteen minutes before…she had slashed her wrists…"

- "_Oh no…not Jean…How is she ?"_

- "Hank did his utmost, we've to wait now…" made Ororo before splitting again "But Professor, she…she's suffered a cardiac-arrest some minutes ago…Hank has had trouble to reanimate her…she was so pale, there was so much blood…" ended Storm, her voice betraying again the tears flowing out on her cheeks.

- _"I will come back immediately, I will be here in less than one hour"_ declared Charles by counting on the incredible performance of the X-Jet.

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	27. part 27

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Slicky, Lexan, and Kim Direct **!!**

**Lexan** : how cans he feel Jean and not Scott ? that's the magic of the X-Men lol

**Slicky :** oh man, my next fic is worst lol

**Kim direct** : thanks :-)

Remember, the more reviews I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

grrrr Jean's words were in a very little font, and here I can't put it like I wanted :-(

* * *

****

The night was short for the establishment adults' who looked after Jean each at their turn. The Professor was at her side as soon as he arrived at the Institute; to seeing her so pale, and knowing what had conducted her at the med-bay was breaking his heart.

- "We should've suspected it, we should've expected it" made Wolverine by shaking his head.

- "We were wrong Logan, she made us see what we wanted to believe, she let us suppose by her behaviour that she had decided to fight, to grapple with the life, but she didn't really mean to live anymore" answered the Professor, a hand on the young woman's one "Rejecting us was a way to get away because it made us hate her, and like that to break off more easily from us…I have thought a lot about it during the flight" he added in front of the perplexed looks of Logan and Ororo.

Hank, made his appearance, exchanged some words with the Professor Xavier and checked Jean's vitals-functions who he had placed on a drip once the transfusion ended, letting to her the oxygen spectacles (this rubber tubing which passes in front of the nose and behind the ears) for helping her to breath.

- "So ?" they asked, waiting for the doctor's verdict.

- "She's stable, but she's weak"

The Professor sighed and spoke to Jean in a soft and paternal voice:

- "Jean, I know you have nothing to be fastened to anymore and that it's selfish from us to ask you that, but I beg you, hang on… I…I don't want to lose another one of my children…"

* * *

Around 8.45 a.m, Hank was assuring the young woman surveillance and had sent his friends to take a rest some hours ago. At some stage, some slight movements attracted his attention and he came closer of his patient to whom he spoke in a soft voice:

- "Jean ? yes that's right, come back, open your eyes Jean"

The mutant needed several minutes to do what he was asking her and kept her eyes relatively shut so that she was feeling emptied. Judging by the heart monitor sound's, she was in the med-bay, but what was she doing here ? Why wasn't she with Scott ?

She saw Beast giving her a welcoming smile before he declared:

- "You gave us such a fright Jean ; You've been lucky, you've nearly died but we've been able to reanimate you on time and…"

- "…_why_… ? " she faintly articulated in a barely audible sound.

Hank realised what he had just said:

- "Oh…that's true…Listen Jean, I know you wanted to die –and you'd have succeeded it if they hadn't found you – but what did you want them to do ? that they sat down and patiently watch you emptying of your blood and sigh your last breath ??" he asked without hardness in his voice.

- "…_I…I haven't…asked them…to search me_ …"

- "But they did it Jean, they did it because they were worried for you"

Jean closed her eyes some instants, she was feeling like wavering, as if her vigilance was perpetually flickering.

- "…_my chest is…hurting me …why_ ?"

- "That's the electric-shocks and the intramyocardial injection of epinephrine" answered Hank, making her understand on the same occasion how close of the death she had been "You'll stay weakened during one or two days, you've lost a lot of blood and – to answer the question you may be asking you– yes we've been confronted by the problem caused by the fact you had drained your blood-packs, but you should've known I'd immediately thought at the person who had the same blood group than you…"

- "…_Scott_…"

- "Yes, Scott; henceforth his blood runs in your veins…"

Jean didn't answer at this remark, she knew she should've done the same with Scott's blood packs, but she hadn't been able to resolve herself to do it, she hadn't been able to.

She was feeling herself sinking again into the unconsciousness but achieved to articulate some words in addition:

- "…_I'll…rejoin him_…"

Hank observed sadly his friend and check if she was staying stable despite her faint, before taking her at her last words. He moved the young woman in one of the infirmary-rooms where he proceeded to some modify some things.

* * *

One hour later, Logan, Charles and Ororo were waiting at the room exit where Hank had transferred Jean. Seeing them, Beast went to meet them and at the mutant's look, the three others knew that the news weren't bad, at least for the medical side.

- "She briefly woke up one hour before, but has sunk back into unconsciousness after having shared some barely audible words" he informed them.

- "How is she ?" asked Storm.

- "Unhappy to be alive…"

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	28. part 28

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Slicky, Lexan, and Kim Direct **!!**

**Lexan** : I've hesitated to put it, so I'm glad you liked it

**Slicky** : how much longer will she suffer ? you'll see...

**Kim direct :** where's Scott ? you'll see :- )

Remember, the more reviews I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

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****

- "Unhappy to be alive…"

- "Yes, I guess that when ya've attempted to kill yerself and that, at yer wakin', a doctor with a wide smile tell ya somethin' like : 'Ya've been lucky' ya'd felt a feeling of rancour …" supposed Logan.

Hank had like a discomforted silence before admitting:

- "That's what I've said to her, but…You know, as a doctor I've always learned how to save people, but we have to understand that sometimes some ones want to die" answered Hank before adding in a serious look "She'll do it again"

- "Huh ?"

- "She made me understand it, actually, she didn't even give me a hint of it, her vigilance was too weak for that" précised Hank "She'll attempt again to kill herself and will end to achieve it, we won't be always behind her…"

The professor went out of his concentration in which he had sunk to scan Jean's mind, henceforth wide opened.

- "Yes, she will do it again," he confirmed in a deep voice "she intends firmly to do it and risks to try sooner that we think…"

Hank nodded:

- "That's what I've thought, that's why, when she's lost consciousness again, I've taken advantage of it to move her in a room less risky and change of place all objects or medicine she could use" declared Hank "This will let us one or two days to see at longer-range, the time to her to recover. Here she didn't even have the strength to stay conscious more than one minute and was very weak, so hence to move or use her powers…"

A silence seized again the four mutants before Logan pulled out a paper of his pocket.

- "Yesterday evening, I came back in her room, I've told me that she ought to have let us somethin' and I've found this message" he declared while extending it to them "It had glided under the bed, probably cos of a gust of wind"

Ororo caught it and read it at loud voice :

------

_I'm sorry, but it's too hard and I can't bear it anymore._

_I hope you'll understand and forgive me for that and for all I could've said or done the previous days._

_Jean_

------

* * *

Two floors above, Bryan woke up of a sleep haunted by the strange vision of the evening before. He saw that most of the students with who he shared his bedroom were already up, only Arty was slightly snoring at the other end of the room. Bryan stretched and got up quickly –Just to not let his mind wandering a too long time– slipped on a dressing gown and went silently out of the bedroom.

The corridors were silent, but, the more he approached the kitchen and the living room, the more there were students, most of them chatting in little groups which wasn't common apparently, something had happened. Intrigued, Bryan pricked up his ears as he was passing in front of three students older than him.

- "Yes, it seemed to be, like, rather serious…" made Kitty at Amara and Rahne who were listening with a concerned look.

- "What seemed to be serious ?" asked the young mutant who couldn't help to think again about the flash of the evening before.

- "Doctor Grey, she has been injured" answered Shadowcat "I've seen, like, professor Logan, Ororo, Rogue and Bobby taking her to the med-bay yesterday evening, they were, like, coming from outside and I can tell you it really looked serious, she was unconscious and covered with blood"

Amara and Rahne had put their hand on their mouth. Bryan, he, froze…Doctor Grey injured ? From outside ? The professor Logan, the professor Ororo plus Bobby and Rogue ? like in his vision…

- "What happened ?" he asked, still sceptic that this could accredit his power manifestation.

- "I dunno, they didn't want to tell us more, except, like, that she's pulled through" answered Kitty before reacting by seeing the young move off "Hey ! Where are you going ?"

He didn't answer and started to search the Professor Xavier who he found on his way as he was coming from the med-lab.

- "Professor ! I've to talk to you!" he told him in a voice betraying his confusion.

Feeling this should be important for his young student, Charles conceded to listen to him, although Jean was preoccupying his mind.

- "What is the matter Bryan ?"

- "I had a vision Professor ! Something strange; I thought it was unfounded like for the others, but it doesn't seem to be the case!" formulated the young mutant.

- "All right, settle down and try to explain to me more clearly what was it all about" asked Charles.

- "It was about Doctor Grey, she was hurt, willingly if you see what I mean…"

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	29. part 29

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Slicky, Lexan, and Lil Jean **!!**

**Lexan** : oh yeah, I like letting you in a cliff hanger MUAHAHAHAHAHAH, I'm evil

Remember, the more reviews I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

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****

- "It was about Doctor Grey, she was hurt, willingly if you see what I mean…"

The professor gave him all his attention –nobody was aware of the circumstances of Jean' state except the ones who had the instruction not to disclose it– so he listened to Bryan carefully and didn't regret it :

- "It was taking place outside, in front of the memorial of the professor who died before my coming, and I saw him too, but he was alive and there were others people that I didn't know and…" Bryan interrupted himself and sighed "…I know, my powers are completely silly, they're useless, my visions are always stupid…"

The Professor Xavier joined up like he could the puzzle which his young student was relating to him and reacted immediately when this one became discouraged:

- "No Bryan, I'm not so sure this time, but for this, I will need to have access to this vision" he said in a deep voice by asking him to approach and to kneel in order he could put his hands in periphery of his head "You won't feel anything, I just need you to relax and to think again at what you have seen without erasing or adding anything"

Bryan nodded and closed his eyes, giving the Professor the time to see all he had seen: the memorial, the blood, the wrists cuts, and then…Scott, Scott in a kind of dark cell and two others who he knew too well.

Storm and Hank made their appearance (Logan staying with Jean to keep an eye on her) as the Professor was going out of Bryan's mind, obviously extremely confused.

- "What is it ?" asked Ororo, effectively it wasn't usual to see Charles using his telepathy on one of his students in the corridor.

The young mutant had looked up to the Professor and was surprised not to see him smile so that his vision was stupid.

- "You have done well to come to tell me about that Bryan, you can leave now" declared Charles before turning toward Beast once the student had enough moved away "Hank, you who have well seen the notches on Jean's writs and forearms can you draw me a quick sketch of them ?" he asked.

Beast was surprised by the request, but nodded and pulled out a notebook from his gown on which he scrawled skilfully before giving the notebook to Charles. At the sight of the sketch the Professor turned pale which worried the two mutants.

- "Professor ?"

- "That isn't possible…" he made, like if he hadn't heard them.

- "Professor ?" repeated Ororo, this time she won Charles' attention "What's not possible ? Why Bryan is come to see you ?"

- "Because yesterday evening he has had a vision, he's seen Jean attempting to kill herself, but not only, he's also seen Scott who seemed to have received the vision too"

Storm slowly shook her head.

- "Professor, so hard it may be to say it, even today, Scott is dead" she made calmly "Bryan must have simply made a mistake, his vision must have been influenced by his imagination"

- "I don't think so Storm," Charles contradicted her "I've read his mind, his vision seemed to be reliable with what might have happened, what **_even_ _you_** haven't seen, which has happened **_before_** you found Jean. I have seen in it the notches and there're tallying **_perfectly_** with the sketch Hank has just drawn for me"

Beast interrupted him:

- "Professor, we aren't denying that Bryan might effectively have, in some way, witnessed Jean's attempt of suicide, given that's it's obvious that he couldn't know that she had tried to kill herself, nor how and where she had done it" he made "But as regards Scott…"

- "Bryan hasn't known him, he has only seen him on pictures and couldn't have imagined him so precisely if it wasn't real" cut the Professor Xavier at his turn " I have also troubles to believe it, but you have to admit that this is confusing…"

A silence answered to him.

- "Supposing that you're right, " conceded Ororo "If Scott was alive, why nobody would've known it ? I mean, the bond he was sharing with Jean has been broken, Cerebro hasn't detected him and…"

- "Because Magneto didn't want us to find him"

- "Magneto ? What is he doing in it ?" asked Hank more and more sceptic.

- "I have to go to Cerebro immediately, I have to verify it" answered the Professor, pivoting his wheeling-chair and moving away quickly, leaving Hank and Ororo perplexed.

The two mutants stayed still during a while before Beast asked Storm :

- "Honestly, what do you think about it ? "

- "Honestly ? I dunno" she made, seeming pensive "But the Professor seemed really confused and he's not the kind of letting himself be influenced by false hopes, so maybe he's right…"

She exchanged a glance with Hank and with one accord, they left on Charles' tracks and waited behind Cerebro's closed door.

* * *

Some twenty minutes later, the big round room opened up again, letting appear a Professor Xavier seeming shaken.

- "So ?" asked the two mutants without great hope.

You liked it ? so let me know it by reviewing please :-), the more I get the faster I post…


	30. part 30

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Slicky, Lexan, Lil Jean, Tori H and Aimtbj !!

All of you hate the cliff-hanger, but that's what brings the suspence…and so much reviews that I'll post the continuation sooner

Remember, the more reviews I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

****

- "So ?" asked the two mutants without great hope.

Charles raised shinning eyes toward them but didn't answer; instead, he placed a hand on his temple and sent a telepathic message:

> _Rogue, I would want you or Bobby to come down to keep an eye on Jean and that you send Logan immediately to my office_

He waited to receive an answer from the young student and turned back his attention on Hank and Ororo.

- "Logan will rejoin us in my office, Rogue will take his place near Jean" he made by starting his wheel-chair toward his office "Ororo could you please go to meet him in order to speak to him about Bryan on the way ?"

- "But…" made the Weather Witch, frustrated not knowing if yes or no Cerebro had revealed something.

- "I will tell you everything once we will be all in my office"

- "All Right" Storm gave in and moved quickly away.

Hank didn't learn more and, once arrived at Professor Xavier's office, waited Logan and Storm's coming, which wasn't long. Like expected, Logan was wearing the same sceptical look than the two others X-Men when those ones had been aware of the events.

- "What's this story Charles ?" he grumbled.

- "Will you, after all, tell us what Cerebro has found ?" asked Ororo by sitting next to Beast.

The professor gave them a gleaming glance and declared in a categorical voice:

- "Scott didn't die in this plane crash"

- "What ?"

Charles smiled and began his explanations :

- "You know I can't access Magneto's mind with Cerebro because of his helmet ; but it's different for his acolytes" he started "I have achieved to locate Pyro and to enter his mind and here is what I have discovered : The alleged Scott's death was a production, the plane crash has been orchestrated by Magneto who, thanks to his powers, has slackened its fall for being able to extract Cyclops –unconscious but alive–, then he has let Pyro the care to finish off the 49 others passengers, which explain the strangeness of the fire"

Logan, Ororo and Hank were gaping.

- "I have also discovered that Scott was detained in a complex in the subsoil of the New-Mexico desert's, which one is surrounded with the same material which prevents me from detecting Magneto ; that's why the bond between Jean and Scott has been broken, because of Scott's lose of consciousness and of his place of sequestration."

- "But Cyke' could've escaped, I mean, he's an incredible destructive power…" began Logan.

- "They have kept him under shelter from the sun –from which he got his powers as you know– and have drugged him until they went off ; which explain why, in Bryan's vision, Scott wasn't wearing his goggles : but little people have seen the colour of his eyes" carried on the Professor Xavier with enthusiasm "I have also seen that Mastermind, a mutant having the capacity of modifying people's memory, had been employed in this operation to persuade Scott of Jean's death"

This was doing a lot of information at one go and the present X-Men needed a while for gathering their minds.

- "Oh my god…" ended by releasing Ororo.

- "But why havin' taken so much pain for kidnappin' him ?" asked Logan.

- "Out of revenge of the put in failure of his project on _Liberty-Island_" answered Charles.

- "But…" wanted to ask Hank.

- "I will explain all to you later. All that's matter is that Scott is alive and detained captive since all these weeks" interrupted Charles "X-Men, I want you to go to the New-Mexico desert's, and that you bring Cyclops to us"

- "I'll prepare the X-Jet" declared Logan with determination before leaving the room.

- "Hank, you go with them, you won't be too much of three even if Magneto doesn't expect an attack" said the Professor Xavier before answering to the question Beast was asking himself "I will take care of Jean"

- "You won't tell her anything if she regains consciousness during our absence ? " asked Ororo.

- "No, I rather no in case the things would not go as planned and you couldn't bring him here safe and sound"

- "Yes, you're right" approved Beast before turning himself toward Storm "I'll be ready in less than five minutes"

- "I've already transmitted the coordinates to the X-Jet" said Charles "Be careful"

The two X-Men nodded and left hastily the office at their turn.

* * *

Scott hadn't had other choice than to stop struggling uselessly against his cell door, he hadn't the strength anymore. He had ended by letting himself slip against it and by closing his eyes, trying to feel again Jean's presence in his mind, but unsuccessfully. He might have subsequently fallen asleep for long hours because, when he opened his eyes again, he realised that he felt pain everywhere caused by the cold ground on which he was sat. He decided himself to rise to go to lie down on his straw mattress, which was more comfortable.

He had slept another hour. Some minutes before, when Mystique had brought to him his tray, he had achieved to make her speak –well, evocating Mastermind's existence won't have any consequences, because this one will come back to put things right–, she had left with a malicious smile on her lips, obviously delighted of their prisoner's confusion. But Scott hadn't paid attention to that, henceforth he knew from what had come this false memory and why it had seemed so much real. Knowing there was maybe a hope that Jean be alive despite what he had seen and felt the day before, he fastened to it and ate for the first time on his own free will since weeks to regain some strength. He was finishing his meal when he perceived an unusual agitation; and what he heard some minutes later, he thought he would never heard it again.

- "Scott ?? Scott!!?"

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	31. part 31

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Slicky, Lexan, Lil Jean, Tori H, Aimtbj,Mrs. Jean Grey-Summers, softbalchick181 and the unknown reviewer **!!**

**Mrs. Jean Grey-Summers :** oh a lot of thing cans happen again, the jet could crash, or Jean could…MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA ! lol

**Lexan**: same thing than for Mrs Jean Grey-Summers, you never know with me MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA !

All of you hate the cliff-hanger, but that's what brings the suspence…and so much reviews that I'll post the continuation sooner

Remember, the more reviews I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

****

- "Scott ?? Scott!?!"

Someone was calling him, someone was looking for him and he knew that voice, it was Ororo's…

- "Storm ?" he answered in a voice given harsher by the conditions of life in which he had been kept.

- "He's here!" declared another voice.

- "Logan ?" said Cyclops, getting up, incredulous.

In some instants, Wolverine had crumpled up the door. He briefly hugged Scott :

- "Happy to see me again kid ?" he asked, giving to him a rare smile proving that himself couldn't be more delighted.

- "But how ?"

Storm made her appearance:

- "Oh, it's not possible, you were really alive Scott !" she made with emotion by hugging too a confused young man before declaring in a more serious voice: "Better not to drag on"

- "Yeah, all this is really touchin', but I smell somethin' bad in the air and I'd not want us to be retarded by a dirty cat" replied Logan by referring to Sabretooth "Ya can walk ?" he asked Scott.

- "Yes, yes I think" answered Cyclops, just coming out of his surprise.

They began to take him out of his cell but Scott stopped them.

- "Wait, I want to know, I had a strange vision last evening and…"

- "Jean is alive Scott" answered Storm with a smile, understanding immediately what he wanted to talk about thanks to Charles's explanations ", and you're gonna see her again if we come out of here alive"

Scott smiled for the first time since months :

- "Then I can even run if necessary" he said.

- "Perfect bub" made Logan by passing his arm around Scott's waist for sustaining him, seeing that he wasn't in the better of his form for all that

Some instants later, they had rejoined Beast who had just ended with Toad and the four of them cleared a way to the outside.

Unfortunately, even if all had seemed relatively easy until now, they had the bad surprise to see that they were expected…

- "Where did you intend to go ?" laughed at Pyro, accompanied by Mystique and Sabretooth.

- "Here are precisely those who I'd have preferred to avoid…" muttered Storm, her eyes covering suddenly with a white-mist.

They were about to take the offensive when, all of a sudden, Cyclops started to moan in pain, catching his head to try to calm the searing migraine which was assailing him.

- "Scott ?" worried Ororo, wanting to help him, but Hank prevent her, he knew the cause of this pain, the sun was strongly beating above their head…

Knowing himself perfectly by what this migraine was caused, Scott turned his head towards the place where the three acolytes were standing and opened his eyes, setting free a red-beam of a strength still insufficient for destroying all on its way, but able to project the three mutants several meters behind, where they fell down knocked out.

- "Here is what I call expeditious methods" said Logan obviously satisfied "That's not that the idea of givin' a kick up Sabretooth's ass displease me, but I know someone who's particularly in a hurry to return home" he added by referring obviously to Scott who had closed again his eyes which ones he was henceforth keeping tightly shut.

- "Yes, let's go, better not wait for them to wake up" approved Strom, guiding Cyclops to the X-Jet, landed some meters farther.

They quickly embarked the X-Jet, Logan taking the control column. Hank gave to Scott a pair of his ruby-red sunglasses which he had recuperated in Jean's room and taken the precaution to bring, and took care of his contusions, giving also to him something to eat as it was obvious that he had lost weight. Scott didn't refuse it, as Storm was establishing a connexion with the Institute for announcing to the Professor Xavier the success of the operation.

- "How did you find me ?" asked Scott "How did you know…"

- "That you were alive ?" questioned Beast "For that, you'll have to thank a certain Bryan –Actually we'll all thank him– a student arrived some months before and who has also had a vision yesterday evening, which one had strongly made doubt the Professor ; it's his perseverance which had revealed the truth"

- "Which day are we ? I haven't got a clue of the time which has melted away"

- "We are at the 12 of November" answered Ororo.

- "So it makes almost four months…" deducted Scott before slightly wince, which didn't escape to Hank.

- "How is the migraine ?" he asked him.

- "It'll be all right, all I want is come back home and see Jean again, I…I believed she was dead during all this time"

- "We know it" made Logan from his piloting post "By reading Pyro's mind, Charles has learned for the intervention of a mutant called Mastermind"

- "It must've been terrible " Storm was upset "Jean was surrounded, but you've had to confront this alone"

- "The harder has been that they were preventing me from rejoining her" Scott admitted without beating about the bush "I missed her so much, I can't achieve to believe that I'll see her again and be able to take her in my arms again, how is she? "

- "Not well" admitted Hank before précising hastily in front of Scott's look "I'm not speaking from the medical point of view –even if on this side she's really been on death's door– but about her moral in general, you have to know that a lot of things have happened…"

Ororo exchanged a glance with Beast and declared:

- "Scott, we know you weren't aware of it –and we've ourselves learned it only one month after your alleged death– but Jean was pregnant of you, she had just had the confirmation and wanted to announce it to you at your return from Hawaii…"

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	32. part 32

I'm coming back from the annual fireworks and post the continuation for you !

_Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through._

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Slicky, Lexan, Danae, Kim Direct, Lil Jean, Tori H, Aimtbj,Mrs. Jean Grey-Summers, softbalchick181, StrangeAffinity and the unknown reviewer !!

**Mrs. Jean Grey-Summers :** the upliftin what ??

**ToriH**** and softbalchick181 :** and you haven't yet read the horrible fic I'll post on the cartoon verse…

**Lexan**: lol

**StrangeAffinity****: **thanks for this long and great review : -)

I wasn't the one who should have written the reunion part, so excuse me for the sappy thing, overall in the next part.

All of you hate the cliff-hanger, but that's what brings the suspence…and so much reviews that I'll post the continuation sooner

Remember, the more reviews I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

****

- "Scott, we know you weren't aware of it –and we've ourselves learned it only one month after your alleged death– but Jean was pregnant of you, she had just had the confirmation and wanted to announce it to you at your return from Hawaii…"

Scott's face passed by a multitude of emotions before realising that the mutant had used the past :

- " '_Was_'… ?"

- "Yes, she…she's had a miscarriage last week, at more than five and a half months of pregnancy, she was expecting a boy" précised Ororo ", and it's here that all have degenerated"

This was Logan who carried on :

- "She's completely withdrawn into herself, she's started to reject all and nothin', to break some things to pieces, to run away and finally she's attempted to kill herself in the hope to rejoin ya"

- "We've really been afraid when we've found her yesterday evening, she's really nearly died" declared Storm, sweeping away a tear as the event's evocation was still as much shacking her "But thanks to Hank's medical care, she's pulled through and everything will be alright now that she'll find you again" she smiled.

- "She had fallen again unconscious when we've left and still is, so she's not aware and in all case wouldn't have been; Charles thought that it was preferable in the case all wouldn't happened as much right" notified Logan.

Scott stayed pensive during a moment, all had happened so quickly, the vision, the truth about his memory, his liberation and now these news. After a while of silence, he declared :

- "When I think I also had something to announce to her on my return from Hawaii, actually I intended to ask her to marry me"

Ororo and Hank smiled.

- "You'll have a second chance against all hopes" made Storm.

During the remain of the flight, Scott could exchange his worn clothes for clean ones which had brought to him Hank –here too, Beast only had to search in their closet– and made a quick wash, counting the miles still separating him from Jean.

* * *

Jean regained suddenly consciousness and the first thing she noticed was this strange and comfortable feeling she had lost months before, the one to be psychically-linked with the person for who she'd give her life. This soothing presence, this feeling of security…She must be mistaken, it was impossible that this was **_their_** bond, or she was dreaming. All of a sudden, she heard a voice in her mind, **_his_** voice, he was calling her :

> _ Jean_…

At first, the young woman didn't know how to react this voice was Scott's one, she was sure of that, but that's was impossible.

_Jean_…

_Scott ?_ she answered in a hesitant voice.

Through the bond she shared in former times with her soul mate, she felt a deep emotion. In the Jet, in landing proceeding, Scott's eyes had misted over with tears at the hearing of her voice.

> _Scott ?__…it's not possible, I…you're…you're dead…_ she sent.
> 
> _No, I…it was an illusion Jean, I'd been kidnapped by Magneto…Oh I can't believe it Jean, you're alive …_
> 
> _Scott_… She couldn't say anything else so that she was feeling lost, not knowing anymore if she was dreaming or only becoming mad.

The professor Xavier, present in the room, was silently observing Jean's reaction. He knew Scott must be speaking to her through the so special link they shared, he felt the presence of a kind of telepathy even if he couldn't hear what he was saying to her. He heard the 'bipping' sound of the heart-monitor quickening and saw a tear escaping the young mutant's eyes whose perplexed-look hadn't left her face.

Suddenly, she pushed away the blanket, pulled out captors, oxygen spectacles and drip, and climbed down of her bed no without nearly falling so much she was weak. Wearing only a long nightdress, she didn't pay more attention to her shivering due to her weakness and the cold than to Charles'presence, and went out of the room as she could. The powerful telepath didn't attempt anything to stop her even if Jean was hardly standing.

Leaning on the wall in order to not fall, Jean was going to the hangar, seeming to be still in a kind of trance, not even noticing that Charles was following her. And suddenly, in the turn of a corridor, she saw him and froze under the shock...

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	33. part 33

_Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through._

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : StrangeAffinity, Mrs. Jean Grey-Summers, Slicky, Aimtbj and the unknown reviewer !!

**Mrs. Jean Grey-Summers :** ah ok, thanks so :-)

**StrangeAffinity****: **for the sap you'll be happy lol)

I wasn't the one who should have written the reunion part, so excuse me for the sappy thing.

All of you hate the cliff-hanger, but that's what brings the suspence…and so much reviews that I'll post the continuation sooner

Remember, the more reviews I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

****

Leaning on the wall in order to not fall, Jean was going to the hangar, seeming to be still in a kind of trance, not even noticing that Charles was following her. And suddenly, in the turn of a corridor, she saw him and froze under the shock.

- " Scott…" she murmured.

He was standing here, at some fifteen meters from her, like her, he had stopped too, as if he didn't want to break the dream he was living. Like the Professor Xavier, the others X-Men had stayed in the background while observing the reunion of the young couple.

Suddenly, without letting him out of her sight, her eyes filled by tears, Jean resumed to walk, to walk faster and faster, drawing her strength from nowhere; Scott made the same and it was at midway that they fell in each others arms.

- "Oh god, oh god" breathed Jean, in tears, holding a Scott as much emotive than her "It's you, it's really you…"

Both of them had let themselves fall on their knees, theirs legs refusing to carry them further more, the emotion was too strong.

- "I missed you so much Jean" made Scott before taking her face streaming with tears between his hands, their eyes meeting again.

Jean had made the same, as for being sure that he was well real and that he wasn't going to vanish. Running his fingers through her long red-hair, Scott laid his lips against hers to give her a kiss desired for so long.

> _I have the impression that I'm dreaming _said Jean through their bond, letting herself go into his embrace.
> 
> _If that's one, then I want to never again wake up…_ answered Scott _never again _

Charles, Ororo, Hank and even Logan had tears in theirs eyes or were blatantly crying, smiling in front of this unhoped-for scene from where was leaking out limitless love.

They felt almost like intruders but couldn't turn away their eyes.

They were pulled out of theirs reverie by Jean's sudden lost of consciousness, and more particularly by Scott's worry who Hank hastened to reassure:

- "It's nothing Scott, she's still very weak that's all" he said to him in a calm voice. "As a matter of fact, I don't even know how she's done to walk until here whereas she hadn't been able to stay conscious more than one minute this morning"

Seeing that Scott was about to carry her, Beast stopped him :

- "I know you'd like to do it yourself Scott, but I prefer that it was me who undertake it, it's safer, you can barely support yourself"

Scott knew he was right and nodded reluctantly, releasing Jean's hand only at the last time. He started to follow Hank and drawn soon level with Professor Xavier's who gave him a warm smile:

- "Welcome back home Scott"

The X-Men hugged as he could the man he had always considered as his father.

- "Thanks Professor, thanks for having brought me back"

- "Leave the acknowledgement for later and go to rejoin your Jean" smiled Charles.

Scott didn't wait to be asked and made his way quickly toward the convalescence-room where Hank had just laid the young woman. He went to sit down on the edge of the bed, taking her hand in his and pressing it against his lips as Beast was declaring:

- "That's just a slight malaise, I've the necessary to make her regain consciousness"

He searched some instants in a drawer and pulled out from it a little phial, which he uncorked and passed under Jean's nose. She slightly moaned and turned her head away from the bottle.

- "Smelling salts, an old trick still as much effective" he smiled before declaring "We'll leave you alone"

Jean had immediately recognized the hand surrounding hers and when she opened her eyes, it was for seeing that **_HE_** was still here. The tears resuming even more, smiling as she hadn't smiled since months, she held out her hand toward Scott's face and felt through their bond that he closed his eyes at her touch for letting the emotions invade him.

- "Scott…you haven't disappeared…" she murmured in a weak voice _hug me_.

Pushed himself by the desire to feel her against him again, Scott didn't make her wait and climbed in the bed, surrounding Jean with his arms, whose one felt theirs emotions overwhelmed them again.

- "I love you so much" she breathed, her face against his.

- "I love you more than my own life" he answered as much in tears than she.

They spent some long minutes in silence, only snuggling up to each other, listening one's heart beating, feeling the warmth and softness of one's skin, kissing each other.

> _…I believed you were dead too…Magneto had made modify my memory…I believed you were dead during all this time…oh Jean I thought I'd never see you again…_ sent Scott through their bond, unable to pronounce a word in more, unwilling to break their kiss.

They tightened a little more their embrace, as much as it was still possible

> …_You're alive, I have so much dreamed this moment_…
> 
> …_That's real Jean, that's real…oh god, I'll never leave you again, never again_ _…_

It was exhausted that both of them ended by sinking into sleep, their fingers intertwined or lost in each other's hair, so much clasped in each other arms that it was difficult to know to whom belong what.

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	34. part 34

_Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through._

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Danae, LilJean, Slicky, Mrs. Jean Grey-Summers, Aimtbj, ToriH, Lexan, Turkee and the unknown reviewer !!

**Slicky**not the end, but it's coming soon, maybe I'll do a sequel later

**Aimtbj**: it was even shorter before I noticed it and but a longer part for you

**Tori**** H :** thanks :-)

**Lexan**: thanks a lot, and unfortunately, it's almost the end…

I wasn't the one who should have written the reunion part, so excuse me for the sappy thing.

Remember, the more reviews I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

Jean slowly went out of the deep-sleep in which she had sunk into. She was well, it seemed to her that the wonderful dream she had done was prolonging, it seemed to her that Scott's hand was still stroking her hair and that she was feeling his heart beating, that she was feeling his presence in her mind and his scent. She didn't want to open her eyes for seeing that all was only an illusion, but when she felt lips kissing her forehead she couldn't help herself.

- "Hey" smiled Scott.

Jean's face was lit by a smile.

- "You're still here, it wasn't a dream" she realised.

- "I've feared it too" he made in a soft voice, caressing her face.

As for being sure once for all that everything was real, they sealed their lips in a soft and passionate kiss, keeping the bond linking them wide opened to let their emotions speak for themselves.

- "I love you" made Jean by passing a finger on his lips.

Scott's glance was attracted by a dark-flaw clashing with the clear colour of the bandage wrapping her left wrists and forearm.

- "You've bled" he made by caressing her palm with one finger.

Jean hadn't even noticed it.

- "I think I have a little too much forced"

- "It's hurting ?" asked Scott knowing very well that the bandages where covering deep-slashes ; it was more a statement than a question, he knew she was suffering, he could feel it through their bond.

- "It doesn't matter"

Scott kissed her palm before declaring:

- "You know, it's thanks to what you've done that I've realised that all I was remembering was only an illusion created by a mutant having the capacity to modify the memory ; that you weren't dead, that it was only what they've wanted me to believe." made Scott in a soft voice without stopping stroking Jean's hair "I don't know how, but, despite the thousands of miles which were separating us, despite the protections against the telepathic intrusions where Magneto was retaining me, I've felt it, I've seen it, I've seen you…and I've been so much afraid that, even if you were alive previously, you were dead just now."

- "I really died the very day I believed you were dead" breathed Jean "It was so much hard Scott, you're all my life"

- "And you're all mine" answered the young man before kissing her again.

They stayed silent a while, only savouring the fact of being in each other arms, before Jean resumed talking in a different voice :

- "Scott, I…I have to tell you something"

The young man put a finger on her lips to prevent her from going further more.

- "I know, I'm yet aware, Hank, Ororo and Logan have told me about" he explained "They thought that, the wound being still very recent, you would rather like not having to announce it to me by yourself"

Jean nodded, feeling the tears rose in her eyes.

- "I…I'm sorry…"

Scott frowned and asked her in a soft voice :

- "Hey, why do you say it ? because you've had a miscarriage ?"

The young woman nodded again, tears escaping from her eyes which wringed Scott's heart.

- "Oh Jean, after all you've been through, this could've arrived really sooner, it's not your fault, you've nothing to do with that and you know it" he said by chasing away the tears with a finger or a kiss "I don't want you to blame yourself because you feel an emptiness despite the fact that we're again together, you're suffering and its absolutely normal, I truly understand it –I'm suffering for not having been here– I love you, you know it ? And I'm here now if you want to talk about it"

- "I love you" she breathed.

He had found the rights words and hadn't immediately evoked the fact that she would be able to fall pregnant again and she was grateful for that. She curled up a little more against him and kissed him with tenderness.

- "Oh sorry" apologized Hank by entering in the room, a tray with bandages and disinfectants in the hands "Good-Morning you two, well slept I guess ?"

Two smiles answered to him better than words.

- "I was coming to change your bandages Jean and, according to what I see, it won't be unwelcome" he said by noticing the blood on the bandages "And I'd also like to sound you Scott and make a blood-test" he added before going on in another subject "Tell me, Professor Xavier has already announced the news at the students and they are speaking only of that, they call that the _'Christmas miracle before the hour'_. In brief, we thought that we could take the breakfast all together –by some solid thirty minutes– ; both of you need to regain some strength by eating something of substantial."

- "We'll go anywhere you want as far as we stay together" answered Scott, having consulted the telepath through their bond.

- "That's what we have thought" smiled Hank "So, with who I begin ?"

- " Take care of Jean first, I'll go to take a shower and slip on more comfortable clothes" he said before sending to the young woman through their bond '_I won't be long and I'll bring you warm clothes'_

He reluctantly broke their embrace and got out of the bed, before kissing her :

- "I love you" he breathed.

- "Love you too" answered Jean, keeping his hand in hers as long as possible before he went out.

You liked it ? so let me know it by reviewing please :-), the more I get the faster I post…


	35. part 35

Please, remember that I'm French so I had to translate the whole fic before making correct it (thanks to ET and Double27) and mistakes always goes through.

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Diaz, Mrs. Jean Grey-Summers, Aimtbj, Lexan and the unknown reviewer !!

**Lexan**: sorry, but it was long, the correction of the translation wasn't advancing and I had to finish my novel at this time…

I wasn't the one who should have written the reunion part, so excuse me for the sappy thing.

Remember, the more reviews I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

Hank smiled and took a chair, which he drew near the bed for taking care of his patient more easily.

- "It risks to hurt you when I'll remove the bandages because the blood which has dried may have adhered the stitches at the gauze" he warned her as he was about to undo the right one.

- "That doesn't matter" answered Jean, having kept the bond with Scott wide-opened, whose one was breathing sweet words to her until she heard…

> _And oh shit ! I've missed the right corridor ! _

Jean couldn't hold a burst of laugher at Hank's greatest surprise because he was justly afraid to have hurt her by removing completely the bandage.

- "That's not the kind of reaction I was expecting, but that perfectly suits me" joked Beast.

- "No, it's not that, it's Scott" smiled Jean "He…he has lost his way"

> _That's your fault, you're occupying all my thoughts _she received, which made her smile again.

Hank carried on the medical care, suspecting well that the two young people might use their bond for not breaking the contact.

- "It's a pleasure to see you smile and laugh again Jean" he said by ending to change the second bandage.

When he looked up at her, he saw that she had become serious again and he understood the reasons when she declared :

- "Hank, I…I wanted to thank you for having saved my life…"

Beast didn't make the obvious remark that, if they had brought back Scott without having saved her, he would without any doubts have rejoined her in the days which would have followed, but was contented by the clichéd answer accompanied by a smile :

- "You don't have to thank me Jean, after all, I've only done my job"

* * *

When Scott came back, Hank left to prepare the infirmary (for the exams he intended to make pass to the young man) as this last one was helping Jean to slip on the clothes he had brought for her –lingering a little in the task– before going to rejoin him with the telepath.

So, one hour after their waking, the young couple made his way to the great dining-room where they were welcomed by a solid twenty students. The Professor having expressly asked to them not to ask question to Scott about his sequestration or to Jean about her stay at the med-bay, the students didn't disobey and respected the private-life of their mentors. Only the older students suspected what might have happened to Jean and this even if Rogue and Bobby hadn't said anything and that nothing could be seen – the long sleeves hiding the bandages– except for a certain tiredness ; which one was also shared by Scott.

The couple warmly thanked Bryan, without who they couldn't have found themselves again, and forbid him at perpetuity to under-estimate his powers and their utility, which Professor Xavier approved, delighted to see that the young mutant seemed proud of himself for the first time since his coming.

As they were all about to reach for a croissant, a cup of coffee or hot chocolate, Jean didn't sit down immediately but asked for the attention of everyone ; Scott, settled just near her, at the table, had kept her hand in his.

- "I wanted to speak to all of you to apologize for my behaviour for the past few days, because I am aware I've been a real bitch …" she began, receiving understanding smiles or comments saying to her that she hadn't to apologize "No, really, I'm bent on turning over a new leaf" she said before going on "It was stronger than myself, I thought having lost everything –she felt Scott squeezing briefly her hand and answered to it–. Maybe I shouldn't have reacted like I did, but I did it. I want you to know that I'm really sorry for all I could have done or said and for the consequences which it might have resulted. There is a rumour saying that some young students –and in particular the new recruits– were beginning to fear me, so I hope I'll be able to re-establish confidence terms and like it erase their fears in order to show them that, in general, I haven't teeth so sharp…"

Some students blushed. She gave them a smile, one of the first that they saw as regards the most recent students.

> _and thanks to the four of you, who, despite my bad temper, had persisted in wanting to help me _sent Jean by telepathy at Professor Xavier, Ororo, Hank and Logan before ending out loud "Well, I know that's only words, but I was bent on pronouncing them"

She was about to sit down next to Scott but, this last one seeing the things otherwise, passed his arms around her waist –in order not to stretch her by the hand for not hurting her– and made her sit on his kneels.

> _Where did you intend to go ?_ she heard through their bond before two lips laid on hers in a tender kiss.

She closed her eyes and passed her arms around his neck, despising the reactions of some students.

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	36. part 36

I dunno what happened, so I correct the mistake

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Mrs Jean Grey-Summers, Lexan, Slicky and the unknown reviewer !!

**Lexan**: I do have another horrible one but it's still in correction of translation and I don't know when it'll be ended so you'll have to wait.

Remember, the more reviews I get, the sooner I want to post :-)

* * *

Later this day, after the lunch, the professors were all settled in one of the common-rooms to have a coffee whereas Scott was calling his brother –informed of the news before hand by Charles– and that most of the students had gone out to play in the snow, only some of them had stayed inside for watching the TV. Logan and Ororo stayed standing to sip their drink, Storm being leaned against a piece of furniture, Hank had sat next to the Professor and Jean was on the sofa, her kneels folded on it. She was savouring the appeasement of her wounds-pain now that Beast had administrated to her a local-sedative.

- "You seem well pensive Jean" said Charles.

The young woman, hearing her name, went out of her thoughts and gave him a smile.

- "Yes Professor, it's only that I persist to fear that all this is only an illusion, that Scott hasn't come back and that, as for all the others times, I'll wake up to realise that it wasn't real" she answered.

Logan swallowed a gulp of coffee and declared by pointing his cup toward the entry of the common room.

- "hey, it's funny, yer dream is comin' true"

- "I know" breathed Jean, who had felt him approach through their bond.

She turned her head toward him and both of them lovingly smiled to each other. Scott came to sit near her, surrounding her by his arms. They exchanged a kiss and the young woman slightly sighed with ease, resting her head on his shoulder, and closed her eyes in satisfaction.

- "So ?" asked Hank "How Alex did seem to you?"

Scott laid a kiss on Jean's forehead and answered :

- " Oh he wasn't believing his ears despite the fact that the Professor had yet announced to him that I was alive" he answered by softly playing with Jean's fingers, intertwined with his "He was completely overwhelmed with joy and will come to spend Christmas here"

- "With his girlfriend ? This…Linda, it's that ?" asked Logan.

- "No, he told me he wasn't with her anymore."

- "Ah ? She didn't seem bad however" retorted Ororo "She had even accompanied him for...for the ceremony that we had organized in your honour"

- "Certainly cos she couldn't let him in such a moment" Logan answered her.

- "Be that as it may" resumed Scott "He made me promise to cease to play with his nerves"

The Professor approved :

- "Yes, it's the second time that he believes you dead, it's beginning to be a lot for someone of his age…"

A slight silence followed, before Hank did a move of his head toward Jean and told in a low voice :

- "She's fallen asleep"

- "Yeah" breathed Scott.

He turned himself softly for being able to lay down on the sofa with her, without waking her, which he achieved successfully, Jean repositioning herself in her sleep, curling her head in the hollow of his shoulder and surrounding his chest with one of her arms. Scott closed his eyes (although nobody saw it), savouring the feeling to have her against him.

- "She's happy" breathed the Professor a smile on his face.

- "You know Scott, she was only a mere shadow of herself without you" added Ororo "She was barely speaking, wasn't smiling or looking up at us anymore and at the end she wasn't sleeping anymore, overall after…well, you know"

Cyclops nodded, keeping his eyes closed Storm went on :

- "A few time before that, she was doing awful nightmares which had ended by deciding her not to let herself fall asleep anymore and Hank has had to resort to sedatives in order to make her rest."

- "I missed her so much" murmured Scott by kissing the young woman in the forehead, who moved slightly in her sleep and smiled.

Artie arrived in the common-room and went to Hank :

- "Doctor Mc Coy, there's Jamie who has climbed in a tree and got stuck on it" he said.

- "Oh, duty calls" declared Beast "Better hurry myself before Tabitha decides to take extreme measures"

- "Yes, she or another one" approved Storm before adding once Hank was out "This remind me the day when Kaitlin –one of the new students–"she précised for Scott ", had just arrived at the Institute and had taken the shape of a cat whereas Rahne hadn't yet met her and wasn't aware of her capacity to metamorphose herself in felines…"

- "Yes, I remind very well of it; Rahne had caught a glimpse of her as she was in her lupine-shape and, pushed by her instinct she had set off in pursuit of her" smiled the Professor.

- "You're jokin', but it's not ya who had had to run after them for ten minutes…" made noticed Wolverine.

They chatted like that for a while before Beast came back.

- "That's it ? Ya've helped our monkey to come down from his tree ?" asked Logan.

- "Yes, he was really stuck this time"

Storm interjected them :

- "Hey, look at them"

All of them took their attention back to the sofa where Scott had fallen asleep at his turn judging by his particularly relaxed face associated with a slow breath.

- "They're not two on this sofa, they're only one" she said.

- "Yes, here I think that they're henceforth literally inseparables" approved Hank.

- "I often feel them speaking to each other through their link" said the Professor "And I'm almost certain that when they're not in visual or physical contact, they still are psychically. They have found each other again and they won't part anymore"

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	37. the end

The end….

Thanks for the ones who have reviewed : Mrs Jean Grey-Summers, Lexan and Lexan

I didn't know what had happened for the last update, I'had posted the whole part, but 2 different ones had appeared

Wen

* * *

****

One hour later, Scott and Jean decided to go to walk a little in the park, just both of them. They made their way toward the hall and slipped on their coats before going out, hand in hand on the flight of steps the Professor Xavier and Storm were looking the students playing in the snow, insatiable of snowballs battling the mutant way.

- "You are leaving for a walk ?" asked Charles "I intended to ask Hank to undertake to clear the ground of a monument that became useless, but maybe you prefer take care of it by yourself…"

- "Your memorial" said Jean to Scott.

- "Oh, I see; well, I think we'll clear this up"

- "Be careful ok ?" said Storm " Both of you aren't yet in good form"

> _Don't worry Ororo, they will take care of each other_ sent Charles by telepathy, letting Jean hear it.

The young woman smiled to him and she and Scott went away one against the other, paying attention to avoid the snowball battle front.

Once on the spot, Scott recognized the place of his vision. There hadn't snow fall again since, so the biggest blood-flaw let by Jean was still visible, like the vestiges kept on the memorial. In front of the monument, Jean shivered, more because of the recalls it was engendered than because of the cold, Scott felt it and hugged her a little more, laying a kiss on her temple.

- "I don't want to live it again Scott, never ever" she said before indicating the monument with a move of her head "Please, destroy it, I don't want to see it anymore"

Being at a reasonable distance, Scott, keeping an arm around Jean's waist, took off his ruby-quartz-sunglasses and opened his eyes for setting free his power, which crumpled up the memorial. Despite her tiredness, Jean ended the work by sending the pieces of rocks in the lake by telekinesis, and restored like it the place almost like it was before the nightmare. Through their bond, Scott felt how much the fact of having removed this monument, which had symbolized his death during all these months, was soothing the young woman.

- "That's better ?" he asked

- "A lot much" she said "But something is missing…"

She turned herself, passing her arms around his neck and both of them kissed each other during some long minutes, breaking off of the reality, on the very place where –two days ago– Jean had slashed her wrists because of love, in order to rejoin the one she believed was dead. And now, against all hope, she was at the same place, in the arms of a well alive Scott, tasting the soft savour of his lips which she couldn't do without the contact.

* * *

This very evening, Scott and Jean stayed only briefly in the dining room after the supper and slipped away in **_their_** bedroom. Finding themselves alone after all this time, they made love, tenderly and passionately, becoming intoxicated of each other scent, savouring each second, each instant, each sensation. Their psychic-link wide opened, they shared the satisfaction of feeling again the hands of the loved-one caressing their body, their heart beating at a same rhythm, to make only one on all the plans.

Now, it should be after 10.30 p.m. and Scott was asleep for a long time, but Jean had stayed awake. Half laid on him, skin on skin, resting on one of her elbows, she was drawing the contours of his face with her fingertips, without waking him, in the moonlight reflected by the snow. She had a feeling of fullness and of absolute security; they were together, in this room, in this bed, it was so much unreal that she had the impression to be living a woken-dream

Smiling, she laid herself again against him, her head on the bare skin of his chest. She closed her eyes, inhaling deeply his scent, and let the sleep envelop her.

**_End_**

Well, here is : ) maybe there'll be a sequel, it's possible, but I don't know when : )


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